


A Pirate's Nature

by J_EnotsoLovely



Series: The Remedy For A Broken Heart [1]
Category: One Piece
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Acceptance, Angst, Another OC named Akuma, Arguing, Author Does Not Know What They Are DOing, Author Just Wrote What Sounded Good, Bar fights, Canon Era, Canon-Typical Violence, Childhood Friends, Childhood Memories, Childhood Trauma, Confessions, DNA and Other Science Stuff, Denial of Feelings, Dialogue Heavy, Drinking, Drinking & Talking, Fighting, First Kiss, Friendship, Guilt, HOORAY, Incomplete, Internalized Homophobia, Internalized Misogyny, M/M, Marines, Money, Mugiwara no Ichimi | Straw Hat Pirates, Mutual Pining, Mutually Unrequited, My First One Piece Fic, My OC Akira, Nakama, Nakamaship, Nami is a good friend, Nami is amazing, Not too wise though, Orders, Original Akuma no Mi | Devil Fruit, Original Character(s), Original Pirate Crew - Freeform, Past Child Abuse, Perceptive Luffy, Pre-Slash, Robin is also great, Science, Scientific Explanatons, Self-Acceptance, Self-Discovery, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Worth Issues, Smoking, So is Luffy, Soul-Searching, Swithcing POV, Tags May Change, The Author Made Up Some Shit, The Author Regrets Nothing, This story has actual plot now, Understanding, Understanding one another, Usopp did his best, Wise Luffy, Worry, but not really, coming to terms, scary Luffy, violent fighting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-20
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-03-05 03:21:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 44,911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25407553
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/J_EnotsoLovely/pseuds/J_EnotsoLovely
Summary: "All of us...we're more than friends...we're Nakama. But you and Sanji," Luffy looked at Zoro, his gaze dark and serious. "You two are different, I can tell. I don't wanna know why, I don't care. Just work it out, that's an order."In which Zoro and Sanji (especially Sanji) have some issues, most of them mental, and the entire crew tries to help, each in their own quirky way. It starts with Luffy.
Relationships: Minor Nico Robin/Roronoa Zoro - Relationship, Monkey D. Luffy & Roronoa Zoro, Nico Robin/Roronoa Zoro, No love triangles though - Relationship, Roronoa Zoro & Nami, Roronoa Zoro & Tony Tony Chopper, Roronoa Zoro/Vinsmoke Sanji, Usopp & Vinsmoke Sanji
Series: The Remedy For A Broken Heart [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1840417
Comments: 129
Kudos: 255





	1. Captain Says

**Author's Note:**

> HI!!! I'm new to this fandom. Nice to meet you!  
> This is my first One Piece fic and while I love this ship of ZoSan, I love the different crew relationships even more, so thats what I wanted to capitalize on.  
> Please enjoy! Feel free to comment if you like.  
> Oh and I apologize in advance if anything is OOC. Zoro is a harder character to write than I thought.

"Say....say that again."

Zoro could sense, more than feel the stupid face that he was making and struggled to close his mouth, sure that confusion was etched in his expression. Luffy sat on the self-proclaimed seat, an odd throne of sorts, the lamb head staring stoically out at the vast sea, taking in the deepening blue. It was almost a childish vision, the image of his captain seated with legs crossed as he looked down at the green head with a near invisible pout and completely at odds with the somber atmosphere. It was rare, exceedingly so, for the 17 year old to summon any one of his crewmates, subsequently commanding the others to stay away. Zoro'd been stumped as to what the ravenette would want with _him_ of all people, but Luffy had that look. 

The dangerous one that was instantly intimidating to any man who was lesser in spirit. The one and only sign of the beast lurking within his captain. The simple reason as to why Zoro chose to follow Luffy in the first place, to bow and make the younger teen his leader. 

And here his captain was, after molding such a serious air, saying stupid shit like the typical idiot he was.

"His meat." The rubberman started again, letting the two words out in a slow drawl, as if the swordsman was the dumb one. "Sanji's meat has been tasting weird lately. Its starting to mess with my stomach a bit, but I'm not sure why. I just know I don't like it."

_Food._

Of _course_ this dumbass meant food. What the hell else? Ignoring the sensation of relief pooling into his stomach, the 19 year old let loose a small smirk. As if _Luffy_ would bother with something as troublesome as romance, let alone sex.

_And troublesome it is._ He shook off the thought, shrugging away the feeling of apprehension and raised an eyebrow, understanding the conversation, but not knowing where it was heading.

"I could care less about the shit cook's new techniques. Why should it matter?" 

Already the other was shaking his head, brim of the notorious straw hat flopping along with the motion. "You don't get it, do you Zoro? I think its _your_ fault that the meat is tasting so weird."

_"HAH??!"_ The swordsman exclaimed, bristling at the apparent accusation. "I haven't done a damn thing to curly brow. Hardly even seen the stupid ero-cook lately." He finished adamantly, tactfully leaving out the fact that he'd been avoiding the blonde for reasons he didn't want to look to deep into, as well as the torrent of emotions the chef caused to well within him.

Luffy's gaze bored into his own, charcoal glare eerily perceptive and without realizing it, Zoro fell silent, waiting to see what would happen next.

"No." Came his captain's voice, calm, assured, and all-empowering. It shut down even the smallest chance for argument and knowing it was pointless the green head grunted, leaning against the railing to gaze out at the water. 

After a moment the tan teen sighed, clutching his swords. "Spill it Luffy. What're you on about?"

"Something's bothering Sanji. Messing with him, kinda like how his food has been messing with me." The 17 year old glanced down as his abdomen with a curious gaze, as if the rumblings of his stomach would reveal some magical answer. No such luck. "He smiles all the time, but seems sad. And its like he's using the food as mirror or something. Its weird."

Zoro grit his teeth, frustrations growing, at odds with his increasing concern. If the cook was distressed enough that Luffy could describe it with a fair amount of ease then something had to be seriously wrong. But then, the rubberman was always scarily intuitive when it came to nakamaship.

_And the shit cook's shitty mood has something to do with me?_ He growled lowly, lips parting in a scowl. "What does that even mean? And the hell do you want _me_ to do about it?"

Luffy was stupid not naive. Which was exactly why Zoro was worried.

Instead of answering, the ravenette looked back out at the sea, black eyes bright, the silence only growing to uncomfortable proportions before a wide child-like grin split his features.

And then Monkey D. Luffy looked right at the 19 year old, mischievousness written all over, and tilted to the side, falling directly in the ocean below. 

" _DAMN IT LUFFY!"_ Zoro yelled, his body already in motion long before the thought even crossed his mind to jump in after his captain. They'd been lucky on weather the past few days, enjoying the calm waters and today was no different. In a flash he was in the water, cool liquid pleasant against his skin as he propelled himself deeper into the ocean. It never failed to be a disturbing sight to see someone of such awesome strength be reduced to weakness so easily. The smaller male was already a good distance below the water when Zoro finally caught up, amazed at just how fast devil users sank. He wrapped his arms around the ravenette and began the ascent upwards, lungs just starting to burn. Looking over to make sure his captain was still alive, if not conscious, the swordsman almost dropped the body.

On Luffy's face was a small, satisfied smile. One of happiness, and _not_ the expression someone who can't swim should make while drowning. 

As the neared the surface, Zoro braced his arm, preparing to throw the unconscious male on deck. _Payback for all the times you tossed me around like a rag doll. I only wish you were awake. Damn idiot, you'd probably find the whole thing fun anyways._

With a great heave, the swordsman flung his arm forward, grinning viciously as he head the telltale slap of a body against the wooden floor, followed by a long drawn out, "OW!"

Using his right hand, he reached to his side, grabbing hold of Wado Ichimonji and swingin in a wide arc, slicing the water and hooking her in between the railings. Using the curve of the sheath he lifted himself up, feet pushing off the hull of the Going Merry. Flipping himself over the side, the older teen let loose a low grunt of disapproval. He hadn't meant to take his katanas with him into the water, but saving Luffy had been priority and he'd acted without thinking.

Laying Wado gently on the ground, he bowed down in front of her, muttering, "Domou Arigatou Kuina. I promise to give her a good cleaning tonight" before looking around for his captain.

Luffy was back on the lamb's head, staring down at him curiously and laughed when Zoro met his gaze. "Shiihihihihihi Thanks! Looks like I almost died."

He felt his eye twitch. "What the _hell_?! Come down here and I'll kill you for real!"

"Sorry! I got distracted." The ravenette stated, ignoring the threat, not looking the least apologetic and wrung out his hat before staring down at it with a fond grin, different from any that Zoro had seen him give. "But hey, its okay! It doesn't matter at all, since you were here!"

Without another word Luffy slapped the hat on the swordsman's head and let it nestle there, silently staring.

""All of us...we're more than friends...we're Nakama. We'll always be there for each other, the way you were here for me. But you and Sanji," Luffy looked at Zoro, his gaze dark and serious. "You two are different, I can tell. I don't wanna know why, I don't care. Just work it out, that's an order."

He jumped off the headboard, running towards the kitchen and leaving Zoro in his wake, staring after his captain with utter confusion and the sensation of deja vu. The ravenette was still soaked, dripping all over the wood and distantly, the green head wondered who'd be the first to fall on their ass. It was a moment before he noticed that Luffy had stopped and was once again looking at him, expression unreadable.

"You like him right? Sanji? I don't know what it feels like, liking someone in that kind of way, but I gotta say..." The younger trailed off, face pondering. "it seems like its hurting you. And not just you. I want to help, but it doesn't seem like there's much I can do." 

"Lu--"

"You know Zoro...we _are_ pirates. If you want something, you just need to take it. But if you force my cook into doing something he doesn't want I'll beat you up."

And with that the boy disappeared, nothing but the large puddle of water to show he'd ever been there. That and his joyful yelling. "SANJI! MESHI!" 

Zoro laughed, voice hollow. Of course his captain knew. And ordered him to do the one thing he'd been trying to avoid.

Confess.

* * *

It was later that night when Zoro came to the conclusion of _fuck it_ and decided to just spill his guts to the cook, face rejection, and then train the disappointment away. In the end, them being Nakama was of most importance and was something that couldn't be jeopardized for any reason. 

He touched Wado briefly, centering himself. There was no God, but he believed that his adoptive sister's spirit remained with him. The nagging woman would never let him become the strongest swordsman without her around.

"No point in dragging this out any longer. I'm already sick of Luffy's pointed looks." The teen mumbled and reached for the doorknob to the men's barracks, before freezing, body tensing without his permission. He could hear the cook's voice rise through the barrier, strained and high-strung.

"It's _sick. It's wrong. Can't you see that?"_

"Its unorthodox sure but---" That was Usopp's voice, the sharp shooter sounding equally terrified and stern.

"BUT WHAT??? As long at its _LOVE?_ Is that what you were going to say? How awfully romantic you, and completely ignoring the fact that love between men shouldn't even _exist_ in the first place."

"Its not wrong though. Its perfectly normal. People are different and there's nothing wrong with liking both women and mhpgpgp--"

"Don't." That was the blonde, words seethed in a harsh whisper. "Don't you dare finish that last sentence."

A loud thud could be heard, the floors vibrating from the sheer force of whatever collision happened, but Zoro was too far gone, letting the shit cook's words flow over him. 

_Sick huh?_

He knew the other would reject him, but not with so much venom and hatred. And Zoro hadn't even needed to confess.

Wordlessly, the teen turned, stumbling for the first time in a long time and felt disgustingly out of tune with his body.

_Sick._

He was sick.

Numbly, Zoro made his way to Chopper's office.


	2. Thirst for Love, Drunk on Hate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stepping into the tub, he gripped faucet handle, turning it to the side and watching with grateful eyes as chug after chug of warm, cascading liquid gushed out. He sank down, blowing out a contented sigh and let his mind wander. Automatically-- though really Sanji should've expected it- his thoughts turned to Zoro, and the familiar question that he asked himself rang through head.
> 
> "Why do I love you?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again!  
> Before reading this chapter, it'd likely be a better experience for you to go and read both part two and part three. It isn't needed, but I'm sure it'd be better anyways.  
> Regardless, please enjoy!  
> There will be minor Whole Cake Arc spoilers!

Sanji was starting to think that he was a masochist.

 _"Hey.....shitty cook."_ Rang a voice in his head, low, husky with desire, and the teen screwed his eyes shut, letting out a frustrated growl. _"I think I--"_

Love you. I think I love you.

That's what _he_ was going to say, sentence never being completed because the blonde consistently woke up before the words could be uttered. Before his heart thought it was real Before it would try to shout, "I love you!" back. He felt the familiar sensation of revulsion creep down his spine and tried to shake it off, remembering what Usopp told him the night before.

_"Good. It'll all work out in the end then. And that's the Great Captain Usopp's 1000% guarantee!!!"_

The words brought him comfort, ironic seeing as it came from the Straw Hat's infamous liar. A big mouth in the worst of ways, boasting flippantly anytime the chance arose. It was with that thought, that the chef realized how quiet it was. 

Too quiet.

He sat up, having on fallen asleep on the floor last night and looked around, confused when he didn't spot anyone in the room, bright sun rays filtered through the windows and light chasing away even the shadows tucked within crevices. There was a rare feeling of peace, and an odd sensation of loneliness before Sanji's sleep and marimo muddled brain realized that it was much too luminescent for early morning. And that the chef typically arose before the sun even dared to peek above the horizon, having already begun breakfast preparations and lunch pre-planning.

_Breakfast._

Sanji sprung to his feet and dashed out of the barracks, eyes wide and hardly aware of his less than pleasurable appearance. He was a terrible excuse for a chef, and had left his crew to fend for themselves. The others, would likely be okay but Luffy was probably suffering and the blond could hardly stop the feeling of guilt from swelling. He sprinted down the halls, sending a quick prayer of thanks to whatever gods may be up there that his sense of direction wasn't as shitty as the swordsman's, then cursed himself for even thinking about the green headed muscle bound idiot. 

" _SANJI! YOU'RE FINALLY AWAKE! MESHI SANJI MESHI!"_

The blond glanced up, not bothering to slow down and made eye contact with Luffy, who was perched atop of the galley, crouched as though he were a bird. A wide smile split the ravenette's face as he jumped up and down and Sanji couldn't help but replicate the expression, enthusiasm dangerously contagious.

"Get down if you're going to do that Luffy-san, if you keep jumping like that, Usopp will be stuck trying to fix it. What if he breaks his neck and dies?" Two arms appeared and gripped the rubberman by the waist, ignoring the teens loud whines of protest-- as well as Usopp's indignant, "CAN YOU A STOP SAYING THINGS LIKE THAT ROBIN!"-- and flung the captain off, directly in the path of the chef.

Without thinking, Sanji stopped in his tracks, throwing out a leg and trusting the ravenette to understand his implications. The giddy laugh of "Shihihihihihi" was proof enough as the younger stretched out his arms, hooking it around the blond's calf and using it as a stabilizing force to pull himself towards, slowing the fall and landing lightly on the chef's leg before jumping off. 

"Ahhhhh that was fun!" 

"Of course _you'd_ think getting thrown off of a mini building during midday was fun." He replied, ruffling his captain's raven locks, before processing that the 17 year old's hat was nowhere in sight. He opened his mouth to ask-- knowing how defensive his captain was about the accessory-- but stopped when he noticed that Luffy was staring at him with intense concentration. The teen's eyes were narrowed and head tilted as he glared excruciatingly at the blond, a frown set in his mouth and hand placed on his chin.

After a few moments that felt like an eternity, Luffy perked, lifting a finger and point it at Sanji. "That's what was wrong!" His captain exclaimed, sounding satisfied at having found the supposed source of the problem. "Your clothes! I don't think I've ever seen you wear anything but suits before!"

Sanji looked down at the loose pants he had on, faded and almost falling apart at the seams, coupled with a baggy white shirt, one that Zeff lent to him a long time ago. He looked around to see everyone staring at him with variations of amusement and shock, particularly from the ladies and felt his face heat up tremendously, before recovering and responding smoothly. "Yeah, they're my sleep ware, not the prettiest, but they get the job done. That being said, its not like they're magical so can someone tell me why after I overslept, no one came to get me-- specifically one of our lovely princesses? GOOD MORNING MY BEAUTIFUL NAMI-SWAN AND THE MESMERIZING ROBIN-CHWAN! The two of you look absolutely ravishing today. I am ashamed to have left you within the company of these heathens for so long. Please loves, I beg that you bear with me, and lunch will be out shortly."

"Take your time Cook-san, don't rush on our account. I'm sure we've all weathered much worse before than just a skipped breakfast." Robin smiled softly, glancing up from whatever novel she was reading under the shade, rich blue eyes flashing mischievously and Sanji felt his heart skip a beat, distantly thinking that _this_ was what he lived for. Pleasing _women._ Not the stupid, _stupid_ Marimo that he most definitely did _not_ notice wasn't anywhere in sight. And it certainly was _not_ a feeling of worry that invaded the chef's chest, eradicating any sense of euphoria from a few seconds before.

"Usopp told us not to wake you!!" Luffy pouted, referring to the blond's earlier question. "He wouldn't tell us why. Saying something about you needing the rest even though you were one of the first ones to go to sleep! I'm hungry now Sanji! MESHI!"

"Yeah, I thought that was rather strange." Nami spoke, looking up from the map she was drawing to fix the 19 year old with a concerned chocolate gaze. "You feeling alright Sanji? Will we need to make a detour for medical supplies? It'll cost you though if we do. Speaking of which, I don't see Chopper around, I wonder if he's in his office."

Sanji glared at the curly headed teen, hoping that his visible eye clearly conveyed the promise from the night before.

_“A-am I to assume that in the event this conversation somehow spreads, I’ll have ended up at the bottom of the ocean?”_

_"You would be absolutely correct monsieur. Other than the fact that I’d likely beat you beyond recognition first.”_

It was evident the sniper remembered with crystal clarity when he hid behind a barrel, muttering something about how he thought the blond would appreciate the gesture, which Sanji _did_ but it was still too random and out of the blue for his crew to not find it bizarre. 

Knowing it was with good intentions, Sanji shoved down his misgivings and gave a tight nod, before looking back at the red headed beauty and showing her his most charming smile-- which would surely distract from his less than presentable attire. "How kind, oh how benevolent of you dear Nami-swan my sweet. I _was_ feeling a bit under the weather but after basking under your radiance I am a thousand times cured! However, I am a bit of a mess right now." He directed this last bit to everyone on deck, feeling bad for he was about to ask but still figuring he could chance it. "Do you think you all can handle 30 more minutes or so without anything? I'd like to take a shower but if you feel you're absolutely starving I don't mind staying to fix a snack."

 _"YES_ STAY! SANJI! I WANT FOO--GMHFDCDB _."_ A hand appeared over Luffy's mouth and Robin spoke, a fleeting grin crossing her features though infinite amusement shone within her blur iris'. "Please go on cook-san. Take as much time as you need. I'm sure you'll give us a magnificent meal upon your return."

"Of course my darling, it will be the most delectable thing that your taste buds could even imagine! I'll be sure to imbued it with only the finest of ingredients for both you and Nami-swan!"

At her nod, he turned and made his way back to the barracks, letting his worry for Zoro finally take precedence in his mind. It wasn't odd not to see the moss-head, but Chopper hadn't been there either, the normally chipper and cute reindeer usually hanging off of Usopp's shoulder or joining in whatever shenanigans his captain decided to create. It was said that idiots didn't get sick, but still, could the Marimo have fallen ill?

 _"It's_ _sick. It's wrong. Can't you see that?"_

His own words from the night before came back to him and the blond grimaced, the irony not lost on his mind. He'd admitted to himself for the first--and only time that he was in love with the swordsman. That was in love-- _hopelessly--_ in love with Roronoa Zoro. 

He felt the bitter taste of bile rise in his throat, the sinking feeling of dread in his stomach and shook his head to rid himself of the thought. Even if he was able to set aside his personal problems and confess to the other, try to work things out on equal footing, there was no doubt in his mind that all that would face him was rejection. No matter how Sanji looked at it, things were bound to go wrong. His safest bet was to let the feelings blow over, and focus only on women. On protecting them, but understanding that they weren't incapable of caring for themselves.

He reached the barracks and walked inside, stripping slowly. The water generator had already been used recently so there still a fair amount of hot water left and the chef rejoiced silently. 

Stepping into the tub, he gripped faucet handle, turning it to the side and watching with grateful eyes as chug after chug of warm, cascading liquid gushed out. He sank down, blowing out a contented sigh and let his mind wander. Automatically-- though really Sanji should've expected it- his thoughts turned to Zoro, and the familiar question that he asked himself rang through head.

_"Why do I love you?"_

Disgust thrashed within him, a poisonous snake warning him not to go down such a dangerous path lest he be bitten, but maybe it was the steam addling his sense of reason that made the chef ignore the caution.

-+-

_His favorite color was blue, though anyone who had known him for a significant amount of time would be hard pressed to object and say that it was actually green. His heart and soul belonged to the sea-- rightfully so because the sea had been his savior. Brilliant colors lighting up his bleak life and giving it a meaning he was raised to believe he didn't deserve. However, Sanji would be lying if he said his mind wasn't fascinated by land. Trees, plants, and herbs, water, fish, and home; the ocean and forests both painted him with a warm sensation of comfort. The sense of being so wholly unimportant, waters exceedingly vast and hiding him from the clutching palms of **those people.** The sea was his shelter. The forest was a reminder that there was still someplace else to go, if pirating ever grew to be distasteful, a rather funny oxymoron considering that land and trees cannot drift, are to be locked forever in the same spot and yet signify a bigger world. That there is always more beyond what the eye could see. Gol D. Roger was a fantastic pirate, a warrior on the ocean, but his call to the people happened on land._

_Zoro had taken Sanji's heart captive on the sea. When the swordsman raised his katana in the air and declared Luffy as King of the Pirates. When he shed salty tears, a similar blue as to the water around them and upon the sight Sanji had an epiphany. A simple understanding that if land and ocean had discovered a way to merge, to personify, it's accumulation would be this: The Swordsman Roronoa Zoro._

_His favorite color was blue, for the sky and sea reminded him of lovely women, calm one moment and wickedly violent the next. They were forces to be reckoned with, for women carried within them the will of Mother Nature herself, blessed with tranquility and gifted with assets, necessary for survival. Women were a harbinger of life and more dangerous than death, much like the water surrounding him. Sanji's favorite color was blue, beautiful, cerulean blue, though in some part deep inside, his mind locked away the truth that green had taken precedence in his heart. It started with taunts, brazen jibes to each other's appearance. Insulting one another's skill, knowing that it was lies. There was a a sickening satisfaction he felt when Zoro's blatant, unfriendly scowl often disappeared into a rough smirk whenever the chef came around. It was followed by another exchanging of words and an inevitable fight where Sanji had been loathe to admit that the green head was quite possibly his equal._

_Marimo._

_It was a moss ball that the chef once_ _owned at the Baratie, too lazy to give it a true name. It was fuzzy and soft and cute and Sanji had hated it because although the plant was edible, he couldn't bring himself to do away with it. He'd grown fond of the stupid thing, disgustingly fond and he hated Marimo for that, often raising a knife high in the air with intents to split the damn thing in half, only to stop and sigh, rubbing the silky hairs along his cheek._

_Sanji had given Zoro the name Marimo, in honor of his old plant friend-- which Zeff soon threw in the ocean once he understood the blonde would not eat it-- and contrary to whatever bullshit the tan teen had spewed afterwards, the chef thought that Zoro quite liked the nickname._

_He felt his ears burn as he came to the realization that the knowledge made him stupidly happy._

_He didn't bother to wipe the silly grin off of his face._

_-_

_It was during their time at Arlong Park that Sanji realized he hated women._

_Not truly._

_He could never bring himself to despise the magnificent creatures who were benevolent enough to give birth to life itself. But while watching Nami break down, bleeding her heart out, and pleading for help, he came to the conclusion that he hated women's fragility. That he never wanted to be saddled with the insurmountable burdens that women faced._

_That he didn't want to be weak._

_And the moment the thought had crossed his mind, Sanji had hated himself more than ever before. Because it was proof, undeniable proof that he let **those people** taint him. That at some point, he began to believe **their** words, began to agree with **their** ideology: that women were useless in the real world and better suited to home life. But he didn't agree that they were toys meant to sate the male hormonal whims. _

_He didn't see women as lesser, if anything, they were Goddesses, destined to be forever worshiped. Sanji wanted to protect them._

_But he feared being seen as feminine, because even though he didn't agree with **them** , there was no telling who else thought that weakness equaled femininity. And as **they** beat him, as **they** tortured him, **they** told his 10 year old self that he was no better than a woman, and to be a woman was to subjugate yourself to a man, to allow oneself to be raped. To be used._

_Sanji hated that, that was the one lesson he couldn't_ shake. _He was trapped within an odd limbo, set in a mentality that wasn't even his._

_And when his feelings for Zoro blossomed, it was terrifying, because Zoro was strong. And Sanji knew, he just **knew** that the moment he allowed his guard to drop, the swordsman would rip into him viciously, would see the cook as nothing but a mere woman. No longer someone worthy of being on equal footing. Without knowing how he knew, Sanji knew that Zoro wasn't the kind of man to protect women. _

_Then the chef heard about a certain Marimo who made a promise to a certain girl. A girl who was not the subject of love, and not a promise to come back alive. It wasn't romantic in the slightest._

_It was a promise between rivals._

_It was the moment Sanji realized that women could fend for themselves. That his chivalry was-- in hindsight-- remarkably condescending. But he couldn't stop._

_Somewhere deep inside, buried withing the depths of his insecurities, Sanji felt a hot scorching sensation of guilt._

_Because **they** had beat the ideals into him. **They** planted the seed in his mind and watched gleefully as it grew, amplified by the death of his mother. **They** rejoiced, because there was a part of him that **they** had full control over._

_And Sanji didn't think that **they** would let go any time soon._

_-_

_Sanji loved Zoro._

_He knew it, he knew he couldn't lie to himself anymore. Not when the idiot thought cutting off legs was a good idea._

_Later when the situation had been resolved, and the Strawhats gained some much needed rest time, the chef found a secluded part of the ship and threw up until he dry heaved._

_He loved Zoro._

_And he hated it. It was wrong. He was a lady's man. He put on the planet to chase after beautiful, demure women. To pamper them senseless. So he hated that it Zoro who stole his heart._

_Though mainly because he knew the swordsman would never love him back._

-+-

"Oi! Sanji!" Usopp yelled from the other side of the door, sounding both annoyed and concerned. "You still alive in there?? It's been more than 30 minutes and Robin has stopped Luffy from breaking into the kitchen at least three times by now." A loud thud sounded, punctuating the statement and the chef could almost feel the sniper's grimace. "Make that four times."

" _Damn."_ Sanji cursed, pissed that his mind betrayed him, sending him down into a spiral of dark thoughts. "I'll be up soon! Thanks for the warning. Tell Luffy I'll cook him a platter of vegetables if he doesn't fucking _behave."_ He added, hissing the last words as he stepped out the tub, wrapping a towel around his waist and stumbling to the sink to brush his teeth, already wishing for a cigarette--which was long overdo.

"W-wharever you say!" Usopp replied, the younger seemingly having picked up on the murderous intent. There was a pause then, "You sure that you're alright? I don't want to pry, but you _are_ my nakama."

The blonde sighed, flattered truly, but not even remotely in the mood. "I'm alright." He mumbled around a mouth of toothpaste foam. "Go on up and try to keep our captain at bay for me."

"Alright then. Just--have faith okay?" And the the sniper was gone, the pattering of his feet traveling away, until it faded under the sound of running water.

 _Faith?_ The blond thought, turning the word over in his mind. _I'm not so sure such a thing exists anymore._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so writing this was a blast! I'm even more stoked for next chapter! There'll be lots of feels and one hell of a rollercoaster.  
> I hope you liked it and thanks for reading!


	3. Blood Water

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Aww come on Sanji! You can't be that weak. Doesn't that mean he's like a woman? Papa said that women were supposed to do whatever we said because that was their job. And if Sanji's this weak, then he's like a woman. Which means...we can do whatever we want to him." The voice rang in his head and Sanji growled, baring his teeth in a deep scowl. "Shut up." He whispered, insecurities rearing their ugly head, though beneath it all was fear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again!  
> We've gotten to the gooooooooooooood stuff. At least I hope so.  
> Lots of fighting!  
> Said by an author who's bad at writing fight scenes.  
> Oof. F's in the chat, sad noises. Its okay! You guy's just enjoy the ride, I, Author-chan, promise to do my very best.

This fight wasn't like the others. It was intense in a way that it shouldn't have been. Remarkably violent, sickening pops and echoing squeal of shoes against wood replacing the normally harsh, yet playful remarks.

Each strike was designed to maim, rather than harm. Maul, rather than taunt.

They were on the lower end of the deck, down the stairs of the Going Merry, not far from the foremast. Their pirate flag flew above them, smiling skull gazing stoically out at the calm ocean. Bottles littered the ground, each empty and drained of the valuable liquor. 

He'd spotted the overgrown algae resting near the rails, green haramaki garishly offensive and Luffy's straw hat shielding the tan, stupidly handsome face from the world-- rightfully so. At the sight, Sanji had paused, the significance of the image before him settling heavy in his gut. He'd brushed the uneasy feeling off with a quiet scoff. It was _Luffy._

There couldn't possibly have been any romantic or sentimental feelings in the gesture, even though their captain almost _never_ let anyone touch the prized possession. 

"You damn cook, I _told_ you I was thirsty."

Sanji saw the snap of Zoro's wrist, a subtle flick, a twitch of muscle, and heard a sound like a whistle, then cursed under his breath as he felt his foot tether off course, steel sliding against leather. He angled his foot, stopping the blade before it could reach his shoulder and shred the expensive fabric. "I don't give a flying fuck _what_ you were!"

The blond sprung forward, using speed and dexterity to dash towards his opponent, tonguing the cigarette in his mouth and flicking it at the green head spitefully. "You drank my alcohol storage dry. Not to mention the damn _white wine,_ which isn't even designed for casual consumption you arrogant asshole! I needed it to make dinner tonight!"

The swordsman dodged his kick easily, tilting his head to the side with an evil smirk, gray eyes flashing and clearly pleased with the chef's furious disposition. As if drinking all the liquor had been an act of revenge and Sanji completely _deserved_ it.

Fucking asshole.

"What's the matter shit-cook? Mad 'cause you have nothing special to serve to your _precious_ ladies? Maybe you should've guarded the key better, though its not like that would've stopped me either way."

Zoro crouched low, only one sword in hand and Sanji felt a fresh wave of anger. As if the green head using only one blade represented his feelings towards the blonde. As if the tan teen was deeming him to be _lesser._

 _"Aww come on Sanji! You can't be_ that _weak. Doesn't that mean he's like a woman? Papa said that women were supposed to do whatever we men said because that was their job. And if Sanji's this weak, then he's like a woman. Which means...we can do whatever we want to him."_ The voice rang in his head and Sanji growled, baring his teeth in a deep scowl. _"Shut up."_ He whispered, insecurities rearing their ugly head, though beneath it all was fear. Fear of the people he'd die before calling _family_. Fear that **_they_** were right and he deserved to be subjugated to a man. Fear that he'd eventually snap and kill the other. That whatever power _**those people**_ shoved inside him would surge out. That in the process, Zoro would refuse to just leave, would probably get lost on the way to hell. And that Sanji would be happy, so happy. To the point that he'd break. He'd shatter even more than he already was. "Shut up. Shut up. _SHUT UP_!"

He watched as Zoro came to him, whirling on his feet with a balance and grace that was disgustingly unfair for a man of his size. The sword sang praises as it sliced through the air, as though it was rejoicing to the possibility of tasting blood. The tan teen slashed downward, cut dangerously close to the chef's face and he gazed in begrudging admiration as locks of blonde hair glided towards the ground.

Sanji allowed the his body bend into a quick black flip and leapt unto the rails, legs bent and stance steady. He sneered. "To think you'd stoop so low as to steal from a _kid_. What happened to honor and pride and discipline and all of that, huh? So much for _that_ bullshit."

Zoro growled, gray eyes darkening to black and without breaking contact, he reached for another sword, bringing them across his chest in an 'X'. The blonde tried not to feel satisfied at the added weapon, instead reprimanding his unfiltered speech and further putting himself at a disadvantage. 

The other stalked forward, a predator to prey and Sanji knew that he couldn't walk into those blades, not if he wanted to keep both of his legs. He stayed at a ready, trying to anticipate the swordsman's next move, when he spotted a nearby bottle of sake on the ground, liquid sloshing inside from the constant movement on the deck and exposed by the sunlight. Sanji smirked, lips twitching at the absence of his cigarette and he dived to the floor, sliding his hands out of his pockets and landed, hooking the bottle on his foot and kicking it at Zoro.

As expected, the teen sliced directly through it without exerting much effort, though the action elicited a hiss as the green head was momentarily blinded by the substance. Sanji took the opportunity to get in close, hoping to limit the other's reach. He raised his leg to deliver a blow and faster than he'd ever seen before, even from old man Zeff, his kick was blocked. The silver gleam of a blade was the only indication of what had stopped the attack, and the blonde spared a thought to wonder how the _hell_ Zoro had done that.

The green head was wearing a sinister smile, gaze narrowed and strangely exhilarated. The sun shone and belatedly, Sanji realized he was close enough to count the individual flecks of gold hidden in the depth's of Zoro's eyes. It was mesmerizing, enough to make him forget what they were doing, why they were fighting in the first. And an ache ravaged his heart, a desperate pleading of _why can't we always be this close? Why does it have to be when we fight?_ The tan teen's face softened a fraction and Sanji could almost believe that the other felt it too.

The inexplicable pull.

"Zoro." Luffy's voice sounded, breaking the spell, and the blonde spared a glance up, seeing their captain perched on the headboard, peering down with a pointed glare. "I thought I told you to deal with it."

He didn't miss the way Zoro bared his teeth, green brows furrowed in frustration. "It isn't as easy as you make it sound Luffy."

"See." That was Nami's voice, she was pouring over a map on the upper level and didn't even bother to look towards the action sounding bored and knowing. "I told you he wouldn't crack."

"And I'm telling you to give it time." That was Usopp, tinkering with some new gadget near the rudder, sounding exasperated. "We can go double or nothing if it'll placate you. But don't pull anything funny when I win."

"Deal!" Nami responded, and for once Sanji couldn't help but feel a flare of anger. He had no clue what they were betting on, but he hated that he was in the middle of it, felt disrespected and shoved on display. He wasn't meant to be the center of attention in any situation. He wasn't a woman. That was _their_ job. They were meant to be fawned over and shown off.

At the thought, he winced, scoffing at his idiocy. The chef hated that he was this way.

Almost as if he'd read his mind, Zoro laughed, devoid of any real mirth. 'What's the matter shit cook? Debating if you should abandon the fight like a coward? I'm starting to think the only thing you can do is run away."

It hit too close to the truth.

Slowly, Sanji lowered his leg, taking a deep breath and wishing desperately for his smokes. In an instant the green head had a bloody nose, and a cut cheek, though Sanji couldn't remember ever moving, especially not with the katana pressing against his neck. That and, he'd no clue when he grabbed the previously shattered bottle and pointed it at the swordsman's throat.

It was followed by the realization that _holy shit_ he was using his hands.

 _"EH???_ SANJI, YOU'RE USING YOUR HANDS!" Luffy echoed the thought, filled with awe and excitement.

"WHAT???" Usopp and Nami exclaimed, their perfect unison almost frightening. 

"GUYS STOP PLEASE." Chopper came running from his office, young eyes wide and frantic. He stood next to the older teens, fur bristling. "SANJI STOP THIS. YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS! IT WASN'T ZORO'S FAULT. IT WAS--"

 ** _"SHUT UP. Not another word Tony."_** Zoro growled, effectively silencing the boy.

Chopper stared at them with tears beginning to well and sniffed loudly, feet shuffling. "B-but Zoro. Sanji doesn't have to be mad at you anymore for stealing the key from me since I--"

"Chopper, _please."_ The green head pleaded, uncharacteristically gentle. "I _need_ this."

Sanji felt his heart swell with happiness, feeling proud that Zoro felt the need to be with _him,_ to be in this moment, right where Sanji was. That and the sudden realization that judging from Chopper's guilty expression Zoro never stile the key, meaning that something was seriously wrong if it'd been handed over willingly. In that moment he wanted to stop fighting. He wanted to pull Zoro close and apologize. He wanted to count each fleck of gold feel the warmth of the swordsman's body.

He killed the thought, revulsion washing up and drowning him in dread. He felt like heaving, throwing up into the ocean until all the attraction he had towards the other washed away to the bottom of the sea. _I hate this._ "I _hate_ you. I hate you so fucking much, the sight of you makes me sick to my goddamn stomach. Being around you makes me wish I _starved and died."_ Sanji whispered venomously, regretting the words the moment they slipped past his lips.

The ship was silent, the first real silence that they'd had in a long time and the blonde tensed, unable to look the other in the eye, feeling disgusted with himself yet again. He waited for a smart remark, or maybe the sensation of his head hitting the floor, detached from his body, but none of that happened.

Instead, Zoro took a step back, and with a practice flick, cleared the blood off of Wado before sheathing it and smirking at the chef. "I know. But that ship had sailed by, hasn't it?" The swordsman replied, then nodded to Sanji's hand. "Careful not to cut your hands cook. Important, aren't they?" As if to prove his point Zoro leaned forward, piercing his throat. Sanji watched as a drop of blood trailed down that tan neck, a string of emotions running high.

"Human's are fragile things." The swordsman stated robotically, as though repeating something once told to him. "They break easily." The green head glanced up to Luffy, who'd stopped watching their fight a while back. "Seems I've upset the shit-cook. Enough for him to say he hates me. You gonna kick my ass now?"

The ravenette thought for a moment, before smiling widely and shaking his head. "No, buuuuuut" He stretched his arm, retrieving the fallen straw hat and slapped it back on Zoro's head. "You gotta take care of this you know. Its my treasure."

Sanji watched as Zoro patted the hat with a fond grin and felt his chest contract, wishing the smile was directed at _him_ instead.

He turned and walked away, mind filled and heart heavy, mouth tasting of dread. "I know we just ate lunch not too long ago, but there's rations in the pantry. Try not to eat all of it okay? I'll go pre-plan dinner."

Luffy cheered, his happy laugh echoing on the silent ship.

Sanji hated when it was quiet.

It was when **_their_** voices were the loudest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SORRY!  
> I cut this chapter short. Mainly out of impatience and a pretty decent ending anyways.  
> Well I hope you enjoyed. More fighting next chapter, but don't worry, it'll be a lot more poetic and pretty sounding even though its gonna be a bloodbath kinda :)  
> As always, feel free to comment, I'm curious to know your thoughts!


	4. A Captain Walks Into His Chef's Kitchen....Except It Isn't A Joke

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Terrifying.
> 
> That was the only way to describe it. The feeling of murderous aura flowing in gushing, unrestrained waves with enough power to drop a lesser man. Coupled with the open, friendly smile of his captain and the ominous sensation grew in force.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short but hopefully engaging chapter today  
> Please enjoy!

Luffy was already in the galley waiting by the time Sanji got there, only mildly perturbed. The raven head could be scarily stealthy when he wanted to be.

"You need anything Captain? Pantry's below deck you know." The blonde said, pulling out a much needed cigarette and reached in his vest pocket for a lighter, hands shaking slightly.

"I'm not here for food." The other stated plainly and Sanji startled, dropping the lighter in surprise and damn near setting him alight in the process.

"The _hell_ do you mean you don't want food? You're not sick right?" He asked, only half joking and feeling a mix between apprehensive and concerned. 

Luffy didn't answer right away, instead choosing to stare stoically at the other male, black gaze seeming as though it could see right through the chef's calm facade, and instantly the somber atmosphere returned, doubled in strength. "Don't worry, I'll eat when we're done talking."

Terrifying.

That was the only way to describe it. The feeling of murderous aura flowing in gushing, unrestrained waves with enough power to drop a lesser man. Coupled with the open, friendly smile of his captain and the ominous sensation grew in force.

There were no words or descriptions that could fully encompass the horrifying power that was Monkey D. Luffy, the future Pirate King. Sanji felt his knees buckle slightly under the glare and felt his face flush in shame, grabbing a chair and taking a seat, feeling like he lost some silent battle. No amount of stalling was going to end this conversation any sooner, so he lit his cancer stick and took a long drag, steeling himself for whatever was to come.

"Sanji, you're my Nakama. You're my chef. And you mean a lot to me. Everyone does. This crew is my family." The younger started and the blonde nodded slowly, hairs on his neck standing solemnly at attention. "We fight all the time. That said, if you _ever_ do something to hurt Zoro on purpose like that again... _I'll kill you."_

Sanji knew it was an empty threat. Luffy was a lot of things, but cold-hearted wasn't one. He knew the ravenette didn't mean it, not truly, but the dark glare directed his way said otherwise.

"Yosh!" The blonde responded, fighting to keep his tone even, not wanting to betray his unease. "Of course Captain." Sanji lowered his head, taking in the chipped wood of the table, subject to numerous unspeakable cases of abuse. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean it."

For a moment, the younger's expression softened. "I know." Then grew serious once more. "Something's going on between you and Zoro, don't lie, I can tell." Luffy started, uncharacteristically dark and Sanji decided that he didn't like this side of his captain. "Your food has been tasting off for weeks now. I told him to deal with it, since I knew that he'd be calmer than you and he told me he would. I know he wasn't lying and I trust Zoro, I really do but.." The ravenette's hand wandered to his head, pulling gently on the black locks and likely missing his straw hat. "It seems like... his way of dealing with this, is by making you hate him."

" _Eh?_ But why would he do that?! As if I could _actually_ hate the idiot. That doesn't accomplish anything. Wait, the hell is he trying to accomplish anyways? What are you even making him _deal_ with?"

"I think he thinks it's be easier on you. And easier on him." The captain responded, ignoring his chef's questioning.

"You're being vague Luffy, and a cryptic you is always one to be afraid of. Just spit it out already. What do you mean?"

The 17 year old shrugged. "Its not my place to say, but do me a favor Sanji, and keep an eye on Zoro, okay? I have a weird feeling. Also I'm not asking. It the least you can do for the shit you pulled earlier, you understand?"

The worry in Luffy's voice was masked by his stupidly cheerful tone but the bonde heard it clear as day. Maybe even because it echoed the worry pounding in his own heart. And distantly, Sanji noted that he'd never seen his captain actually worried about anyone, and then, much closer to home, the thought was followed by a sensation of pure despair. 

"Wait!" He stood up, slamming his hands on the table and yelled before he could stop to think about what he was going to say. "A-are you and the shitty swordsman... _involved_ with one another?"

The other paused, staring with a blank, uncomprehending face, then laughed, instantly dissipating the dark atmosphere. "Shishishihihihi you really are dumb Sanji. Its kind of annoying. I know I never say it but, Zoro is kinda like my vice captain. We've traveled together the longest and like the rest of you he's Nakama. Your dumber than I thought if you didn't knwo that Zoro--"

"Enemy ship! Enemy ship! Marine ship approaching! Prepare to engage in battle." Usopp's voice rung from above deck and Sanji cursed under his breath. 

"Well, I gotta go! Come fight if you want, it might make you feel better!"

"Huh? Where are you going? Aren't we going to finish talking?" Judging by the snipers damn near bored tone, completely unusual, the marines were probably small fry and hardly a threat.

"Nah! I'm gonna go make sure that idiot of yours doesn't get himself killed just cause he's sad. And besides, I already said everything I wanted." For a moment, his face hardened. "I'm serious though, on the seas, we're all we have. You try to hurt my brother on purpose again just because _you're_ dealing with something and I really will kick your ass. I want all of you to be happy, not just some, okay?" 

In a flash Luffy was gone, voice suddenly chipper as he called out to the swordsman. "OIIIIIIIIIII ZORO! Come and fight with me! Lets beat some marine butt woohooo!"

-

Still somewhat shaken, Sanji sighed, contemplating if he should go out and fight, before deciding against it. There was was simply no point. Better to get dinner started since wasn't like they could eat rations all night. Besides, being in motion was the best possible thing to keep him from completely losing his shit. That many maybe another cigarette.

He glared forlornly at the stub between his fingers, before putting it out and tossing it in the trash, not bothering to turn around. 

"Oh my, that was a rather close call." 

Sanji whipped his head towards the voice, blue eye narrowed and lips bared in an unfriendly scowl, ready to tell off whoever dared to invaded his sanctuary. At the sight of Robin-- who was smiling sweetly, an extra limb clutching the thrown away nub in long delicate tan fingers-- the chef's expression softened considerably. 

"My apologies cook-san, I knocked, but it seems you'd been lost in thought."

The blonde sighed, running a hand through his hair, taking appreciation in being able to fully caress the silky golden locks. "No, its I who should apologize dearest Robin-chwan. I've been rather distracted." 

The woman tilted her head, a silent acknowledgement og the words but made no attempt to respond, instead pulling out a chair and taking a seat. "I'll be accompanying you this afternoon. There's a few things I'd like to discuss."

It was a statement, just as impossible and dangerous to object as the captains so Sanji forced a smile he didn't feel and rolled up his sleeves, pulling out a pan from the bottom cabinet.

"Why, of course Mellorine. Feel free to stay as long as you like. Its always a pleasure to engage in conversation with you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUYS GUESS WHAT???  
> THIS STORY HAS PLOT NOW  
> WOOHOO  
> THIS IS GONNA BE SO FUN.  
> There will be an OC of mine joining us in a few chapters. I hope you'll enjoy them!


	5. Red Cold River

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sanji mumbled, shoving a bright smile on his face and Robin had a fleeting thought that she'd never seen such a tormented expression coming from someone so young.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
> This is in Robin's POV and Sanji's POV  
> Please enjoy!

Robin wasn't one for romance. The ideal of attachment was something she both craved and loathed in equal proportions.

In some ways, the ships chef was the same as her. She knew, without knowing how that he'd once felt the love of a caring mother. It was clear in the he'd clutch himself when he thought no one was looking. In the soft, wishful smile that graced his lips as watched children play in the quiet, unsuspecting cities they visited. The cook said a lot, blabbering on about one thing or another, but it was moments like this-- moments of utter silence that spoke volumes. 

It was an attribute that Robin both recognized and respected, understanding completely the simple desire of wanting space. However, overtime she realized that despite his inner turmoil, Sanji was a creature that craved social interaction, who depended so insistently on on other's approval. Sanji was a man who wore his heart on his sleeve, unafraid because it had already vanquished, torn apart until only fragments remained-- and being the person she suspected he was-- the chef had long given up on trying to gather the falling pieces, lest he cut his precious hands. 

Chopper had been pestering the blonde for weeks on end about his cigarette intake and Robin couldn't help but find the exchanges extremely hilarious. Because it seemed that no one understood, or no one really _cared_ for that matter. Cigarettes were Sanji's salvation. A way out of whatever hell he'd experienced. He was indebted to the tiny sticks, probably more than he'd ever admit. _Cooking_ was the chef's addiction, the incessant need to provide, more than the nicotine could ever _dream_ to be. If cooking were a woman, he'd be utterly helpless against her antics, Icarus flying too close to sun, being viciously burned. 

Robin had thought the blonde to be someone who appreciated quiet, respected silence, but as she observed him moving through the kitchen, she had an epiphany and realized she'd be wrong this whole time. Sanji was _always_ talking, and if not with words, then through his meals. The flavors and spices sang ballads as they coated her tongue, sticky with savory tangs and tinged with overwhelming emotion. Cooking filled the void in blonde's heart, made him not feel as empty.

The sound of a mumbled curse brought the woman out of her reverie and she smiled slightly as the chef maneuvered deftly through the galley, hands expert multitaskers, but shoulders stiff and belatedly she realized that her presence was making the younger tense. 

"Please relax cook-san. I'm sure the marines will be dealt with swiftly." Robin stated, knowing that wasn't the reason for the tension but also not wanting to make anything worse.

Sanji snorted, sparing a glance back to flash Robin a haughty smirk. "Of course they will, shitty swordsman had better--" The teen's voice trailed off and his visible eye grew wide, sky blue expanse shining with a mix of shock and regret. 

"I mean-- they're not worth his time anyways. Our resident coward is more than enough, and I haven't even seen the small fry." Sanji mumbled, shoving a bright smile on his face and Robin had a fleeting thought that she'd never seen such a tormented expression coming from someone so young.

"Robin." The boy started and the darker woman raised a brow, impressed with his capability to call her by her name alone, no honorifics. "You're here because of Zoro right? Because of what I said to him?"

She inclined her head, choosing not respond aloud.

"Well," the chef continued, voice a faux calm, slowly beginning to set the table, plates stacked high with breads and meat, a wild assortment of meals. "You don't have to worry about it, Luffy already spoke to me and I already plan on apologizing, so there's no need to--"

_"Hana Hana no.... Clutch."_

Sanji glared at the woman, blue eyes enraged and golden locks displaced, neck exposed and full face revealed. "The hell is this?" He seethed, trying in vain to kick the manifested limbs away. He thrashed in his confines, fury riding off of his body in waves, the feeling of being restrained tugging on some dark memory better forgotten. 

"You know exactly what it is cook-san. Though I recommend that you stay still. After all, this attack _was_ designed to be lethal and if you aren't careful, that neck of yours might get snapped."

The chef stilled, eerily quiet and had she been a different woman, less confident in her abilities, Robin might've feared that she's killed the poor soul by accident. Sanji snorted, breaking her out of the gruesome thoughts, his chortle growing into a large laugh. 

"You know, I always thought that when this eventually happened, we'd be somewhere much more comfortable, like a bedroom. And preferably with you pinned beneath me." The words came out cold, and again, the archaeologist found herself impressed by the blonde's distrustful disposition. A walking contradiction, their chef was. 

As if he could read her mind, the teen flinched, clearly processing his own sentence.

"Well, cook-san, if its any consolation, I quite like you like this."

At that, Sanji let out a small huff, a sound Robin decided she enjoyed a lot. Much more genuine and heartfelt than the fake expressions he'd been sprouting all day. It was the sound of true youth, a a bit of happiness, two things that she'd been denied growing up. She knew that the cook was content on this ship, they all were, it was hard not to with a captain like Luffy. But she also knew that he could be so much happier. He could live a youth that was fulfilling, and with no one to stand in his way. No one to deny him.

So why...

"Why are you denying yourself?"

The blonde averted his eyes, the most he could to do avoid his gaze, considering his compromising position. "Dearest, whatever do you mean?" A loud thud followed the question, and a scream came not long after that. She imagined the blood that lathered the wood and wondered distantly if it would attract birds. Another yell sounded, and she stared knowingly above, heart twisting with a tiniest bit of sympathy. Because Sanji didn't seem to realize that it wasn't the marines who were screaming like that.

"Come outside cook-san. There's something I want you to see." She said, and released the teen from his hold, walking out of the kitchen and not bothering to turn around, trusting that he'd follow.

Soon the scent of smoke filled her nose and she smiled. So the pressure grew to be too much and Sanji chose to call on his savior. It was rather amusing. 

"It's a bloodbath out there. Must be more than we anticipated." He remarked offhandedly, noting, the same as her, the copious amounts of blood shrouding the area. 

"Yes, but that's not what I wanted you to pay attention to." She responded, waving her hand in disinterest. Marines garnered no worthwhile feelings from her other than rage. "Look at the battlefield. He's in pain cook-san, can't you see it? You hear it, don't you?"

With near comical timing, another yowl pierced the air, and like magic, Zoro appeared, slicing down opponents left and right. A gasp flew from Sanji's mouth and Robin nodded, staring at the swordsman with an appraising eye.

When Zoro fought, it was calm, suppressed rage and determination that drove him forward, a contained waterfall. With his blades, he crafted a deadly dance, cutting down all those in his way. It was unnerving how beautiful and graceful someone like Zoro could be. His katanas were no more than an extension of himself, another part of his body that he wielded with dangerous precision. He honorable, fair in his craft, and passionate about his goal. It was entertaining and enchanting to watch the swordsman fight, invoking a sense of imminent doom. He was always cool, calm, and collected. But above all, it was silent. An eerily quiet transaction, where one trade their life for death. Zoro was a harbinger of death, a guide into the next life and he played his role brilliantly. 

It wasn't anything like this.

The teen was speckled in blood, white shirt torn and green hair drenched in the red liquid. Luffy's straw hat rested in the lime green haramaki, safe from the ongoing violence. The metallic scent filled the air, as he stabbed and slashed the opposition with little hesitation, moving swiftly from one target to the next. The sun was beginning to sink in the horizon, until the teen was almost nothing but a demonic silhouette. He growled, and yelled, a guttural sound being dragged from the depths of his soul, scorching his throat and ripping harshly out of his mouth. His face was twisted in anguish, as if he'd been jabbed directly in his heart. 

Robin shot a glance to the chef, who was staring wide eyed with an equal mix of awe and fear.

"Do you see now?" She asked, startling the blonde. "Do you see what you did to him?"

"I- " Sanji started, cut off when Luffy's voice sounded above the rest.

"No fair Zoro! I want to fight the boss! Wait that _is_ the boss right?"

That's when she noticed the large man towering in front of the swordsman and narrowed her eyes, pondering how she'd missed him standing there. The green head flashed a rare smile, disturbing considering the blood splattered across his face, endearing in a way it shouldn't be.

"That's what you get for wasting time. And the hell if I know. He just came out of nowhere!" Zoro yelled back, sounding uncharacteristically giddy.

"EH! Really? Sugoi! Let me fight him Zoro please!" The ravenette begged, knocking down the marines with a stretched kick, only to be swamped by more. For supposed small fry, there were certainly a lot. 

"No way! Stop playing around and maybe you'll get to fight the bosses too. Who knows, they might even raise my bounty after this. If you're not careful it might end up even higher than yours!"

"Huh? Really? Okay then Zoro, let's switch!" From across the ship, a stretched hand landed on the back the green head's shirt and the swordsman noticeably stiffened. 

"Luffy what're you--"

"GOMU GOMU NOOOOO---"

"Luffy I swear to _god_ of you--" Zoro pleaded, sounding like he was begging rather than threatening and Robin cracked a sly grin. So far, she was the only one on the crew who'd managed to avoid being slung to maker knows where.

"Shihihihihihi you don't believe in god!" The captain quipped back with a large smile, and she heard Sanji let out a low whistle, clearly impressed with the uncharacteristically clever comeback. Quite an upgrade from "4 sword style."

And just like that, Zoro was airborne. Time seemed to slow as the two met in the middle, a loud sound echoing as the high-fived, landing on opposite sides of the deck.

"Take care of the rest for me okay? Captain's orders."

"You've been throwing that around a lot lately." The swordsman griped, no real bite to his words.

"So what?" Luffy asked, already beginning to run towards the marine. "I'm captain."

Zoro laughed and Robin blinked, momentarily enamored with sound. "Yosh!"

"Sanji-san. You shouldn't hate yourself. He's someone worth loving."

The blonde looked at her, mouth agape and he quickly fixed his expression. "How did you...."

She gazed at him for a moment, cerulean eyes meeting ice blue. She blinked slowly, turning back to the kitchen to grab her novel. "It's not an unfamiliar feeling. Thats all."

Robin wasn't one for romance. The ideal of attachment was something she both craved and loathed in equal proportions.

Especially considering that the one person she might have been willing to experience the mysterious phenomena known as love with, was utterly head over heels for their oblivious cook.

* * *

The battle didn't last much longer than that. 

Sanji was glad. Food was better fresh after all.

And he didn't want to think about how reckless Zoro had been. 

_"I'm gonna go make sure that idiot of yours doesn't get himself killed just cause he's sad."_

Sanji didn't want to admit that the words had worried him more than they should've. When the idiot marimo had faced off with the big guy, Sanji couldn't deny his rising worry. 

But it all turned out fine.

He let out a breath.

"OI!!!! CAN I EAT NOW! ITS BEEN FOREVER SINCE LUNCH!" 

Luffy barreled through the kitchen door where the blonde had been waiting for his inevitable arrival. He waved a hand towards the table, stacked high with different meals.

"Have at it. Wash your hands though first, and try not to spill blood everywhere. You're lucky I'm not making you take a shower."

"Yosh!" The boy exclaimed, rushing over to the sink.

"Food's in the galley, hurry on up or our black hole of a captain will eat your share!"

As if by magic, the rest of the crew bustled in, each washing their hands and taking a seat at the table, lively due to a nice victory. 

"We're going to the nearest island! We earned it!" Nami exclaimed and the entire crew cheered, raising their mugs in the air.

"YOSH! Good, I have something important to do!" The 17 year old exclaimed, and everyone ignored their captain, too caught up in the fervor of post battle.

Luffy laughed joyously as he recalled his fights, rivaled only by Usopp who spoke of how he took down 8,000 men all by himself with one shot from his new special tobacco attack.

Collectively, no one made a remark about Zoro's absence and Sanji had no clue whether to feel relieved or concerned. If anything, he was irritated, because maybe it was his imagination, but it felt like both Luffy and Robin were staring at him, shootign pointed glares his way.

 _"Just cause he's sad."_ The words rang in his head, loud and demanding attention. _"Don't you see, he's in pain."_

Abruptly, Sanji slammed his hands down on the table, quieting the conversation and apologized profusely. "Sorry." He said, smiling a bit. "A thought just crossed my mind is all."

He made his way to the kitchen, grabbing a plate and filling it with food, before going to his extra secret stash and grabbing the last bottle of sake they had, an expensive kind, but he didn't waste a second thought on it. It was the least the chef could do.

Sanji headed towards the training room, no doubt where the idiot marimo would be and raised a foot, kicking on the door so it rattled. "Oi! Open the door shitty swordsman, food's here."

After what felt an an eternity, the wooden barrier cracked open, revealing a head of fluffy green hair. Zoro glared at him through narrow eyes.

"So you had more sake after all?" The brute grunted out, not at all surprised. "Figures."

"Ruined whatever scheme you had did I?" The blonde asked, holding back a smirk. "If you must know, it came from my extra secret stash. The last bottle. And its the good stuff." He held the plate out, stomping down the urge to look away, when a hand yanked his wrist closer. Suddenly he was in the training room, door closed, and food out of his hand, placed gently on the floor. Zoro was staring at him with an intense expression.

Sanji thought he saw a flicker of despair but it wasgone before he could be sure. Something about the sight though made his walls crumble and he blurted out the words that had been on his mind since midday.

"I lied. I don't hate you."

At that, the swordsman snorted. "I know that much shit cook." His face sobered. "But... you might soon."

"Eh? What do you--" Sanji started to ask, but was interrupted.

"I want-- _need_ you to swear to me that above all else, we're Nakama. That you won't let it jeopardize the crew."

Someone about the words struck a chord with the chef and he recalled Usopp telling him the same thing the night before. 

_"You should talk to him. Tell him Sanji, because if you don't, it'll fester and eventually hurt this crew."_

He sighed. "Of course dumbass, as if I'd let something change that."

No sooner were the words out of his mouth, that he felt something press against his lips.

Warmth.

It course through his entire body.

It was as though he'd been cold his entire life was only just now experiencing this blessed heat. 

The kiss was chaste. Simple and quick, no more than a brush of lips but it tortured Sanji's mind in ways he couldn't even comprehend. When they finally parted, he felt dazed. His face was flushed but he couldn't stop staring at Zoro's tan skin painted a delicious red.

The swordsman took a step back, looking ridiculously awkward and scratched the back of his head, mussing the short green hear even further. 

"Tch, I'm not good with words, so if that wasn't enough I don't know what to say. No need to worry though. I'll get over it."

He watched as the 19 year old bent down, grabbing the plate and walked out of the room, glancing back at the other to say, "I'm gonna go eat with everyone one else now. Thanks for the food. And..sorry for, you know. Just once, I wanted to know what your lips felt like."

With that, the teen left, and Sanji felt himself slide to the floor, unsure what to make of it. Suddenly, everything made sense. That moment of closeness while they fought, Luffy and Robin, Usopp. All of it.

His face began to hurt and Sanji realized that he was smiling like an idiot. Like a stupid fucking idiot.

He touched his lips, finally comprehending what the hell just happened to him.

He was kissed!

He was _kissed._

By Zoro of all people. 

By the person he loved.

Zoro loved him.

_Holy shit._

This time, the elation was followed by familiar dread. Disgust welled inside him and he buried his head in his knees. 

_This is a good thing._ He told himself. _This is good._

If that was the case, then why did he feel so fucking horrible?

* * *

Luffy watched as Zoro entered the kitchen wearing his hat and smiled.

He liked sitting on the lambs head, because he could see more than anyone. But this was okay too, because he could see even better close up.

So he didn't miss the way his first mate clutched a bottle of sake when he supposedly drank all of it earlier.

He didn't miss the fact that it was a brand Sanji constantly boasted about, saying it was the best ever made in the entire world.

He didn't miss the way Zoro touched his lips, briefly staring down at his fingers with wonder, before digging in with the rest of them.

Luffy smiled. 

This was good. This was very good.

It was a step in the right direction.

Luffy liked sitting on the lambs head, because he could see more than anyone.

But Robin saw something he didn't notice.

Robin saw the thing Luffy missed.

She saw the look of hurt and confusion in the swordsman's gaze. She saw the glassy coloring of his silver eyes, the constant blinking and the eventual, hardened glare of determination.

She saw, and she understood. That the swordsman had tried. He'd tried and failed.

Robin went back to eating. 

She did what she could. It was no longer her business. _And besides._..she shot a glance over to the captain, who was stealing food off of Zoro's plate, arm snapping as it slid back in place.

Luffy had a habit of making the impossible possible, and if the young teen was satisfied with the way things were going then she had no real reason to not be content as well.

The woman shook her head, a small grin spreading.

She really wasn't one for romance. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ooooh next chapter is one I had in my head for a while.  
> Get excited!


	6. We could be fuckbuddies, except No

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nami raised a brow. "Okay, but why the paper bag?"
> 
> Zoro smirked. "Either to cover your face with or throw up in. Maybe both, I haven't decided."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let Zoro And Nami Be Really Good Friends 2k20  
> Seriously, I LOVE them as good friends, having their own banter and moments.
> 
> Mhm, mhm, here we have some Zoro and Nami interaction. Sanji'll pop in later chapters but have fun reading.
> 
> Nothing is designed to be ZoNa shipping material, but if you choose to see that way, it's all good.
> 
> Warning for minor flirtatious banter between Zoro and Nami.

"Want to tell me why I have to go with _you_ of all people?" 

"Want me to tell you how much money you'll owe me if you don't shut up?" Nami quipped back, fast in her delivery, but Zoro knew better. He saw the concern flash through he expression.

The Pirate Thief was worried and wanted to talk. He scoffed, of fucking course she did. 

After his conversations with both Luffy and Chopper, the swordsman really wasn't in the mood for any more meddling. It'd been weeks since he'd alledgedly confessed and things had _finally_ begun to return to normal between him and the shit cook.

"Ah, even when she's giving orders, she's a vision." Said shit-cook cooed, eye rounder than a saucer, sunlight reflecting just enough to catch a a patch of sea green and--

_Fuck._

Nothing had changed at all huh?

He caught Nami's gaze, not missing her knowing smirk and scowled, realizing that there was no way out of the impending conversation. 

"Now that I think about it.." The red head began, voice thick and dripping in false sweetness that instantly put the 19 year old on edge. "It might actually be better if you went with Sanji, don'tcha think?"

Zoro smiled.

"I see how it is. You should've just told me you were suicidal, _witch_. No need to provoke me, I'll _gladly_ murder you." He gripped his swords, fighting the urge to summon a real grin as he watched the girl laugh. Fucking seriously, their navigator was beyond insufferable.

It was probably why they were such good friends. Not that he'd ever admit it out loud, not in a thousand damn years.

Suddenly, there was a foot poised at his throat, dangerously hovering above his adam's apple. The sharp scent of spicxe and nicotine filled his nostrils and the swordsman glared at the culprit, who waited until they made eye contact, then purposefully blew a large path of smoke into his face.

Zoro refused to cough. Like hell.

"Who the hell do you think you're talking to Marimo?" The cook's voice was low, an undertone of threat layered beneath the calm words. "Because it couldn't have possibly been our dearest Nami-swan."

"Oi, don't get your panties all in a twist ero-cook. Jealous cause I'm stealing your precious witch red-head?" He smirked as he watched Sanji's brow twitch, silently laughing at the blonde's enraged expression. It filled him with a sense of relief. Maybe things _weren't_ back to normal-- they probably could never be-- but at least there was this. 

Zoro needed _someone_ to pit his strength against. If the dumb nosebleed-kun had insisted on a tense peace it would've drove the teen mad. Sanji was a walking power meter, something to help the 19 year old assess his progress. If he was gone, no doubt Zoro would stray.

And hell, in the end it was just bloody fucking fun to spar.

"Oh boys, please don't fight over me." Nami oozed, batting her thick lashes coyly and the green head turned away, letting a loose scowl befall his features. 

"If its for you, dearest Nami-swan, I would gladly fight anyone who dared to be blind to your beauty and greatness. You, who are a walking goddess, I willingly lay down my life. But alas, you are absolutely right. Why should I waste time on this idiot marimo with _you_ around to keep me company?" The cook replied, voice high-pitched and love-struck.

She promptly ignored him, turning away and quickly issuing out orders to everyone else. "Alright then, I gave you guys your allowances right? Splurg to your hearts content, you earned it. And don't worry about ship finances, I saved aside enough beri for that too. We can handle all the serious stuff tomorrow. Meet back here at midday!"

"Yosh!" They all responded, the swordsman only letting out non-committal grunt. 

"Alright you muscle bound idiot, you're with me, but first I have to change." The red-head started, heading in the direction of the town, as everyone else went their own ways, before pausing to wink over her shoulder. "What? You saying you _don't_ want to go out for drinks? Knowing you, you'd get there right before closing time. Its not gonna be added to your debt either, so you should take the deal while its hot. Going once, going twice--"

And if Zoro decided to shove his hands down his pockets, trailing behind the manipulative witch, it was only because he wanted to drown himself in as much liquor as possible.

* * *

The bar was bustling, crowded without any chance or promise of space, skin rubbing against skin, the stench of alcohol and sweat mingling in the air as hordes of patrons mingled below. Zoro grimaced as someone split a table in half, the rickety wood unable to support the shaky dancing on top of it and finally letting go of its last strands of life. Music blared loudly on unseen speakers, bodies writhing together as they moved.

Every time he walked into one of these places, he asked himself why the hell he was there.

The bartender slid him a freshly refilled cup and just like that, the swordsman's memory was effectively jogged.

"Lively, aren't they?" Nami asked offhandedly, her dark eyes scouring the crowd, observing, listening, not missing a beat. It was one of the many things that Zoro liked about her. She didn't half-ass anything, always making sure to follow through on whatever tasking she had before her. He realized it way back when on that dumbass cactus island. 

A light swat to the arm garnered his attention and he turned to see that dark gaze leveled at him, pert mouth tilted in a slight frown. "Didn't you hear me?"

Zoro grunted. "I don't know what you were expecting, its a bar. The people are always lively."

She huffed, crossing her arms childishly and pouted, earning a few sloppy whistles from somewhere in the masses. "You're no fun."

He smirked, taking another swig of the ale and relished the burning sensation as it slid down his throat, coating the inside with a pleasant tingle. "Sure I am. You just aren't worth the effort it'd take to get interested."

"Eh, interested? What do you m--" Zoro watched with an evil glee as her eyes trailed down his body before landing on his crotch, cheeks flushing a light pink. And then she started to laugh.

"EW. You pervert! Haha, I didn't know you had it in you to make a lewd joke. Guess I was wrong about you have a stick shoved up your ass." Her chocolate gaze sharpened and smile grew wicked, leaving the swordsman to wonder how literally no one could see the conniving witch for what she was. "But you'd probably like that, wouldn't you?"

Just once, he decided to concede defeat, mumbling a quiet, "touche" before giving his own smile in return.

"Sorry to interrupt." Came a voice, and the 19 year old grunted, lazily turning his head around to meet the purple gaze of the bartender. "I couldn't help but overhear you earlier conversation, about the lively townspeople?"

 _Yeah and likely everything after that too._ Zoro thought, though he didn't bother to comment.

"Oh yeah! What about it?" Nami asked, batting her eyes and placing her arms under her breasts, not-so-subtly enunciating her figure. Zoro could laugh and hell, he almost did. He wasn't sure how, but he could tell. Like Luffy, this guy wasn't the type to be swayed by bodily appearances alone. 

"There's going to be a party in the next few weeks. A huge celebration, revered by the people who live here. You should stay, if your interested that is." And then the pale-- stupidly good looking, though Zoro would never admit it-- motherfucker had the audacity to flash a boyish grin, eyes disappearing under a long silver bang, hair short and tapered off in the back."It'll be fun."

"We'll think about it." The red-head mused aloud, speaking before he could say anything, and her gaze grew thoughtful. "It's not like any of our idiot friends are going to complain."

 _Smart girl._ Not mentioning anyone by name, in the unfortunate, but sadly repetitive event that they'd end up targeted. Its not like he didn't mind a nice game of cat and mouse, but still....

He chugged the rest of the alcohol, feeling some of the liquid run down his chin and ignoring Nami's disgusted snort.

This place had good booze. It'd be a shame to leave too soon.

As soon as the swordsman put his mug down, it was like another was magically there, and the bartender gave a knowing smile. "My name is Akuma by the way. And welcome to Barci."

Zoro didn't respond, instead choosing to incline his head slightly. It was only as he brought the cup to his lips once more that he felt it and froze, flint glare fleecing the crowd. 

It was an ominous feeling. Not the full blooded rage or razor edge cool that could be associated with murderous intent, but it wasn't calm enough to taken as anything but a certain-to-keep threat. It put him on edge, hand instinctively itching for Wado. Slowly he made eye contact with a bright blue leer, every bit as dangerous as his own. The person-- man or woman-- Zoro could tell from this distance, had their face covered by a mop of black wavy hair, not unattractive if unnerving. It felt as though time was slowed, the swordsman able to see each and every sparkle of mischief in the stranger's eyes. They grinned, giving a small wave and in a flash, the moment was over, said stranger turning away, their dark aura vanishing into thin air. 

"The hell is wrong with you now? You've gone into your macho battle mode. Seriously relax, I'm not going to grill into you, if that's what has you all on edge. Consider it a favor."

At that, Zoro snorted, muscles unclenching and breath going back to its normal regulation. "A favor always cost something when you're in the mix witch. But I'm fine, I just--sensed something for a moment there. Everyone's staring...at you specifically." He added, doing what he could to sound unphased. And he sure as hell saw the smug smirk on the bartenders face. The hell did that look even mean?

"Well of course they are." Nami responded, grinning coyly. "I'm a vision."

She really was, especially tonight, clad in a short black mini dress with a low, swooping back and material that hugged every inch of her body. A studded barrette adorned her short hair, making it appear fuller. 

She was hot, and if Zoro didn't know _exactly_ how her personality was, he might've been tempted to approach her just like all the other poor saps. 

Not like he'd ever tell her that though.

Regardless, she seemed to read his thoughts. "What? Name one person _wouldn't_ want a piece of me."

He raised his mug in silent admission, grinning internally when she rolled her eyes.

"Yeah right, as if _you_ could pass this up." The girl stated, waving a hand over her body.

"Trust me, I can." The tan teen retorted, not missing a beat.

Nami leaned in, scooting closer until her breast rested against the swordsman's hand. "Even if I said it'd lower your debt?" She asked, a sultry lilt to her tone. "What about then?"

"Then I'd ask Akuma over there for a paper bag and give you the best fuck of your life."

Nami raised a brow. "Okay, but why the paper bag?"

Zoro smirked. "Either to cover your face with or throw up in. Maybe both, I haven't decided."

Akuma snorted quietly, oblivious to the red-head's playful glare.

"But hey, let me pay you back in advance with some intel you'll find interesting." The swordsman said, hoping to placate his friend. She looked at him, clearly curious and before he could convince-- more like _remind_ himself that it was a bad idea, he was already speaking.

"I kissed him. The shitty cook."

Out the million and one reactions he conceived, the deflated sigh he got was on the bottom of the list.

"I knew that already idiot. You kept making stupid love-sick expressions that one night a few weeks ago. So, how'd he react?"

Zoro shrugged. "I didn't stay long enough to find out. Not easy to kiss and stick around someone who says that love between two men is sick and then later proceeds to tell you he hates you, before revealing that he actually doesn't. Except you have no clue what to believe because he has this distant, hostile look in his eye but you say "I know" anyways because you care and want to comfort him even if he's being an ass. Hell, you even visited the doctor and asked if they could help you with this sickness of yours but they said no since you aren't actually ill. You then asked if things would be easier if you were a woman, and knowing the answer was yes, you practically beg your doctor--who's still a kid, mind you-- to make you forget. They tell you they can't do that and instead give you a key to all the booze. You drink yourself to oblivion. The next day you're rudely awakened with a kick to the face, and a fight that follows. But this fight isn't like the others. Its harsh and dangerous. But in the middle, there's this moment of closeness and you wonder if he feels it too. But then you realize he doesn't. And still, knowing all that, you kissed him."

The words poured out in one fell swoop, more than he planned to say, to ever admit, even to himself--especially to himself, let alone Nami. He smiled ruefully. "Now I'm not a cook witch, but that sounds like a recipe for disaster."

For once, she didn't seem to know what to say. And Zoro was honestly glad. He knew that for all her money grabbing, blackmailing tendencies, she wouldn't lord his suffering over his head. 

Wordlessly, the girl turned, gaining the bartenders attention. "Akuma dear, mind giving us a few more rounds please?" 

The swordsman grunted his approval, doing his best to ignore the growing ache in his chest, the one that had been growing for months now. The black void of loneliness that was sure to swallow him whole soon. 

"Hell must've froze over Nami, because I _actually_ agree with you."

He didn't miss her widening eyes and equally wide smile. One that made her look truly gorgeous, because it was real and genuine.

Zoro didn't blame her for being surprised.

After all, it was the first time he'd ever said her name. 

"Drinking competition?" She implored, eye brows raised and cheeks rosy.

He nodded solemnly. "Drinking competition." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short chapter.  
> School's back in and my classes are already a handful
> 
> Things'll get more interesting! Stay tuned, yeah? Its all starting to heat up.  
> Not sure if he's ever said Nami's name tbh. I can't remember. I'm sure he has though but lets pretend he didn't for context purposes.
> 
> Also, can you believe this was supposed to be 6 chapters? LOL


	7. Dinero's and Belis

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The voice was not Zoro's. It was deep, gravelly with a slight rasp that was a tale-tell sign of a chain smoker. It was fused with a similar arrogance as the swordsman, but it definitely wasn't Zoro. Never in a million fucking years would he call Nami kitty, not just because he knew she'd hate it-- condescending as the title was-- but it was fucking gross. They flirted but didn't resort so low as to use pet names, least of all something as degrading as kitty. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sanji's in here. Let's welcome our resident blonde.
> 
> This chapter has lyrics from the song Dinero by Trinidad Cardona, because I heard it and realized it kind fit Nami. More so if this was a modern AU but eh.
> 
> I'm setting you up guys, get excited.
> 
> Fighting, but its not my strong point so sorry about this, I think I did pretty good though!

_I'm with her rolling_  
_My heart is broken_

Zoro grunted, listening to the music as it wafted over him, downing his 6th drink. It wasn't enough to get him hammered, not nearly, but there was a nice burning sensation in his throat.

He snorted, letting the lyrics of the song process in his brain and shot a side-long glance over to Nami, who had just finished her 5th mug.

"What?" She asked, cheeks and the bridge of her nose a warm red. The swordsman smirked, signaling for his seventh drink and sticking his tongue out at the red-head's irritated huff, before lifting his finger up and making circular motions in the air, indicating the unseen music.

"This song. It suits you. Kinda scary, maybe it was some guy you flirted up in the past."

He watched in interest as she perked up, tilting her head to the side, a look of concentration overcoming her features.

_My money's stolen_  
_My shawty is so bad (But I'm ready to go buy)_  
_Anything that she likes_  
_Get whatever's on her mind_  
_Spending money overtime_

She gave him a toothy grin. "Hm, looks like you're right. I like this song. Clearly the girl he's talking about is sensible." 

Zoro rolled his eyes. "Right, or just another thieving witch who preys on hopeless romantics."

There was a pause, then they turned and looked at each other, wide smiles gracing their lips.

_"Sanji!"_

_"Shitty ero-cook!"_

Another moment of silence, as the two processed what the other said, and then they laughed, their voices mingling in pleasant cadence. 

_She take my dinero_  
_Take my dinero_  
_She take my dinero_  
_Take my dinero_

Nami scrunched her eyebrows in confusion, brown gaze growing foggy. "Dinero? What's that?"

He started in on his eighth drink, sweat forming on his face as the body heat in the bar increased. "'S'nother way to say beri. Don't ask me why, I have no clue. I heard it once from a guy I used to go pirate hunting with from time to time, on the occasions we ran into on another."

Damn perceptive woman, picking up on the subtle fondness in his tone that he couldn't quite purge.

"Ohhhh? Was this guy your gay awakening?"

"First off, stop being so damn perceptive, and second, hell no, its not like that. There was no gay awakening, mainly because the guy was to me like Johnny or Yusaku." He watched as Nami wrinkled her nose in distaste, clearly remembering the two buffoons who'd traveled with them to Cocoyashi Village.

The swordsman nodded, crossing his arms and satisfied to see that she understood the complete improbability of what she'd suggested. "So yeah, no. No 'gay awakening' as you put it." He shrugged carelessly at her curious expression. "I've never had that before, though I heard stories about it, from men and women alike. Still, it wasn't like I woke up one morning and said to myself, "I want some dick." There was-- I guess there was just an ever present thought of "I don't care." 

"You don't care?" 

Zoro nodded, knowing that it sounded weird and not sure how to explain it properly. "Its just like--" He paused, drinking his ninth mug-- "If I like someone, then that's it you know? Nothing else really matters, except what's in here," He pointed to his heart-- "and what's in here." He pointed to his head.

"Pure of heart and clear of mind, huh?" Nami asked, face fully flushed as she downed her either mug, eyes growing hazy. "Never pegged you to be into the straight-laced type."

The swordsman snorted, making sure his senses were sharp as he slouched down, spreading in legs and allowing his body to relax. "Hardly. I mean-- the cook's one of the most gutter-minded people we know. And as much as it pisses me off, I could care less."

There was a twinkle in her eye that he decided promptly he didn't like. The navigator leaned forward, speaking lowly, words coming out in a low rumble. "That's very contradictory of you Mr. Bushido."

Zoro scrunched his face, leaning back a fraction in revulsion, before making a quick grab to the drink on the counter. It was his tenth one, though at this point, they were hardly having a competition anymore. 

"You damn witch," The 19 year growled. "Don't call me that, with _that_ tone, I ain't her, you know. Maybe you forgot but hair's green. Plus I'm a man."

The red-head damn-near purred, smug expression beaming as if she were a cat who'd successfully cornered their prey. "Why, whatever do you mean Mr.Bushido? The only girl I know has black hair and I'm _very_ aware of what you are. Unless you're thinking of a certain blonde?" She made a face as if she were pondering a fact, before turning the full force of her mischievousness on the swordsman. "Though, I do understand the confusion. _He_ does seem pretty feminine, huh? So easy to bend over and break, isn't that right? But that pretty blonde isn't here tonight."

Nami smirked, batting her lashes seductively, and Zoro scowled, still trying to guess her game. "Since he isn't here to keep you company, I suppose I can be of _service_." Her voice trailed off into a whisper, imbued with thick honey sweetness. "It's going to cost you though."

Zoro shook his head, and cursed, not sure what to make of anything. "The hell are you on about ---OI!" He fought hard not to squirm under the scrutinizing glare, focused directly on his crotch, a look of disappointment flitting over his features before everything clicked. 

"Wait, were you trying to get me _hard?"_

The red-head shrugged, a sheepish grin on her face and Zoro reminded himself that Sanji would most definitely _not_ like it if the swordsman killed their navigator.

"What can I say? You said you liked them dirty-minded so I wanted to know if that was a universal kink or what. Guess its exclusive. Lucky guy."

"Wha--damn it, don't just twist my words you fucker!" The green head hissed, face flushing as he snatched the 11th mug from Akuma, was failing miserably in suppressing a smile. "Yeah, yeah, laugh it up jackass." He growled, telling himself that was not pouting like a sullen child.

"Oh cool it, you oaf." 

"I hate you."

"Hai, hai. I know." She replied complacently, placating the teen with two pats to the head, a warm smile are her lips. "That's why we'll talk about something you _do_ like. Like why do you even have feelings for the idiot anyways?"

And suddenly he was thirsty. Very thirsty. In every way imaginable.

"Tell me again why we're talking about this?"

"Simple. So you're debt won't have to face another night of exponentially rising."

This time, the bartender didn't even try to hide his laugh, head tossed back and eyes closed. 

"You know what?" Zoro asked, leaning on the counter to pin the other man with his most withering gaze, which clearly wasn't working. "I've decided I don't like you."

"You don't like anyone." Nami retorted, before backtracking. "Well, except for him."

"You're a despicable woman." He huffed, knowing that the fight was lost. The red-head always got her way.

"And you love me for it. Now spill." Her voice softened. "Seriously Zoro, it helps to talk about how you're feeling and why you have feelings for him, even though you'll hurt like hell first. Trust me, I know."

The 19 year old sighed. He most definitely had no choice but to concede defeat. "I know."

* * *

"Believe or not, you're right. The cook's fragile. Easy to break. It pisses me off."

"Why?" Nami asked, tone holding an edge and Zoro knew that she could relate to the feeling of being broken. "Do you think he's weak?"

"No, and that's why I'm pissed. He's strong. _Stupidly_ strong. I know that. We all do, except for him."

"Then just show him. Prove to him his strength."

"What the hell do you _think_ I've been doing?" Zoro seethed, slamming his fist down on the counter top, words rolling out in a suppressed growl. "Its not like I can just say, "Hey cook, you're strong" without the idiot taking it as some sort of provocation. Fighting him the only way to get the message across, but the illiterate son of a bitch clearly missed it."

"Easy Tiger." Nami soothed, raising a hand in silent defeat. "I see what you're saying. I didn't know that was a sore subject. Sorry."

At her apology, the swordsman let out a dark chuckle, feeling shame poke at his heart, bubbling in the pit of his stomach. He scratched the back of his head, looking the red-head in the eye. "I must really look like shit if you're apologizing."

He'd carry his gratification at hearing her give a genuine laugh with him to his grave. 

"Don't be so conceited Mr. Bushido." The red-head stated with a wink and a smirk. "I haven't told you yet what you'll have to do for that apology."

The agonized groan he let out was fake and they both knew it. 

"Don't be such a downer. If you're a good boy I'll let you off with a special treat."

"No thanks, keep it to yourself. Only God knows what that'll cost me."

Nami grinned, every bit the conniving witch she was, and stupidly he thought to himself: _gorgeous._

"Trust me God can only _imagine_ the plans I have concocted in this pretty little head of mine."

"That sounds promising. Care to share those _plans_ you've been con- _cock_ -ting, Kitty? Because I have a hunch that they're pretty _filthy."_

The voice was not Zoro's. It was deep, gravelly with a slight rasp that was a tale-tell sign of a chain smoker. It was fused with a similar arrogance as the swordsman, but it definitely wasn't Zoro. Never in a million fucking years would he call Nami kitty, not just because he knew she'd hate it-- condescending as the title was-- but it was fucking gross. They flirted but didn't resort so low as to use pet names, least of all something as degrading as _kitty._

Zoro made to move, ready to look the fucker in the eye and shove his foot down the man's ass but a look from the navigator stopped him. Her dark gaze was pointed, blazing with anger, but she gave a swordsman a small, imperceptible shake of her head. _Let me do this._ She was saying. _I'll let you know if you need to step in._

So he decided to relax, taking in the appearance of the man instead, noting the snobbish attire and plethora of jewels. 

Another traveler, though a single, lazy glance around the bar told him that the man's appearance was a normal occurrence, if a lack of reaction to the gaudy outfit was anything to go by.

"Oh my." The red-head started off coyly, leaning forward on the counter and peered up at Akuma, who was watching the situation unfold with mild amusement and something like disdain. Zoro came to the conclusion that _yes_ he in fact _did_ like the silver-haired male. "Akuma dear, did you hear something? I fear I might be going mad."

At this the bartender smiled widely, seeming entertained, his malice flowing off in waves, though not towards the navigator. In a way, the tan teen was reminded of Luffy, who had a tendency to look more intimidating by acting friendly, an oxymoron if the swordsman had ever seen one. "I'd say you've had one to many drinks tonight, my esteemed customer, but I too heard something amiss. Perhaps it was the wind?"

"Maybe so." She replied, hand inching down to hem of her black dress, revealing what Zoro recognized as her disassembled climatact, tucked safely in a thigh strap. "I hate to be a bother. But you wouldn't mind if I _shut the windows,_ now would you?"

And he wasn't one for the fancy coded talk, but he smiled, understanding Nami's asking for permission to knock the assholes into next fucking week. He was in for a surprise, this jackass, him an all seven of his guard-dogs, the ones that tried to blend into the crowd but failed even worse than Luffy would. Nami could drop this guy easy, Zoro knew that, but he wasn't sure if she noticed the others, and really didn't feel like hearing the red-head go off on a tangent if he stepped into her battle, simply because she wasn't aware of the odds. 

But it wasn't like he could just say that. Or he could, but then the previous secrecy would be pointless. They wanted to talk fancy, fine. He could do it too.

"Oi, what's this guy? The seventh one to approach you tonight? You've been on a roll." He let out a low chuckle, ignoring Nami's brief look of confusion. "Careful girlie, you're attracting attention."

He glanced at the rugged race standing above him, letting a drunken smile that was nowhere near real slip. "I don't think she's interested buddy."

Okay, so maybe not subtle, but it wasn't like he did subtle. And the man ignored him anyways.

"Bartender, think you pass me another one? What is it now? The eighth one? The ninth one? I've lost count." The swordsman gave a rakish grin, sure to shoot the snobbish idiot a smug glare, not bothering to let the glare he got in return phase him. "It seems I'm running your alcohol stores dry. That can lead to some pretty chaotic mishaps in the future. You're okay with that, right?"

Akuma let out a huff, shaking his head slowly, a smirk playing on his lips as he seemed to come to a conclusion. "Of course I am, do as you please." The pale teen replied, simultaneously answering both Zoro and Nami's questions at once as he slid the green head his fourteenth mug of ale. 

Satisfied, he sat back, signaling to Nami that she could take hold of the reins once more. He knew she understood now, and she knew he wouldn't interrupt unless she asked or was in real danger.

"Kitty was it? Careful what you say, kitten or not I still have claws." She all but purred, shooting the man a sly grin as she gazed at him through thick lashes. "You wouldn't want to get scratched." 

And just like that her staff was unsheathed, blade tip pointed at the mans throat, her stool having fallen to the ground and long legs planted in a steady stance. Zoro looked on in silent approval, noting that their late night training was paying off, slowly but surely. 

_Wait a second...._ The swordsman narrowed his eyes, re-evaluating the red-head's position. Her most dominate foot was tucked back for support in the event she got pushed-- just as he taught her. Her knees weren't bent but Zoro overlooked that, knowing it was a wardrobe issue, and unless the navigator wanted her underwear exposed, there was only so far she could squat. But it was her torso that drew his attention the most. It was turned towards him slightly, an odd angle to anyone who was an experienced fighter.

After a moment, he let out a scoff. _This woman._ Her body said she wanted him to interject, but her eyes screamed for him to stay back. "So damn complicated." He muttered.

"Oi, you damn idiot, you're interrupting me drowning myself in booze. Take the bullshit outside."

The man gazed at him with disdain, and Zoro was loathe to admit the man was handsome, not much older than himself, with a rugged, beat up face. A crooked nose signified a few fights-- won or loss, who knew? And when man smiled, the swordsman was ready to slice him in half, filled instantly with revulsion.

"My apologies. You're absolutely right. We'll be leaving now." 

Zoro decided then, there was no way in _hell_ he was letting Nami walk out with odds like this. 

He sat still, watching as the man turned around, not paying mind to the blade at his neck and walked out the bar, Nami beginning her slow descent after him. Through the crowd a hand appeared, reaching for the back of the red-head's dress, and before the swordsman could process the situation, he had the hand in his grasp, glaring daggers into the culprit.

"She's not interested. If you touch her, _omae wa korosu."_

Instead of running in fear, the guard dog idiot smiled, snatching his hand back. "What's the matter tough guy? I just wanted to make sure she gets to the door safely, thats all." The lackey smirked, having spotted Wado and looked back at Zoro, a mischievous glint in his eye. "Oh I see now. You were hoping to put your sword in her, eh? Well don't worry, we can take turns--"

Zoro snapped. 

In one smooth movement he stood up, hooking his boot and the leg of the barstool and flinging it in the lackey's face, grinning morbidly at the satisfying _crack._ He stomped on the man's face, ignoring his cries for mercy and distantly registered the sound of screaming an a gust of strong winds. A light pressure tapped his back and he didn't bother to turn, already knowing who it was.

"Idiot, the whole point was to kick their ass _outside_ the bar." The navigator stated, exasperation coloring her words, swimming under the thick layer of anger. He raised a brow as lackey number two went down with a strong kick to the face, eyes getting poked in by the girl's sharp heel. "What?" She asked, feeling his heavy gaze on her.

"When did you change clothes?" It was a valid question. Somehow, in the span of 3 minutes she'd managed to rid herself of the tight black dress, clad in a sleeveless black crop top and equally tight black shorts.

"We're being attacked and _that's_ what you want to know?" She sounded annoyed, but it wasn't Zoro's fault. One didn't just _change_ clothes in less time than it took to walk out of a building. He was always joking about the witch thing, but now...

Shit maybe he'd been on to something this whole time.

"Its called a pencil skirt you muscle bound idiot, I had our handyman fix it up for me so that I could take it off for combat purposes. I'm not that much of a ditz you know." She growled before planting her climatact in the ground and flipping up, kicking one man in the face and breaking the heel of her right shoe on another. With a hiss she slammed her left one on the floor at an angle, breaking the heel there too and mumbling about "robbing these men for all they were worth."

"Yeah, I know witch." Zoro responded, running to where the boss had fled, pulling out Kitetsu the 3rd, but left it in its sheath, instead hitting the man across his legs to drop him. 

"Heh, what is that thing just for show?" The boss asked, doing his best to sound unphased, those is wasn't hard as his green glare shone with amusement. It filled the swordsman with disgust. 

"You aren't worth the honor of being on the receiving end of my blade. It deserves to feast on better blood than yours." The 19 year old said, and raised his sheathed katana, bringing it down with all the force he could muster.

And saw from his peripheral as a man snuck behind Nami while she took out the lackeys with a sweeping blow, a bottle in hand. Metal, not glass, the kind that could give mild to severe concussions if the blow was dealt with enough force.

 _"Shit."_ He cursed, running and grabbing the red-head's wrist, pulling her towards him and twisting so her body was underneath his, growling as he felt the bottle strike the back of his head, vision going blank. 

Warm liquid ran down his face, and belatedly, he realized he was bleeding. The metallic taste filled his mouth and Zoro felt something break in him. Something that felt a lot like restraint.

"Tell me," He started, voice eerily calm. He sensed more than noticed as the bar went silent went the two words. " _Are you ready to die now?"_

He placed his hand on Wado, letting the blood-lust he'd kept inside leak out, but then the scent of smoke filled his nostrils, stalling the movement.

"MARIMOOOOOOOOOOOOO! WHAT THE _HELL_ ARE YOU DOING?"

Zoro didn't respond, and instead braced his body, knowing the dumbass blonde was being lead around by his dick and wasn't thinking clearly. If the swordsman dodged, Nami would be the one to get hit and if their shitty-cook injured her, he'd be miserable for god knew how long. 

It fucking _hurt._

He'd never taken one of the cook's kicks head on before, always doing whatever he could to lessen the momentum, but sitting there crouched on the floor, he couldn't do anything but let a grunt slip out as he ground his elbows on the wooden floor. He was sure a rib was broken, at the very least one, maybe two. 

"GET THE HELL OFF OF HER!"

He was ripped from on top of Nami, not because of the force behind next strike-- which was fucking _powerful--_ but because of the disgust, rage, and _fear_ that colored the blonde's voice.

Afraid? 

For what?

The swordsman glanced around the bar, noting the absence of people, who'd fled once blood had been spilled. Including the bastards from earlier. 

And then it clicked. What it must've looked like if Sanji hadn't seen the entire battle.

Nami's significant lack of clothing, Zoro being at bar, Nami underneath him. 

_Fuck._

He felt the front of his shirt get grabbed and felt a stupid sensation of pride. As far as the swordsman knew, he was the only one who riled up the cook enough to use his hands for something other than cooking. Twice now.

It was a ridiculous thing to take satisfaction from, but he couldn't help it.

"The hell are you smiling about eh? You think this shit is funny?"

Zoro didn't think he'd ever seen a colder blue.

He grinned wider.

"Some arrogant jackass made a pass on your _precious_ witch and unlike _someone,_ I was here to deal with it and so I did."

He pushed Sanji away, ignoring the blonde's shocked expression, dusting himself off and storming out. 

"NAMI-SWAN~~~~ HOW ARE YOU MELLORINE? ARE YOU OKAY, DEAREST?" Sanji sang, his voice floating in happy tones, and the 19 year old smirked, not needing to look behind him to know the cook was noodling around like an idiot.

Of course he was already forgotten.

Zoro let out a ragged laugh.

How the hell was he supposed to make the world remember him, make the Heavens _tremble_ at the mere mention of his name, if one single shitty cook couldn't even be bothered to remember?

_Pointless._

It was all starting to feel pointless.

* * *

"Sanji you _idiot!"_

The chef paused in his twirling to look at the navigator in her eyes, surprised not by the rage he found there-- but the fact that her raged was aimed at _him._

"What is it Nami-swan? Is something wrong?" He asked, fighting the urge to drop his eyes towards the cleavage that was practically screaming for attention. At the sight of her disheveled appearance, Sanji felt his frustration return. She clearly needed him, and he wasn't there to protect her.

_Useless._

"Go after him! Do it now!"

"I'm sorry dear, you want me to what now?" The blonde stated, not sure he heard right. The glare he got in return said otherwise.

"Go. After. Him. Right. _Now."_ Nami growled, pointing at the entrance door.

"Poor guy." Someone said, and thats when Sanji noticed the teen behind the counter. His hair was silver and eyes a vibrant purple. Those purple eyes felt like they were baring into his soul and instinctively, Sanji felt that he didn't like him. "He only took your kick because of her you know that right?" The silver-headed teen asked, voice condescending and the chef bristled.

"Are you trying to say it my sweetest Nami-swans fault that neanderthal got his a--"

"I'm saying it was your raging hormones." The bartender deadpanned, disgust flitting through his features. "You seem like the kind of guy who listens to his dick before anything else. If that _neanderthal_ had dodged your kick, who would've been in the line of fire?" Those purple orbs bored into him. "Do you _really_ think at that momentum you would've been able to stop?" 

"Leave Sanji." Nami said again, sounding tired. "Just go. Find him, okay? I'll stay here with Akuma and help clean up. He's not into me, so you can relax."

"But--" The chef started, until his navigator looked at him, her chocolate gaze steely.

"I wasn't asking."

Without another word, he turned and walked out of the building.

-

The night air was pleasant, and on any other occasion, Sanji might've taken the time to enjoy it. He thought back to Zoro's gaze, bright grey and fueled with anger.

_"Some arrogant jackass made a pass on your precious witch and unlike someone, I was here to deal with it and so I did."_

Something about the words bothered him. He didn't know if it was because of the words themselves or the way the swordsman said it, spitting them out like it was curse.

The town was lively for such a late night and Sanji wondered if anything was going on, a celebration of some sort. It'd been like this since they got there, and it was only getting more exciting.

He strolled past an alley, mentally tallying the places he'd already checked and wondering where to go next when a voice startled him. 

""S'not fair. S'not fair Kuina. He's fucking my head up. I can't even meditate anymore." Zoro mumbled and the blonde paused mid step, back-tracking to the source of the noise, that being the abandoned alleyway. 

Sanji stuck to the shadows, not wanting to interrupt yet, but caught a glimpse of Zoro sitting cross legged on the ground, Wado unsheathed and seated across his lap. 

"It's starting to feel like its all for nothing K. Like I should've admit defeat to Mihawk. But I know you and I wouldn't be in the same afterlife, if such a thing even exists."

He felt himself reaching out and stopped, knowing that it'd be rude to say something. The swordsman continued after a moment, and Sanji wasn't under any illusion. He knew the other could sense him.

"But I'll keep fighting Kuina. For everything I want." And with that Zoro sheathed his sword. sitting in silence for a moment before smiling softly, as if he could hear a reply.

Sanji figured that now was his time to enter. "So, does every swordsman have a conversation with their weapon?"

"I thought you were all about manners shit-cook. Its not nice to eavesdrop." The 19 year old laughed, the sound coming out dark.

"Right, whatever you say. Come on, lets go back to the ship."

They walked in silence, warm and welcoming. It was odd, considering the fight they'd just gotten into, but still it felt _right._

And that's what scared him the most.

"Hey, shitty cook." 

Sanji looked over and his breath stopped. Zoro was was staring at him, silver eyes dark, and more complacent than he'd ever seen them.

The wind blew, ruffling his green hair and they stood facing each other for what felt like an eternity.

"You're a pain the ass." The swordsman started, smirking at the chef's glare. "You frustrate me to no end, more than anyone else on this crew. I give, and I give, and I give, for every one of our Nakama, because they need me to. But there are some things I can't give up. Like my dreams." Silver eyes swiveled to him and a grin formed on Zoro's lips. "Or you."

A moment later, Sanji was on him, face red and tears stupidly close to spilling. Zoro's lips were rough, hard and devastatingly weakening. He gripped the short green locks with as much strength as he could, needing purchase. Needing _Zoro._

He spares a thought of how good it feels. Of right it is. Of how much Zoro needed _him,_ kissing back with a fervor that surprised the chef.

But then the voices came.

The voices came like they always did. They reminded him.

_"You need a woman Sanji. Remember that. A woman will one day give birth to an heir."_

_"Ha! As if any woman would want a failure like_ you _. You'd be better off with a man, perfect for a disgrace like you. He'll probably **ruin** you. And if he does, you'll deserve it all."_

Sanji broke the kiss, pushing the swordsman away. " _Get the HELL OFF ME!_ " He screamed, avoiding the shocked gaze that would most likely be waiting for him. He walked away, out of the alley and into civilization, where the townspeople were still partying. "It didn't mean anything." The blonde stated, not wanting to turn around. Not wanting the last of his fragile resolve to crumble. Looking at the smiling, joyful people, Sanji thought he could understand why villages like this one got pillaged by viscous pirates. They were so damn _happy_ that it was insulting. Like they were flaunting all the things they had that he'd never be privy to.

"I know." He heared Zoro respond and the resigned tone in which the words were said made him flinch.

 _"I give, and I give, and I give.."_ The swordsman had stated, and he was right. Sanji wondered what it was like, to always give. 

All he did was take. 

Take.

Take.

_Take._

And _use._

_But such is a Pirates Nature isn't it?_

"Come on idiot Marimo," Sanji started, pulling a cigarette and lighting it, taking in a deep drag before releasing it into the air-- the last of his hope that he could ever be anything but a failure. That he could maybe become something more, become a decent human being. "Follow me, or else the roads will move."

He felt Zoro fall into step beside him and it fucking _shouldn't_ be this way but he felt comforted. Safe. Welcome.

Sanji thought that his heart had been broken a long time ago. When he'd decided to gain love from a loveless family. When he later discovered his mother died.

But as they walked, step for step, perfectly in tandem, the blonde thought that he could hear a heart beginning to crack. 

Except he couldn't tell if it was from him or the swordsman. 

Maybe it was just the broken ribs he gave to the other.

He'd have to apologize for that at some point.

"I'm sorry!" The chef blurted.

For one thing. For everything.

Zoro shook his head. "Don't be."

 _Ah,_ Sanji thought, ignoring the silent tears sliding down the swordsman's face, eradicating the image from his brain and purging its existence. _I think I know whose heart it is now._

His family would be proud. He broke something precious to him. Something he'd risk his life for. He shattered it.

Just like **_they_** taught him to.

He wondered what Luffy would do if he knew.

Then Sanji wondered if he was ready to die.

He wasn't.

But then, who ever was?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well?  
> I'd really really appreciate a comment! This chapter was crazy for me. Please let me know your thoughts!


	8. Despicable

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Tell me Luffy, do you know what its like...to think you'll never be worthy of love?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this household we STAN Serious Luffy  
> If you like before reading this chapter, check out part of 5 of the series! Also called: Red-Headed Temptress.
> 
> Also, you should totally listen to "Despicable" by Grandson as you read this. Slowed or Anti-Nightcore is the best  
> Seriously, it fits.
> 
> https://youtu.be/V9e4aaB1ZIg
> 
> Or "Demons" by Jacob Lee
> 
> https://youtu.be/ri6cpYoOh-M
> 
> Put one of these babies on loop and get ready for the feels. Please enjoy!

"You _broke_ him!"

If it was any other day, at any other time, with any body else, Sanji would've fought back. He would've fought, and screamed. He would've denied it all, he'd turn a blind eye.

But seeing as it was today, right now, and with Luffy, his fucking Captain, Sanji realized that his options were severely limited. Choices to get out of the situation rather non-existent. 

So he resigned himself to getting punched in the face, feeling his body bend in an unnatural way and was grateful for the absurd thing that was his flexibility. 

"What did I tell you?"

Luffy wasn't yelling anymore, which was a very _very_ bad sign. 

"Sanji."

The blonde cracked open his swelling eye, already growing sticky with pus and regarded the teen in front of him. The raven head stood with arms crossed, gaze dark and expressive. The door to the galley was crooked, partially off its hinges and precariously hanging on for dear life.

He was sprawled on the kitchen floor, arms hooked on the top of the table chairs, a poor excuse for support.

The rest of the crew were all gathered around at the entrance of the galley, Nami’s shouts to end the commotion fading as she took in the sight before her. Their expressions varied, the most horrified being their ships doctor. The blonde gave a crooked smile, and spat out his bent cigarette, which somehow managed to stay in is mouth the entire time.

“Worried Chopper? Don’t be, the Cap’s going easy on me. That hit? Barely felt it.”

It had been 3 days since they landed at Barci. No one came back the second morning, and Zoro had disappeared after they arrived at the ship. Sanji didn't bother to follow, knowing the swordsman wouldn't leave. The rest of the crew showed up the next day, and Luffy took one look at his first mate, before rushing to the galley and punching him in the face.

“I told you not to hurt him.” Luffy said, slowly as if Sanji would miss it if he spoke too fast.

“On purpose. You told me not to hurt him on _purpose_.”

The silence was deafening. The raven head stalked to where Sanji was sitting and crouched low in front of him, black eyes blazing. 

“You’re telling me the greatest swordsman in the world is below deck looking as if he lost both his arms because of something that happened by _accident_?”

It was moments like this where the chef thought that he might hate his captain. 

Though fear would be a better, more accurate word.

Sitting on the floor, cowering away from the man that just hit him, Sanji was flung back in to _that_ place, the wooden floor suddenly feeling like stone and the eyes of his crew mates turned into his siblings.

He felt cornered. Stuck. But he wasn't the same kid that **_they_** beat up for sport. For a sickening kind of _fun._ He was stronger, a lot stronger.

He wasn't prey, not anymore.

Though he couldn't deny feeling as if he were a cornered animal.

And like the cornered animal he was, he lashed out.

"So _what_ if I hurt him? _What about me, huh? What about the pain_ I'm _feeling?_ " He practically hissed, not caring if he spit in Luffy's face. The 17 year old didn't so much as blink, though his glare grew cold. Colder than he'd ever seen it.

"Nakama don't hurt Nakama, Sanji. I told you that. We're _all_ we have. There's no one else." The teen grabbed him by his shirt collar, pulling him so that they were close. Close enough to share a kiss if he so inclined. Close enough for Sanji to see the depth of his Captain's rage.

"You want to know why I'm not out there _right now_ kicking Zoro's ass for hurting you?" Luffy growled, the words rolling in a low rumble, surprising the chef, because he hadn't know the raven head knew the partial source of his suffering. "It's because he doesn't _know_ that he's hurting you. And I can't say anything to him, that wouldn't make you feel like I was betraying your trust. And trust is important, because we're nakama."

It came out like a plea, and the blonde could _feel_ the helplessness in the words. It frightened him, the thought of his captain being helpless.

Sanji thought his heart might break all over again.

"Tell me Luffy, do you know what it's like...to think you'll never be worthy of love?"

The grip on his shirt loosened. before the teen let him go completely. "No." The raven head stated. "I don't know what it feels like. Those emotions are a mystery to me. But...i know people, who feel the same way as you."

He didn't know what to say. Didn't know if he _could_ speak. 

Luckily-- or maybe not-- he was saved the trouble of trying to pry his mouth open and allow words to escape.

"Oi, the hell is going on here? I sensed something hostile, more than usual." Zoro grumbled, blinking sleep out his eyes as he yawned. In a flash, Luffy was there, clutching fistfulls of the swordsman's shirt just as tightly-- if not more so-- than he did Sanji.

"Are you just gonna let him do this to you?" Luffy asked and this time, the chef could _taste_ the desperate plea. Just as clearly as if he put lemon instead of lime in a dish. 

Zoro didn't answer, eyes covered by the straw hat and in that moment they looked so similar and yet dissimilar to one another. As if the captain and first mate had switched.

"Please" Luffy growled, shaking the swordsman a little. "Help me out here. I don't know who's side I'm supposed to take."

"Then don't." Zoro said simply, as if it were that easy. "Don't take a side. That isn't your place."

The teen looked at him then, steel gaze penetrating. "Oi, don't we have shopping to do? Where's the witch?"

"Breakfast." Sanji muttered, feeling dazed. "I need to make breakfast."

The swordsman shrugged. "Find me when you're done. Let's go Luffy." He plucked the rubberman threw him over his shoulder, walking out the galley without another word.

The blonde sat in the empty kitchen, wondering what the _fuck_ just happened. _"Shit."_

-+-

Sanji would readily admit to being addicted to cooking.

The scent of spices as they filtered through the air, the sizzling of meat as it sat on the stove.

The feeling of the ocean breeze as it slid over his skin. 

If the personification of cooking were a woman, Sanji would fall to his knees and worship. Offer his soul at her shrine and his body to use as she willed.

He was a slave to cooking, mercilessly throwing himself into the craft, regardless of the screaming pain in his body or the growing aches in his hands. He would anything, if only to feel that high once more.

That satisfaction of being _full._

Sanji didn't think he'd ever experience that sensation again.

Because he was scared.

That if he ate, _really_ ate, then he'd never stop.

The nicotine helped, it curbed his appetite and stilled the rumblings of his stomach, but the blonde couldn't shake the nagging feeling that somewhere in the world the incarnate of cooking was glaring down gleefully on him.

After all, the deal he made was for him to experience that sensation once more, but it'd never happen.

Sanji thought that just this once, he didn't mind being in a such losing battle.

Cigarettes were his salvation and cooking was his addiction. He was a vassal for her whims, utterly whipped.

Sanji loved cooking more than he loved women.

Cooking was a goddess of another caliber, and she always came before anyone or anything else. The most gorgeous dame paled in comparison. 

So why?

Why was he setting his pot down on the cool ire, feet heading towards the door while his mind fed his body a useless lie of needing a cigarette. Why was he leaving the scent of spices as they filtered through the air, and the ocean breeze that slid over his skin?

Why did his gaze roam the deck, his brain claiming they searched for a pair of ice blue eyes while that _thing_ in his chest screamed in opposition. 

_His favorite color was blue, beautiful, cerulean blue, though in some part deep inside, his mind locked away the truth that green had taken precedence in his heart._

Zoro.

He abandoned his cooking for _Zoro_ of all people. 

And yet he wasn't surprised.

He was addicted to cooking, perceptive but uncaring to her manipulative ways. Yet the blonde set it aside for a swordsman.

Strange.

The things done for love.

Because that's why he was out here, right?

Why he stared at the door he'd heard Robins's voice float from, mingled with a certain marimo's with such concentration.

That's why he walking to said door, placing his ear next to the barrier in hopes of hearing more clearly.

Because he was in love. 

It was all for love that he couldn't have.

"You know..." And Sanji froze, because that was _Zoro's_ voice. "It would be you, if it weren't him."

"I know, Swordsman-san. It _has_ been rather apparent." Robin replied, words fused with amusement. "No need to feel apologetic."

"Y-you damn woman. You know what I mean." Zoro replied and the blonde imagined the 19 year old was blushing, face slowly adopting a bright red hue. It was something only their archaeologist could do.

The chef told himself that it wasn't jealousy he was feeling.

"Indeed," The older woman spoke. "But I must ask, seeing as you never answered the captain. Will you allow him to do this? Use you?"

The silence was suffocating.

"Yes." The swordsman whispered, the words low but strong and full of conviction.

"I see." Robin hummed. "And if this doesn't work out? What will you do then, come back to me?"

Zoro scoffed, and Sanji envisioned the male's indignant expression. "Of course not. You aren't someone that any sane person would take for granted in the way that I have. If...if he and I cannot come to terms, then I'll remain alone and focus once more on my dream. It's both the only and right thing to do. After all, you deserve better than me."

"And what, Sanji-san doesn't? Deserve better than you, I mean."

There was a long pause, and the blonde fought his urge to burst into the room. His heart was hammering in his chest and his mouth twitched for a smoke, his feet itching to run, to carry him into oblivion.

What would Zoro say? What did he _want_ Zoro to say?

Sanji wasn't sure anymore.

"No." The swordsman began, voice at a whisper. "He deserves much more than me, more than any half-assed life I could give him. Him, his precious All Blue, and all the women in the world. I can't give any that. It pisses me off. And still, you know he kissed me?" Zoro laughed and the chef didn't think he'd ever heard something so bitter he could taste it in the recesses of his throat. "He kissed me, and then said it meant nothing. I'm not delusional. But I think I'd be willing to do anything if it meant he'd kiss me like that again. Like he _wanted_ me."

"You're someone worthy of being loved, Roronoa Zoro, do not forget that. Or would you rather tell me my feelings are wrong?"

_It's not an unfamiliar feeling. Thats all._

Sanji couldn't breath.

That's what Robin had meant.

Fuck.

_Fuckfuckfuckfuck._

He really was scum.

"Believe what you want. But it doesn't mean much if he doesn't think the same."

Robin laughed, a real laugh, filled with mirth. "Hypocritical aren't we?"

"'S human nature."

"Indeed. Well, swordsman-san, I wish you well. And I hope you find yourself happiness."

"It's the shitty cook. Of course I'll be happy, no matter what happens."

Sanji ran.

As fast as his feet would carry him, and as far as he could possibly go.

 _Ha! As if any woman would want a failure like_ you _. You'd be better off with a man, perfect for a disgrace like you. He'll probably **ruin** you. And if he does, you'll deserve it all._

It seemed that for once they were wrong.

For the second time, he destroyed something so perfect.

He ruined Zoro and indirectly hurt Robin, who'd been nothing but kind to them.

Sanji fumbled for a cigarette, willing the smoke to permanently reside in his lungs, to soothe his nerves and still his shaking hands. 

He was home. Back in the galley, the kitchen.

He was with the spices, the ocean breeze, the smell of food.

He tried to forget what he just heard.

_It's the shitty cook. Of course I'll be happy, no matter what happens._

The smile wouldn't fade, _damn it all._

Why wouldn't it go away?

He didn't deserve it.

He didn't deserve to be happy.

Breakfast was a silent affair.

Sanji found that he didn't mind.

He also learned that he could no longer look their archaeologist in the eye. 

When it was over, Luffy zoomed off with Chopper, claiming that it was time to explore.

Robin offered to guard the the ship and Usopp left to get technological supplies.

Nami gave Sanji a sack of beri, shooting him a small grin.

"Ready?" Zoro asked, and he nodded, not trusting himself to speak.

He pretended not to see the consoling pat Nami gave the swordsman.

-+-

They were done shopping.

They hadn't spoken a word outside of "Here." "Hold this" and the occasional grunt.

"Oi, Marimo."

A grunt.

"Why...do you treat women the way you do?"

Zoro froze, turning towards him slowly. Sanji didn't think it was possible to look menacing covering in shopping bags, but apparently it was a thing.

"Huh, is this some sort of trick question, shit cook?"

"I'm not really in the mood for a fight. And besides," He blew out a ring of smoke, looking the swordsman up and down. "It's not like you could beat me in your current state anyways."

The tan teen scoffed. "Whatever." There was a pause, and Sanji watched as his expression grew thoughtful. "Try getting your ass beat 2,001 times by the same girl. You might change your tune."

"Been there, done that Marimo. In case you missed it, I'm never exactly surrounded by women. Quite the opposite in fact."

Zoro shook his head, letting out a low chuckle. "Fucking pervert. Its not like you're hard on the eyes. If you stopped chasing everything with breasts and a vagina you might get somewhere. But that's not what I meant anyways."

His face was burning, and he knew he wasn't anything but red because _fuck_ Zoro just indirectly called him attractive.

But the green head also said he was in love, so wouldn't attraction be a part of that? The hell was he getting all worked up for?

"Oi, shitty ero-cook, you better not be broken. Don't you know the roads move if you're not looking?"

"More like you'd get lost on a straight path." The chef snickered. "But no, elaborate. What'd you mean. I-- I really want to understand."

"I guess, her and I..were like you and the old man."

Sanji gasped at the implications. "You mean--shitty swordsman, how could you? Lay your hands on a woman--"

"The hell are you on about?" Zoro asked, looking at him like he'd grown another head. "I just meant that she kicked my ass constantly. Her and the old man probably would've gotten along."

There was a pause, then the 19 year old smirked, amusement in his grey eyes. "She'd have hated you though, at least at first. All that mellorine crap would've gotten you sliced."

"Hey! How would treating a lady like a lady get me sliced." Sanji demanded.

"Because of that shit right there." Zoro replied. "You have this idea already of what women should be like and you treat them that way, without ever getting to know them as a person. It's not fair."

"But--"

"Roronoa Zoro, I've been looking for you." A sultry voice cut through their conversation.

Calmly, Zoro put down each of the bags, taking care to set them lightly on the ground. He gripped his swords, bring out Kitestsu lll and Wado, the blades he used for those who were a real threat.

"You wanted to know why I treat women the way I do." 

The swordsman put on his bandanna, flashing a feral grin.

 _Demon._ They called him.

In moments like this, Sanji was always reminded why.

"Its because in my experience, women have always been the stronger gender, whether psychically or mentally. To treat them as anything other than such would be dishonorable."

 _You can't be_ that _weak. Doesn't that mean he's like a woman? Papa said that women were supposed to do whatever we men said because that was their job. And if Sanji's this weak, then he's like a woman._

The memory came back to him, but this time, it was different. He was still disgusted and afraid. But something had changed.

He could only think with an odd sense of clarity.

_Oh._

Zoro didn't believe that women were weak. So he treated them as he did anyone else, with his usual abrasive nature.

He knew that. He'd always known that.

But for some reason, the thought _stuck_.

_Women...aren't weak._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What'd you think?  
> Did I go overboard with Luffy?  
> I tried to keep him IC, hope I did well.  
> And how about that hint of ZoRobin?
> 
> Next few chapters are gonna be dialogue heavy. That plot thing I was talking about is gonna start coming into play.


	9. Accepting Feelings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I just want to love you." Zoro whispered, looking into those blue eyes that always managed to suck him in.  
> "Then love me." Sanji replied, the words coming out rushed.  
> He shook his head, finger digging into the dirt. "Why should I?"  
> The response was instant, and it hurt the swordsman more than anything else.  
> "Because I can't love myself."  
> Zoro felt his breath hitch and his heart break and wanted nothing more than to pledge is life to the blonde.  
> But he couldn't.  
> "That's not a good enough reason."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
> Welcome to the rollercoater. I wrote this chapter after a lot of consideration LOL. There was a lot to think about considering the mixed reception from last chapter.
> 
> I- uh toned down some things and turned up some things so hopefully this chapter will be more to everyone's taste.
> 
> Please enjoy!
> 
> not beta'd :)

Zoro, even with his limited interest in women, could admit that this one was beyond attractive.

Though it was her sharp flavor of danger that had him licking his lips and Kitetsu growling his grasp.

It was likely also the sensation that he'd met her somewhere before.

He felt strangely acquainted with her aura, but he'd remember if he ever met a woman such as her. 

A worthy opponent. 

"What's the matter Roronoa? Cat got your tongue?"

Her hair was dark and glossy, the side shaved off and _okay,fine--he_ could admit it was pretty badass. She wore a black leotard, which Zoro noted begrudgingly-- was practical and easy to move in. Nami would probably like something similar to it. Her skin was darker than his own, and green eyes peeked out from beneath black bangs.

He did what he could to ignore the sight of Sanji noodling around, muttering praises in his peripheral. 

"I don't make it a habit to have small talk with my prey." He sneered, shifting to a wider stance. "There's no point in speaking to lamb about to be slaughtered."

"Oi! Mosshead! You better not be threatening to kill her!" That _stupid_ fucking cook yelled, apparently snapped out of his overly fawning disposition. 

The woman smirked, her eyes glazed over with mirth and Zoro had between one blink and the next to block an over head kick. His arms raised above his head, blades crossed in the form of an "x", and he slid back a few feet, forcing clumps of grass out of their dirt homes.

The clash of steel against leather was harsh, the pressure it created and winds their collision manifested harsher still. He grunted under the unexpected vigor, then grinned. Bringing his wrists together, he made as if to slice the foot off, a move he never tried on the cook, in the unfortunate event that it worked.

He had no such reservations for his current opponent.

She lifted her leg, pulling it up and back before executing a side flip. She grinned up at him, then grabbed then swung low, as if to sweep his feet from under him. Accustomed to that kind of attack, he stepped back, flipping Wadou in his grasp and stabbing her into the ground. 

The woman smirked. "Close one, huh, swordsman?" And made for a retreat, until she fell back. Her face froze with confusion. "Wha--?"

Zoro smirked back, gesturing with his head to the spot where Wado was perched, and the black fabric that it had pinned to the grass along with it. "Very close." He said pleasantly. "It was almost your leg and I missed. Shame."

With a practiced flick he swung downwards at the same time she flipped away. Rather than crash down, his blade remained suspended in the air.

The clash of steel against leather was harsh, strong, though it was a different pair of shoes that Zoro was blocking. Tobacco filled his nose, and the smoke settled in his lungs. 

Familiar.

Home.

And standing in his way.

"The hell are you doing shitty cook?" He snarled, shoving Sanji's leg away from him. 

"You were going to kill her, weren't you Marimo?" The blonde whispered, lips working furiously over the cigarette. 

"So what if I was?" He wasn't, but then, the dumbass didn't need to know. 

"Then you should know I won't let you do that." The words were clipped, short and accompanied by an ice blue glare. For once, Zoro thought that he could peek at the blue abyss hidden under the cook's blonde fringe. 

And it was every bit as cold as the rest of him.

"Damn Ero-Cook, always being led around by your dick. This isn't time or the fucking place. She attacked _me_ or did you fucking forget? She wants a fight and so I'm going to give her one." He lifted Kitetsu lll, placing the sharpened edge at Sanji's neck. The chef only watched him, expression never wavering.

"Did you already erase our conversation from that breast filled mind? I'm fighting because that's what _she_ wants and I'm in no position to refuse." His eyes narrowed and he tilted his head, earrings grazing his skin. "If you stand in my way, I won't hesitate to cut you down."

They stayed like for god knew how long, _too_ long and Zoro's instincts were screaming at him. The fight could've-- _would've_ been done three times over by now. He _really_ didn't want to knock the cook out, but it didn't mean that he wouldn't. It'd be payback for the fucked ribs-- bruised, not broken, thankfully.

The silence was growing thick, suffocating, and just when he was ready to snap, Sanji's shoulder sagged. It was the only sign of defeat and the chef took a step back, though not before nailing him with a piercing glare. 

The one that always managed to lock Zoro in place.

Slowly the smiling face of the woman was revealed. She was sitting on the ground, cross-legged with an amused expression, casually twirling a long dagger in her hand, the movements smooth and graceful. 

"You're defending my honor? How sweet." She said, though Zoro couldn't tell who she was talking to. Couldn't care less. They made eye contact, and her lips parted into a wide smile. "You're nicer than the humors said, Roronoa. Though, from what I've been told, all your opponents have been men. Are a pair of breasts all it takes to make you go soft?" She chuckled, eyelashes fluttering and voice seductive. "Or should I say..." 

Zoro scoffed, leering dangerously. The sheer fucking _audacity_. "As if. Only two people have ever managed to defeat me. Only person has managed to defeat me more than once, and she was a woman. So don't worry about me being soft, I never hold back."

Sanji made a sound like choking and the swordsman spared a glance over, momentarily distracted by the blush creeping up the blonde's creamy skin. "D-did you just make an innuendo?" He sputtered, eyes wide and fingers reaching for a new cigarette.

Koshiro would be pissed. Because for all of 30 seconds, Zoro was completely enamored with the sight of their normally graceful chef fumbling around because of a sexual joke.

_Too cute._

He wrenched his head away, turning instead to glare at the woman, who was still sprawled casually on the ground, lying down now, rather than sitting.

"You're a funny one swordsman." She spoke, laughing quietly. "I rather like you. You're passionate. I can admire that." She stood up, dusting off her clothes. Wado tracked her every movement. "At ease. I don't wish to fight anymore. I'm satisfied."

And quicker than he could react--seriously-- his training was going to be _tripled_ after this-- she leaned against his chest, whispering something into his ear before jumping back and placing a decent amount of distance between them.

She turned to look at Sanji, who was back to dancing around like an idiot and pierced him with a withering glare, an ominous aura flaring that had the hairs on his neck standing at attention and his grip on Wado tightening. 

"The way you act is disgraceful. Disgusting. Men like you are the worst kind. The ones who think they can do and get away with anything."

Zoro's heart screamed at him to step in, but something in gut held him back. Maybe it was the way the woman spoke, calm but searching. Or maybe it was her stance, which was completely at ease. Mostly though, it was the words she breathed in his ear. A simple, "trust me." And for some reason...

He did.

He consoled himself with the knowledge that he could always kill her in things went south and it was the cook's shuttering expression that made him feel like it was time to step in.

"I'm afraid I don't understand mellorine. My only wish is to serve you. In my eyes, you are as a goddess."

The goddess looked down on his, flint green gaze commanding as she uttered two words. "Then kneel."

Zoro watched, rage pooling into his stomach as Sanji slowly lowered himself to the ground, bending on one knee and scuffing the fancy slacks that he was always pissing about. The sight made him sick, like it always did, to see the blonde put himself on the level women told him he should be.

Though in retrospect, the cook did the exact same thing, placing women on a pedestal they didn't ask for. 

The thought did make his anger fade any quicker.

"You did it." The woman noted, voice devoid of any emotion. "Tell me why."

"Because you told me to." Sanji replied. "And I had no choice but to obey. I will defend myself from a woman, but I refuse to fight one. However," --And cook's voice changed, growing darker, with a jagged edge he almost never used on a woman-- "considering your threat, complying was in my best interest. It was safer, for both my conscious and my morals."

"How so?" She probed, gaze, digging, searching, prying, as if she were close to an answer and all it to free it was one more push.

"Because," The blonde whispered, and Zoro wanted to step it, wanted to stop it _right fucking now_ because it sounded like it hurt. Like it was painful for Sanji to admit, whatever he was going to admit. It was like the teen who psychical feel the words being pulled from his throat, compelled by his love for women to answer, even when it was the last thing he wanted to do.

Zoro couldn't bear that. 

"If you had gone through with your threat and hurt him, I would've been forced to fight you." With each word, the chef seemed to shrink into himself. He sounded so unlike normal, that the swordsman wasn't sure he wanted to hear the rest. "If you had hurt the marimo, I might've been blinded enough to kill you." At that, Sanji's lips quirked in a dry smile. "Or try at least." He added belatedly.

Euphoria?

Or was it sadness?

Ecstasy?

Or melancholy?

What was it, this emotional building inside him? He felt like he might burst. He was distracted, so distracted, that he missed the woman's bright smile, her comforting pat the blonde's back, the small phrase of "You passed.", the way she disappeared soon after with a knowing glance in his direction. 

He snapped out of it, only when the words she'd said processed, their meaning settling and his brain in over-drive to decode it.

_"I see I'm not the only possessive one here. The aura you're giving off his quite menacing. And to think you looked at me as if_ I _were a threat that day. Clearly you're far more dangerous Roronoa."_

Ah, so that's what he was feeling.

Pure fucking _happiness._

And _rage._

A bubbling, _burning,_ rage.

He was pissed her for forcing Sanji beneath her, pissed at the chef for willingly put his life on the line, pissed at _himself_ for not noticing anything strange when it was his _own_ life that was being threatened.

All of his weapons put away, and bandanna once more wrapped around his arm, Zoro studied Sanji in silence. 

Beautiful. 

The cook had always been beautiful. 

-+-

_If asked, Zoro would claim to not have a favorite color. They were there, the same as him, equal and free, so what was the point of putting one above another?_

_It wasn't until he met Luffy, and joined him on the crew, that his world expanded and life exploded in various hues. His captain was the most misleading, a demon with smile bright enough to rival God, if such a God existed. Luffy dressed in red, and the scent of blood followed like a loyal pet. His onyx eyes shone, a black hole which took everything in and let nothing out, so all encompassing that even knowing you were going to sink, it was impossible to look away. The day Zoro joined their pirateless crew was the day he signed his life over to a true monster. He wondered why no one could see it but him. The darkness that resided in Monkey D.Luffy._

_Nami came next, with her vibrant hair and even louder personality. A thief with seduction tactics more obvious than most of the half-assed bounty hunters he'd met in his day. He didn't trust her, there was something sinister and vengeful that lurked in her too-perceptive gaze. Something filled with wrath, a gaze not unlike his own. If he were a different person, borne into a different body and experienced the chance encounter of meeting Pirate Hunter Roronoa Zoro, he wouldn't trust him. And if he wouldn't trust himself, then there was no way to trust someone of the same cloth._ _He couldn't deny that liked her, though. He liked her a lot. She was smart, and while not combat efficient, proved to be capable in other ways. They'd be lost without her, literally._ _Not that he'd ever admit it, but he didn't think he could survive anymore without that bright orange flame to guide him on his path, even if she charged interest every step of the way._

_Usopp was another story. Filled with browns and tans that reminded Zoro of nature. Of his long nights spend in forests, scavenging, hunting, and creating. Usopp proved to all that, though it seemed like the kid hadn't realized it yet. Resourceful, determined to make something from nothing. A liar who wove intricate stories so outrageous that only someone like Luffy could make them come true. A steady aura, despite his fluctuating bravery and constant cowardice. Usopp was an honorable man, and Zoro couldn't wait to tell him, when the time was right._

_Lulled into a calm by their sniper's neutral colors, going to the Baratie was like getting slashed across the face with rays of the sun. It wasn't until much later, that he realized the sun paled in comparison to those silky golden locks. A pretty boy, who's introduction to Zoro was that of holding a marine official by the throat spewing some crap about cooking. He didn't hear. His eyes were locked on the strands of red sliding down strong, fair skinned fingers. The way those thin, pink lips worked skillfully around an equally thin cigarette. Sanji, the blonde's name was and from the moment they met, Zoro could see right through him. It wasn't that his happiness was faked, but below it resided a burning anger and aching fear. If Zoro was ever asked how he knew, the only semblance of an answer that he'd be able to give was "the idiot cook always wears black". A dark hue that hid everything from sight with it's opaqueness._

_When Sanji left, deciding to travel with them, Zoro thought he'd see the hurt disappear, or at the very least fade. For some reason, it didn't. And that's when he realized the scars were far deeper than he'd originally guessed. He touched his chest, running his fingers down the gnarled gash Mihawk gave him and wondered if Sanji's scars were on his back. He wondered what color they were._

_-_

_It was during their time in Arlong Park that Zoro realized he did trust Nami after all. He threw himself into he sea, arms bound and body in pain, doing nothing but flashing the red-head with a snide smirk. He sank to the ocean floor, not bothering to spare a thought for when she'd come, because he knew it'd happen eventually._

_It hurt like a bitch, being slammed onto the concrete, but when he saw the relief in her gaze, coupled with the determination of someone who was still fighting, Zoro decided that he liked the color orange on her. It was eerily fitting, in the same way that Luffy's red vest seemed to tell the story of bloodshed to come. Or how Sanji's hair was a reminder that the sun would shine on them again. That there was no need to fear the cold or the dark, as he'd always be there to warm them up with meals from the heart._

_And that was something Zoro realized._

_In his mind, in the seclusion of his thoughts, it was damn near impossible to insult their chef. There wasn't anything he could think that wouldn't be followed by a half-assed rebuttal._

_"He's such a fucking pervert." "But he's kind as well, maybe too kind." "He's practically a work-aholic, the dumbass lives in the kitchen." "And yet he never complains, even when its clear he's fucking exhausted." "He treats women like they're so much better than him, like they have the right to degrade him. As if they're delicate flowers." "But maybe...Kuina would be alive."_

_It annoyed the swordsman. He'd never met someone so selfless, someone who always gave. For a long time, Zoro did things for himself and only himself, but meeting Luffy and watching Sanji made him reconsider. What it would feel like to be apart of a crew. A bit late in the game, seeing as he'd put his life on the line multiple times but shit happens._

_The emotions that Sanji filled him with were complicated and yet startlingly simple._

_"You like him doofus." Nami scoffed, hitting him on the head as they sat drinking on Cactus Island, Zoro doing his best to ignore both his irritation with the cook, and foreboding sensation that something was wrong._

_Zoro snorted. "Me? Like him? Not likely."_

_She didn't believe him. "Uh-huh. And that's why you're scowling more than normal, shooting glances at him over your shoulder, and ruining that almost attractive mug of yours." Her eyes twinkled and she took another huge swig, causing the people around them to burst into cacophonous celebration. "If it bothers you so much, forfeit the match and rest up. You'll need the energy to for later." She winked, grinning sloppily at the multiple wolf whistles. Zoro groaned, hitting his head on the table to hide his smirk. They were likely the only two in their group who even realized that something was amiss._

_He wondered how much she'd managed to steal. Not that it mattered, its not like they were on a time-limit. He planned on killing all of them, shitty ass Baroque Works._

_-_

_It wasn't until they began their new adventure with Vivi that colors crossed his mind again. This time it was blue. Electric blue. A vibrant shade, and Zoro noticed how much it contrasted with Sanji's sea blue gaze._

_The longer they traveled with the Alabastian Princess, the more he noted the different things in his life that were blue, and how, inevitably, they led back to the cook._

_And then they met Robin, and the swordsman was forced to admit that he had an infatuation with the color._

_Blue._

_Blue._

_Blue._

_It was fucking everywhere._

_Zoro was starting to hate the sky, and he could swear that it was mocking him, the sun shining down a constant reminder of the blonde's golden hair._

_Robin noticed, she knew, and before long they shared they night watch together, or she'd help him adjust his penmanship. One late night, their shoulders brushed, and the feeling wasn't nearly as unpleasant as he thought it'd be--and he'd thought about it._

_Her eyes were different from the cook. Sharp and_ _piercing. She looked into his soul and ran her fingers through his hair, she whispered in his ear and told him the stories of her travels._

_He loved it, but the nagging feeling that something was missing filled his heart and flooded his body, making his movements tense. Zoro was embarrassed. He apologized, having never done anything even remotely similar to relationship before, not even understanding what the hell was going on. His eyes kept shifting to the galley, the fucking kitchen, and he couldn't stop wishing that the cook was there. With him. Robin followed his eyes, and when she saw where he was looking she laughed, a tinkling sound._

_"I see." She told him, a smile on her face, but Zoro noticed that her blue was different now, colder and distant. "You really love him don't you?"_

_The swordsman panicked. Love? The Shitty Cook? No fucking way. Hell no. It wasn't possible. Unbidden and unwanted his mind screamed, "fuck you." and flashed him with memories of rare occasions where he got the blonde to smile at him, the real one._

_He suddenly felt very alone, and very scared. He looked at the woman and reached out, before stopping himself, too frazzled to feel shame for his childish behavior. "B-but--you-- I-- how?" He struggled to talked, to get it out._

_Robin only smiled. "It's not impossible to be in love with more than one person swordsman-san." Swordsman-san. No longer Zoro, like she'd been calling him the last few weeks, whenever they were alone._

_They were sitting side by side and yet the gap between them felt huge, an uncrossable gorge._

_Even still, he wished for the chef._

_-_

_Zoro was in love with Sanji._

_Fuck._

_Of course he was in love._

_Damn shitty cook._

_If anyone would bother to ask, Zoro would admit that blue was his favorite color. They were there, the same as him, equal and free, so there was really no point in putting one above the other._

_But hell, Sanji was always lowering himself to accommodate everyone's needs. It would hurt to put him on a pedestal, just this once, even if it was only in Zoro's mind._

_-_

_Sanji didn't love him._

_Sanji hated him._

_Hated him enough to wanted to have starved._

_But he knew that already._

_He knew._

_He did._

_So why did it hurt so much?_

_Zoro sat in the training room, clawing at his chest. The scar from Mihawk began to bleed._

_It was oddly satisfying._

_-+-_

"Oi! Marimo!" The teen blinked, brought out of his stupor. Sanji was standing in front of him, leaning in close, and a smile split his face when he realized Zoro was back in the present. "Holy shit. fucking _finally_ , I thought the moss in your head had grown so much that it was blocking your ears."

He didn't respond, still coming up with the words he wanted to say, trying to decide how he should state it.

After a moment of hesitation, he kicked his leg out, startling the blonde and causing him to trip. The swordsman, tackled him to the floor, burying his hands in that golden hair and protecting it from the ground. They landed in a tangle of limbs, the taste of tobacco almost sickeningly acute.

Zoro wanted to kiss him. He wanted to smash their lips together and _devour_ their chef. He just knew, without knowing how, that Sanji tasted a thousand times better his cooking, and that was saying a fucking lot. 

But like any thought that involved the chef in even a remotely romantic situation he heard the voices, screaming at him to stop.

"It's _sick. It's wrong. Can't you see that?_ _Love between men shouldn't even exist in the first place."_

That voice, it berated him days on end, denying Zoro of even his fantasies. He could no longer _dream_ without feeling a measure of shame when he woke up.

So he he didn't kiss Sanji, he couldn't even if the body under him was warm and welcoming and the blonde was staring with those unreadable blue eyes and silky locks that put the sky and sun to shame. Instead, he bent down slowly, feeling Sanji tense, and pressed their foreheads together, letting out a slow breath he hadn't known he'd been holding.

"So tell me, am I the sick one still, for really wishing that we could kiss?" Zoro murmured, unable to keep the bitterness from his voice. "Or are you, for allowing yourself to be pinned beneath me?"

Those blue eyes widened, and that lithe body began to thrash, elbows and knees banging into his sore ribs and Zoro flinched, doing what he could to stop moving.

"Y-you were listening!" Sanji screeched, and the sight would've been cute if not for the actual desperation lurking in the expression. "How much did you hear? _How much???"_

Like most things that followed an affectionate thought of the blonde, Zoro felt his anger rise from a simmer to a boil, letting it spill over for the first time since all this shit went down. 

He locked his body in place, trapping the cook and growled, pissed as hell. "I heard enough. That I'm _sick._ I shouldn't exist. I went to our fucking _doctor_ to ask if I could take some medicine, and he-- the fucking _kid_ \-- gave me the keys to the alcohol storage and told me that getting over my feelings for you was basically pointless. We get in a petty ass fight the nest day and you tell me you hate me."

Saying the words made his voice crack and he stopped to take a breath. "You said you hated me. And then we kissed and that was it. Except it wasn't. A month later I go to the bar with Nami and you attack me, when I was only trying to protect her. You follow me when I leave, and then you-- you kiss me like it _meant_ something and I can't get the way you taste out of my mind."

He ran his thumb over the edge of Sanji's lips, knowing his pupils were probably blown wide and not caring. "I think about it, you know. I think about it all the time. And some days, I think I actually have a chance but then you go and make _that_ face" He gestured loosely to the blonde's contorted expression. "You make that face, full of pain and disgust and it hurts because I don't know what to do and then I realized it wasn't aimed at me, but yourself, and it hurt even worse because that means I really _can't_ help you. What a useless excuse for a first mate right?"

Sanji scoffed, face gaving slowing turned crimson, the longer Zoro's rant went on. "Since when have you been first mate?"

"I just want to love you." Zoro whispered, looking into those blue eyes that always managed to suck him in.

The chef didn't say anything, and he thought that he might've said it too quietly, but response came, breaking him out of his thoughts.

"Then love me." Sanji replied, the words coming out rushed.

He shook his head, finger digging into the dirt. "Why should I?"

The answer was instant, and it hurt the swordsman more than anything else.

"Because I can't love myself."

Zoro felt his breath hitch and his heart break and wanted nothing more than to pledge is life to the blonde.

But he couldn't.

Not yet.

"That's not a good enough reason."

And shit.

_Fuck._

At his words, Sanji wilted, expressive eyes locking away all emotion. 

"I'm not good enough, is that it?" The chef laughed, sounding like broken glass. "I should've let her kill me."

Zoro didn't like that tone. He couldn't stand it.

He fucking hated it, the way Sanji acted, as if there weren't people to take care of him. He hated the voices in his head that told him loving the blonde was pointless and it'd never go anywhere. He detested the part of himself that believed it. That part of him was weak, and nothing but a quitter. Fucking fine, maybe the cook didn't love him, but it didn't have to stay that way. And before they could even take any steps forward, Sanji would need to face whatever the hell was chasing him. That was what pissed him off the most. That Sanji was running, when he didn't have to anymore, when he had people to help.

"You'd like that wouldn't you." Zoro sneered, letting all the anger he held seep out, crashing over his senses in one huge wave. "You _want_ to fucking die, huh? To just end your miserable fucking existence. So you finally stop running away with those stupidly long legs of yours."

Sanji was seething but the swordsman could care less. He was going to help, and this was the only thing he could think to do. An angry cook was a good one, a hell of a lot more preferable to the sad one.

"Fuck you. And I mean that in every damn way you can think of. Because I wanna kill you so fucking bad right now, I really do. But I won't. I won't. I'm gonna let you suffer. Make you _live._ I'm gonna help you face all these shitty problems of yours no matter who we have to fight. I'm not gonna sit and let you wallow alone, especially when you have a boat of people who _care._ Who love you."

His voice dropped to hushed, and he relaxed his body, relishing the warmth emanating off the other. "You're not alone, because I love you. I'm not saying you have to feel the same. I'm not saying to have to accept me. Just that we're Nakama remember? Its not just you anymore. It hasn't been for a long time."

He fell silent, feeling sweat trickle down his back and blood rush to his face. He buried his head in Sanji's shoulders, not knowing if he should get up and leave or stay and cherish the last few moments he'd have being so close to the chef like this. The body beneath him began shaking and he tensed, thinking it was rage, until the chef laughed, his voice ringing through the forest-like area.

"That was almost romantic Marimo. Keep that up and it just might work."

Zoro didn't think he'd ever move faster in his life. He gripped Sanji's cheeks in his hand, staring deep into that blue eyes, which was more open than he'd ever seen it. "Did you mean that? You want me to start spewing romantic shit, is that it?" The tan teen nodded. "Yeah? Yeah, okay. I can do that. I think."

He leaned down, earrings brushing Sanji's ear as he tilted his head, whispering. "You know. I can't do it. I can't become the strongest swordsman, can't help Luffy become the Pirate King, can't do any of it." He rubbed his face against the cook's, hoping he wasn't pushing his luck. "Not if you aren't by my side. I just need you here. As friends, enemies, Nakama, it doesn't matter, I'd kick your ass anyways. As long as you're here, and not locked in those dark thoughts. Okay, _Sanji?"_

And then Zoro went flying backwards, a well placed kick on his ribs-- not the injured ones, he was pleased to note and not a hard kick either. He let his body roll, nose wrinkling at the thought of the bath he'd have to take later.

"Y-ou idiot!" Sanji squeaked, standing up and pointing an accusatory finger at the swordsman. "Don't just go saying my name like that!!!"

The 19 year old sat up, crossing his legs and yawned; it was long overdue for his nap. "You saying you don't want me to call you by your name again?" 

The chef froze, mouth open and golden hair frayed, the sun catching it at the right angle and making it glow. "I--"

Zoro smirked. "So you _do_ want me to call you buy you're name?" He shrugged. "I can do that. Now that I think about it..." He trailed off, and looked away. "Nah, never mind Sanji. Grab the bags. We should've been back at the ship by now."

He stood, and walked past the blonde, to the discarded groceries and wondered about the woman from earlier. She was startlingly familiar, and what she had said to him before leaving....

_"I see I'm not the only possessive one here. The aura you're giving off his quite menacing. And to think you looked at me as if_ I _were a threat that day. Clearly you're far more dangerous Roronoa."_

That day.

As if they'd seen each other recently. He thought about her aura, and her eyes. The black hair and sense of danger.

He remembered the man at the bar. The one with blue eyes.

Who stared daggers at him, with that sinister smile. The knowing smirk that the bartender cracked right after. The reference to being possessive.

He remembered it all, one after another.

And the craziest fucking idea filled his head. 

But... _no way._ He'd seen a lot of insane shit. But this might actually cause his head to explode.

"And of course you aren't listening..dumbass." Sanji's voice sounded, causing Zoro to shake off his thoughts.

"What was that shitty-cook?" He demanded, pretending not to be affected by the disappointment he watched flood those ocean blue eyes.

"I'm sorry Zoro. For treating you like shit for so long. For saying things I didn't mean, and stomping on your feelings. I let my own past blind me to the future and I destroyed the balance of our crew. Do you think you could--gmhmfdo"

Zoro, in a brilliant moment of _fuck it_ pulled Sanji close to him, crushing the lithe figure against his own in a suffocating embrace. Somehow, the cook still managed to smell like whatever expensive cologne he wore. 

"Just apologize to the crew. And Robin, for over hearing that conversation."

"You know about that???"

The swordsman snorted. "'Course I do."

The blonde was silent in his grasp. "....And what about you."

"Nah, you don't have to. Besides, I've already forgiven you Sanji, so its not a big deal." Zoro grinned wickedly. "I would like a meal though. And top shelf sake."

Sanji pulled away, not saying a word, and turned, walking off. 

He followed silently, hefting the bags into his arms. After a few feet and a lit cigarette, the blonde looked back at him, a smile happy smile stretching his lips. "Sure thing Zoro, I'm going to wow the hell out of your unrefined tongue."

"Looking forward to it." He responded candidly, feeling an emotion a lot like joy bubble up in his chest.

He couldn't help it. He tossed his head back and whopped into the air, a _so there_ to the sky that mocked him. He wanted to pull Wado out of her sheath an run around with her blade in the air like an idiot. 

Sanji was staring at him in confusion, precious hands protected by deep pockets, suit pants faded and suit jacket wrinkled. 

It was the most gorgeous he'd ever seen the blonde. 

"What the hell was all that about?"

Zoro grinned, flicking Sanji on the forehead-- a challenging task indeed with the shit load of bags he was carrying. "That was the sound of progress Curlybrow. Today we made progress." He walked ahead of the chef, leaving him behind and smirking at the bewildered expression.

There were a few moments of silence then, "YOU'RE GOING THE WRONG WAY MARIMO!!!!!"

"I TOLD YOU THE ROADS MOVE!!!!"

-+-

They were almost at the ship.

They hadn't spoken much since unloading all their vices a few hours before.

"Hey, cook."

A raised brow.

"Did you know, that on land, mostly in dojos and stuff, there's this leather bag that gets filled with sand and other random shit." At Sanji's shaking head he continued. "Yeah, well that's a thing, and you call it a punching bag, because you, you know, punch it. Though kicks work too." Zoro shrugged. "Anything works really."

"Where are you going with this?" The cook questioned, laced with curiosity and suspicion.

"I knew you were feeling pent up. I could tell, from the moment I met you. But back then we didn't know each other well, I couldn't just pry into your life. I still won't. That said, I pushed you, bickered, thinking we could fight out whatever frustrations you were having. Thought I could show you how strong you were. Then I thought, well, punching bags don't fight back."

"So you let me attack you? Even when is wasn't psychical anymore?"

Zoro lifted a shoulder. "It was the only thing I could do that I thought would help."

"And you think I'm strong?" There was a weird hitch in Sanji's voice and he fought the urge to glance over.

"No shit Sanji. And you say _I_ have moss for brains."

The chef let out a very obvious _not_ sniffle but the tan teen could _feel_ the smile when he said, "Thank you, Zoro."

"You're gonna feed me when we get back to the ship. I'd say we're even."

That was the closest he'd ever get to complimenting the bastard's cooking. He was in love, not soft.

Sanji grinned, though he didn't respond.

Zoro was okay with that.

-

The ship was in sight and he felt a rush of homesickness. 

Strange. 

There was no movement, but that was alright, just meant extra peace and--

"GUYS YOU'RE BACK, THANK GODS!!!!! COME QUICK!!!" Usopp screamed, running out of the woods somewhere, a blubbering mess with tears streaming down his face.

"Oi! Calm down. What's going on?" The swordsman demanded, shutting the sniper up.

"Someone," He whispered, fumbling with goggles around his neck. "Someone's on the ship."

The green head relaxed, about to remind the younger that Robin stayed behind to keep watch when Usopp fixed him with a glare that was pure terror.

"It isn't Robin."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the course of this over 20k ZoSan fic, there have hardly been any ZoSan moments
> 
> So I hope I made up for that, just a little.
> 
> It felt sooooo good writing from Zoro's POV, even more-so because all the other times I never really went into his emotions and how he was feeling.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed it! This was the longest chapter I've ever written in a Multi-Chaptered fic


	10. Unmasking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Holy fuck, we're going to die." Usopp whispered, shivering where he stood, arms rubbing up and down one another frantically. "That's it, we're gonna die for real this time. Zoro's flirting and Sanji was just successfully flustered by someone who isn't a woman. They're all signs of the apocalypse. Oh fuck."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pretty short chapter today, but please enjoy!  
> Tbh this is totally a crack chapter at the beginning xD  
> okay, I lied. This whole chapter is pretty much crack. Pay attention though, important stuff are happening!
> 
> Lots of talking. I tried to keep it as concise as possible. Let me know if its too confusing.
> 
> not beta'd

"Robin's in trouble?" Sanji asked at the same time Zoro muttered, "Damn and there goes my date." 

He stared incredulously at the swordsman.

"Your _what?"_

"My date. _You're_ the one who said you'd cook me food shitty cook. And give me sake. Or did you forget, _Sanji-kun_?" Zoro purred, unsheathing Wado, muscles supple as they moved.

 _Honorifics?_ God, he was going to die and it wasn't even going to be the possibly dangerous stranger on their ship that they should totally being focusing on that would kill him.

"T-thats not a date shitty swordsman! I cook for everyone on this crew! Leave it to you to not know how a real date works."

"Then show me." Came the simple response and Sanji gaped, floundering for words like a fish out water.

"Show you what?" He asked, careful to keep his tone neutral. Because there was no way Zoro meant--

"Show me how a real date works ero-cook. That fancy shit is right up your alley ain't it?" The swordsman asked, shooting him a sidelong glance. 

"Y-you're being awfully straight forward." The blonde said, once he'd manage to make his mouth work properly.

"Yeah, well now I know it's not me you don't like, but whatever stupid shit you have in your mind. Which means I have a real chance." The 19 year old bopped him playfully on the forehead with the butt of Wado, before stepping away and giving him an appraising glare that bordered on impatience. "Hurry up and beat those demons in your head swirly brow, so then I can romance the hell out of your prissy ass. Or try to."

"What the hell do you _think_ I've been doing these past few weeks? 'S'not like I wanna deal with them either." Sanji snapped back before pausing, his eyes widening in disbelief.

Holy shit did he just indirectly confess his feelings for Zoro? Did Zoro just _trick_ him into confessing?

And damn that fucker for smiling at him, corner of his eyes creasing and skin gleaming and what group of fucking gods got together to make a man who looked so fucking _appeasing_ with dirt streaks on his face and grass as a shitty replacement for fucking _hair_ and a stupid perfect mouth that said stupid perfect things that made the harsh voices in his head stay silent and damn, damn, damn, damn, _damn_ \--

"Holy fuck, we're going to die." Usopp whispered, shivering where he stood, arms rubbing up and down one another frantically. "That's it, we're gonna die for real this time. Zoro's flirting and Sanji was just successfully flustered by someone who isn't a woman. They're all signs of the apocalypse. Oh _fuck_."

Sanji opened this mouth to respond-- and possibly ask God to smite the swordsman where he stood and curse the loud-mouth sniper into never talking again-- when a cold aura filled with malicious intent made him freeze, instinctively raising a foot off the ground.

He glanced over to Zoro and saw the tan teen in a similar defensive position, grey eyes dark and calculating. 

"So it _is_ you." He heard the green head whisper and turned to face him, eyebrows raised in question.

"You know who's in there?" The blonde asked, tilting his chin towards the ship and Zoro gave him a grim smile in return, expression stormy and contemplative.

"No, but I have a damn good hunch."

"We go in on three?"

"S-sorry but I seem to have come down with a rare case of---"

"Can't go on ship that has a possible murderer disease. We know." Sanji and Zoro chorused, casting each other identical exasperated glances.

"Go climb a fucking tree or something." The swordsman muttered, beginning to approach their vessel at a cautious pace-- apparently deciding that waiting until three was too much of a hassle. "Put those damn goggles to use and be our eyes from above. He tries anything funny, shoot him down."

"It's a guy?" The blonde asked, as Usopp ran off into the undergrowth. The sounds of the ocean were lulling him, a familiar thrum filling his body, as it often did before a battle. 

Zoro spared a glance back, and this time his eyes shone with an emotion akin to amusement. "Something like that." 

_The hell is that supposed to mean?_ He didn't bother to ask, and made his way forward as well, careful to leave enough space between him and the swordsman--who required a certain amount of range to fight effectively.

The ship felt cold with no one on it, devoid of the life and vigor that normally came along with their crew mates. The ocean water was cool, a sparkling blue, and loathe to get his pants wet, he took a running start, before landing lightly on the railing. He dropped down on to the deck lightly, mouth twitching for a cigarette and ease the impulse with the thought of an incoming fight. Sanji felt Zoro land next to him, and was mildly impressed at the stealth of the swordsman. As if being able to read his mind, the tan teen shot him a smirk and he turned away with a light scoff.

Arrogant fucker.

He began looking around, staring off in a random direction and hoped to find the intruder quick, when he heard something whiz through the air- and at the same time, a hand grabbed his collar, yanking him back. He stumbled, regaining his footing and glared back at Zoro, a snarl forming on his lips.

A knife landed on the deck with a solid _thunk._

"What the _hell._ I had it." The blonde said, trying to keep his voice even.

The swordsman had an equally disturbed expression on his face, as if he too were upset with his unnecessary attempts to save the blonde.

"I know." The tan teen growled. "But you--I--" He broke off, making a strangled sound, before taking a deep breath. "I won't let you die."

"Eh? The fuck are you--"

_"I'm not good enough, is that it? I should've let her kill me."_

Sanji's own words came back to him and he grimaced, understanding why the moss-head was so apprehensive. "I'm not going anywhere Marimo." He flicked his cigarette, feeling heat rush to his face and avoided making eye-contact. "I gotta make you dinner remember. But stand in my way like that again and I'll give you something so fucking disgusting, you'll be shitting out bricks for _weeks_."

Looking satisfied, Zoro nodded, not bothering to say anything else, to which Sanji was glad. He didn't think he could handle anymore of the swordsman's worry being directed at him. There was something scarily... _intense_ about it.

The chef had never met anyone who cared like that. In a way that made him feel as though he were being pleasantly pulled apart and evaluated, the seams of his well-sown mask being ripped apart by prying, yet gentle fingers. It was those rare moments, where the blonde truly felt like prey, as if he were a fish being skinned slowly by a skilled hand, filleted and oh so _carefully_ dragged to pieces. 

Only to be put back together again, even better than before.

It was exhilarating.

It was terrifying. 

It was something only _Zoro_ could do to him. 

"And to think the two of you were at each other's throat only 6 hours earlier. Oh, they grow up so fast, don't they?" A deep voice asked and Sanji had barely enough time to think, let alone respond, before a long leg came crashing down--shaking him to the core as it made contact with his own leg. He skid back, gritting his teeth and forced his leg down, shoving it away and knocking the intruder off balance.

"Don't tease them. That isn't nice. You do owe me now though." Another voice said, this one startlingly familiar. 

From behind a mast walked out a another person, their gait cool, oozing contentment. 

"You?" Zoro exclaimed, staring at the newcomer, a young man around their age, with short silver hair and dark violet eyes and smooth fair skin.

" _You!_ " The teen parroted back, doing little finger guns, a smile stretching his features. He seemed completely at ease and the chef was offended on the swordsman's behalf, as if one of the most dangerous people in the world wasn't standing right there.

"You probably shouldn't stare too much." Sanji's opponent stated, ice blue eyes glaring and long black hair wind-swept. "I get jealous when my partners don't pay attention to me."

The blonde jumped black, hopping onto his hands and spinning, begging to rotate his body. As with most fighters, the raven head dodged the first kick, but failed to miss the second one and ended up sprawled on the deck, Sanji's foot at his neck. 

"And you probably shouldn't underestimate your enemies." The chef retorted, wishing for the soothing taste of tobacco.

"Enemies? We never said such a thing." The cocky shit had the audacity to flash a smug smirk. "And that hit was a lucky one."

He felt a vein pop. "The _hell_ did you say?"

"Let it go Sanji. They aren't here to fight, at least not against us. I can tell." Zoro stated, resheathing his katanas, an unspoken _and if they are we can just kill them_ hanging in the air.

After a pause, he stepped back, leaving the guy to stand up on his own.

"Ah Roronoa Zoro, I knew I liked you." The blue eyed teen stated, sitting up and crossing his legs, voice amicable.

The silver-haired boy scoffed, rolling his eyes. "Here you are spewing what are practically love confessions and yet want to talk about jealousy. Of course."

"You love me no matter what I do."

"That does not mean I'll refrain from kicking your ass whenever the temptation strikes."

"If you did, you wouldn't get your beli."

The silver headed teen glowered, the shadows on his face harsh. "With all the bullshit on this island, I wouldn't get my beli anyways."

Sanji was about to interrupt, ask why they were here if it wasn't to fight, when Zoro's voice cut through the tense silence.

"Our archaeologist. Where is she?" 

The blue eyed male gave a friendly grin. "She wouldn't stop struggling so we killed her."

" _WHAT??"_ Sanji squawked, his blood boiling and was ready to pounce on the asshole when he realized the swordsman hadn't moved. Instead, the green head turned to look at him, a smirk playing his weathered lips.

"Relax curlybrow. She's in the library below deck. Likely let these idiots on without a fight. Damn woman, probably wanted to see how we'd manage." 

Sanji told himself that jealousy wasn't a befitting characteristic, that he wouldn't stoop so lo as to be on the same level as the heathens on their ship. And that Zoro was allowed to speak about any woman he chose, even if his voice was uncharacteristically fond. 

The chef then wondered if that was how the swordsman felt whenever he watched the blonde compliment-- _worship--_ women.

Then he wondered about the women who not have wanted his compliments. For the first time, he pondered how it might've felt to them.

_Strange. Creepy. Uncomfortable. Unwelcome._

And then a thought occurred to him. That all this time, he'd been _forcing_ women. Maybe not in the same way as his family, but damn close. 

Fuck.

The raven-head laughed and Sanji glared down at him, angrily thrown out of his mind, which was now swirling with realizations. 

"You catch on fast. I'm impressed. Might even be able to handle me now. You did better than that guy there." The teen pointed over to the bartender from the tavern who gave a wave, then paused, donning a contemplative expression. "Except Luffy. Nobody beats Luffy. And Roronoa. He did well too."

"You know the Captain?" Sanji asked, curiosity piqued. 

The teen only smiled. 

"He's here." Zoro stated suddenly, looking off to the edge of the ship. Sanji followed his gaze, and was hardly surprised when his captain walked through, Nami in tow.

The bartender clapped, gaining everyone's attention. "Well isn't this just lovely. Right on time Nami, I'm impressed you actually managed to get him here."

The red-head shrugged. "I told him to say what you told me. And he got all serious. It wasn't hard at all."

Luffy still hadn't spoken, eyes shadowed beneath black bangs, mouth set in a frown. Despite it all, the blonde swallowed, feeling tense. 

"I suppose we should get started, then, shouldn't we?" The blue-eyed male said, standing up and moving to a rail, before plopping down again, casual movements at odds with the heavy atmosphere. 

"Wait." Sanji said, drawing all the commanding air that he could, stray puzzle pieces that had been floating in the recesses of his mind starting to click. "Who the hell are you? Why are you here? How do you know the Captain? And why are so damn familiar with me. I get Zoro-- he has a bounty, but how me?"

"Blackleg Sanji, your name is quite infamous on the seas, its not rare to know who you are. Though I'm sad to say you seem to have forgotten me." The raven head looked at Zoro, a slow smirk splitting his lips. "Would you like to tell him? Or should I?"

The swordsman shrugged. "It's your secret to tell."

The teen chuckled, before crossing his legs. The sun was finally set and shadows danced around the deck.

"Sanji." And then the boy's voice started to change, becoming lighter, though no less amused. "If I told you I was the woman you knelt before earlier." And with his the figure slimmed, growing curvier, hair changing, becoming shaved on the side, a jet black. The left eye turned green and it gleamed in the darkness. " _Would you believe me?_ "

In front of the chef was a woman. The same woman who had battled Zoro.

His mouth opened, then closed. 

He stared.

The boy-- _girl_ now-- smirked, leaning forward to place a playful bop on Sanji's nose.

"My name is Akira Anniko, Captain of the Shaytan Pirates. Also known as the Demoness of the South Blue." She cocked her head to the side, eyes shining. "And I've come here today, to ask for your help."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh the taste of plot. Coming soon: Scientific shit that makes no sense but its gonna sound good! ^_^
> 
> So, tell me:  
> Sanji's feelings...or rather Sanji admitting his feelings, does it feel like it's too sudden? Does it feel like its going way too fast?  
> I mean, its not like he's all of a sudden without doubts, but all the unhealthy tension between him and Zoro has pretty much disappeared.  
> Thats okay, or should I tone it down??? I want to keep it as "realistic" as possible  
> LMFAO Besides. Akira's is Sanji's worst nightmare.
> 
> Stay tuned!


	11. Getting There

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The smile that Luffy gave them was blinding, even in the dark. "Before I met you guys, Akira was my first real Nakama. When I was a kid, I got stranded on an Island and had to wait for Ace to come get me. I couldn't get back because the raft was destroyed and you know--" The raven head paused, pulling on his cheek in demonstration of his power-- "Aki was the one who helped the whole time I was there. That was one long year."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another short one. Honestly I'm just buying myself time while I finalize the details of the plot xD

Zoro sat, staring quietly, and let the bold announcement sink in.

_"I've come here today, to ask for your help."_

He glanced at Luffy, only mildly surprised to see a smile stretching the rubberman's face impossibly wide. There was another quiet pause, the ship eerily still, before then tension melted as if it were never there. "AKI!!!" The teen screamed, running to embrace the girl. She rocked back on the railing, laughing as the raven head plastered himself all over her body.

After a few moments, she pried him off, pushing the lanky teen back, before clasping their hands. "It's been 10 long years Luf." Akira said, fondness in her tone.

"Yup, and you haven't changed a bit!"

Zoro held in a snort. Leave it to someone like Luffy to completely ignore the fact that girl in front of him had been a boy only moments before. 

Not like it mattered. The only thing was important heart and intention. 

His captain had a knack for finding good people, if the idiot trusted them, the swordsman no real reason not to. 

Besides, he'd already trusted her once, and the bartender was half bad. 

Next to him, Akuma and Nami were sharing a grin that read, " _Look at our idiotic captains."_

They shared a high-five, the action smooth and precise, as if they'd been friends for ages.

"Ready to get your beli back?" The red-head asked, a sinister leer befalling her face. She looked dangerous, bad ass and Zoro shook his head, feeling bad for whatever sorry sap managed to invoke her vengeance.

Money wasn't anything to play around with.

The bartender matched her expression, purple eyes narrowed as he growled, "Honestly? I wanna kill the arrogant bastard. Getting our beli is just a bonus."

"Sorry to interrupt." Robin's voice cut through the commotion, the dark-skinned beauty emerging from the shadows, a smirk on her lips. She looked at Luffy, her gaze unreadable, and then the newcomers, before tilting her head in a tight nod. "I've prepared the downstairs library as per the captain's request. It's ready for us now."

"Thanks Robin!" The raven head exclaimed, bouncing on the balls of his feet with barely contained excitement. "Alright guys. Let's go!"

Nami let out a low whistle. "Good work for once. I forgot you could act like a proper Captain sometimes."

"Aww, don't be like that! I always like a Captain!" 

"Wait, just-- fucking wait." Sanji muttered, and everyone turned to look at the blonde who looked like he was a breath away from a panic attack. " _How_ exactly do you two know each other?"

The smile that Luffy gave them was blinding, even in the dark. "Before I met you guys, Akira was my first real Nakama. When I was a kid, I got stranded on an Island and had to wait for Ace to come get me. I couldn't get back because the raft was destroyed and you know--" The raven head paused, pulling on his cheek in demonstration of his power-- "Aki was the one who helped the whole time I was there. That was one long year."

"A year?!?" They yelled and Zoro just shook his head. Of course his captain couldn't be anything less than extreme. 

"Yup. A year." Luffy quieted, then glanced at Sanji, dark gaze serious. "So trust me okay? And trust Aki. They need our our help now, so we're gonna help."

The tone was final, leaving no room for argument. Everyone stood still on the deck, until a cool breeze flowed over them, bringing with it the scent of salt. 

Nami shivered, bringing her arms over her body and rubbing frantically. "Change of plans. It's cold. Lets call it a night and start this in the morning. How's that sound?"

At everyone's nods, she smiled, before calling it a night, telling Akuma that the guest rooms were below deck. The two followed her, Robin going in not long after and Usopp appearing much later. 

Soon enough, it was only the two of them on deck. Zoro stared at the cook, who sat rocking back and forth as if he were broken. Figures. Someone like Akira was a walking _fuck you_ to Sanji's gender expectation. He wondered how the blonde would cope.

"Come on ero-cook."

"What for? Already trying to bed me Marimo?"

"Idiot. We never put up groceries. Now get up or I'll take my tired ass to bed and leave you here."

The surpise that flickered across Sanji's expression was intoxicating and warmed him from the inside out. He smiled, standing up and walking over to wear the blonde was seating, before putting a hand out. 

"Come on, Sanji."

He never knew how warm the cook's hands were. How nice.

He didn't know if he'd be able to let go. 

But luckily, the chef didn't seem to notice, even when grabbing the discarded bags grew difficult. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed! Short as it was.  
> We get some real info next chapter, I promise!


	12. Learning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "There's a lot of ways this story can be told, but they all start with a man named Mikoto, and a shit ton of counterfeit beli."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LOL  
> Get ready for half-assed science stuff.  
> I tried really freaking hard so I hope you enjoy! <3

Zoro was drunk.

At least, that was the only explanation that Sanji could create to reason why the swordsman was looking at him like _that_. 

Like he was trying to figure something out, but whatever it was, the chef had no clue. 

Sunlight filtered into the kitchen, a pool of light spreading from the circular window of the door unto the floor, something like a golden angel. Outside, he could hear the other crew members running around the Going Merry, wooden planks creaking under the sudden force. Usopp was ranting to Chopper about some new concoction he’d developed while Nami– his beautiful goddess– spoke to Robin– his other beautiful goddess– in low tones, somewhere above them. Their new guests weren't anywhere in sight or earshot, but the chef was certain that they were still there. He wasn't too worried about them concocting some sort of evil plan, Robin most likely had surveillance covered.

It wasn’t long until Luffy’s voice rose above the rest, or rather, his insane stomach, growling loudly and followed my a low groan of hunger. There was a loud whine and then a bang, afterwards all was silent.

The cook scoffed. Of course Luffy was hungry again, like it hadn’t only been an hour since he'd crashed into the kitchen, claiming he was five hours late for his midnight snack. He knew the captain would be invading his sanctuary at some point or another and silently thanked his benevolent queen for buying him some time, the blonde almost certain that she punched the Strawhat’s leader. It wouldn’t be surprising. His idiot captain was too much like a little brother.

He’d need to prepare for Luffy’s inevitable arrival, but there was still the matter of a certain human plant lingering around his kitchen, expression having grown even more odd. A questioning grimace, lips tugged down in a corner, pulling his frown into a deep dip. It was an intense glare, but nothing like the foreplay to their usual fights. It wasn’t the heated leer of anger or competition. It wasn’t sadness or excitement, that much was clear. It was something else but Sanji couldn’t put his damn finger on it.

And that pissed him off more than anything, not being able to understand the swordsman– which didn’t make much sense but he was willing to ignore it.

Zoro was always something of an enigma. 

"Oi, dumbass. You're staring." Sanji griped, not bothering to turn around. "If its sake you want, you know where it is."

When there was no response, he glanced over his shoulder, only to see the swordsman's frown deepen.

"You never give booze away without a fight."

His eyebrow twitched.

Mostly because he knew the teen was right.

"Fine! Don't take the damn sake then. Just stop fucking staring at me like that, you big brainless, idiotic plant moron." Sanji snapped, refraining fro throwing the spoon in his hand.

He needed it to stir the syrup he was making.

Zoro's expression didn't change at the outburst, but he narrowed his eyes, an emotion like defeat flashing through them, before standing up and walking out of the kitchen without another word.

He came back in a few moments later, shooting a challenging glare his way and plopping on the seat, arm crossed and eyes closed. 

Sanji didn't want to think about what it meant but his brain decided to do its own thing and make him wonder about it anyways.

It wasn't like Zoro to get so petulant. 

Like a brat who couldn't get what they wanted at a store.

_Wanted._

The word played in his brain like a broken record.

Was there something the idiotic swordsman wanted? And it wasn't the booze

The hell could _that_ be?

_Whatever._

Sanji didn't have time to waste thinking about something that wasn't even important. 

Breakfast needed to be served. 

He stacked the plates high, filled with pancakes, bacon, waffles, homemade syrup and an assortment of fruits. 

He set everything on the table and smiled at its presentation, certain that their temporary guests would have no complaints. 

Kicking out the door, the chef called out, knowing his voice would ring through the ship.

"NAMI-SWAN~, ROBIN-CHAN~ I'VE PREPARED A DELECTABLE MEAL JUST FOR YOU TWO! I PROMISE IT'LL BE THE BEST THING YOU'VE EVER TASTED! BREAKFAST IS SERVED FOR THE REST OF YOU MORONS. SHOW UP LATE AND I'LL LET LUFFY EAT YOUR SHARE!!"

It was like a storm.

His rubber captain appeared first, having Gomu Gomu no'd his way across the ship and Sanji grabbed his vest collar to keep the raven haired teen from going any further. At least, not before his two goddesses arrived, and with their guests in tow. 

Robin walked in, her dark hair tied in a ponytail and she offered the blonde a sly smile that had him weak in his knees. The silver headed bartender from before-- Akuma was his name, followed after, shooting him an arrogant smirk and a cocky, "'Morning." with a two fingered salute.

Sanji _really_ didn't like the guy.

"Good morning Sanji-kun!" Rang a beautiful voice that he knew well, and could pick out from any crowd. 

"Good morning lovely Nami-Swan!" The blonde replied in earnest, his heart pounding as he watched her glide by him, small waist swaying. She was so mesmerizing. 

"What about me, Sanji- _kun?_ Don't _I_ get a warm welcome?"

He answered without thinking. "Why of _course_ darling--" His voice cut off abruptly as he came in contact with mischievous eyes, and a very real, very _masculine_ face. 

"What's the matter?" Akira asked in a voice that most definitely did _not_ match his appearance and it _did_ things to Sanji's mind that were utterly unacceptable. "Aren't you going to finish giving me that heartfelt declaration? I promise I'll let you down gently."

He felt his face flush, even more so when he heard Zoro snort. "J-just, get in the kitchen."

"Whatever you say." The heterochromic teen muttered, his tone deeper, _proper,_ giving a shrug and brushing past the bonde's shoulder with a mild shove. "Morning Luf! We really gotta catch up at some point. Oh and isn't that the way Ace used to hold you? To keep you from running off somewehere. I remember him doing it a lot when he came to fetch you from my island." Akira rambled on, voice excited, happy, and amused all in one and it was like the tense atmosphere form seconds before just melted. 

"Yeah it is shishishi! You remembered?" Luffy laughed, and Sanji let him go to wreak havoc, deeming enough people in the galley to begin eating. 

Usopp and Chopper crashed through just as their captain reached for their plates. Without a word, Zoro stabbed his fork into the table, trapping the raven head's fingers and nodding when the two youngest members babbled their thanks. 

Sanji walked to his window, taking out a cigarette. He normally didn't indulge in the kitchen unless he was alone, but the crew assured him it was fine. 

And besides, he wanted to watch it all from a distance.

"Course I remembered Luf." The shapeshifter answered calmly as he sat down next to Akuma, not at all phased by the wild processions happening in front of him. "Even if I haven't seen you, we _have_ been friends for ten years."

"Thrw." The teen gasped around a mouthful of food. He swallowed. "True. Do you still have that crush on my brother?"

Sanji didn't think he'd ever seen such a brilliant shade of red eat up skin like that in his entire life. It was undeniably attractive. The blonde gulped, mouth suddenly dry and he looked away, thought not before seeing Zoro, who was watching him intently.

"I told you we'd never talk about that!!!" Akira hissed, shoving a strawberry in his mouth. "You _promised_ me Luffy. God I was so embarrassing."

"Yeah!" The rubberman agreed unabashedly. "You used to run around saying you'd do whatever to be his wife. And that was even before you got your Devil Fruit power!"

"Luffy I will throw you in the ocean." The other male stated coldly.

"Yada." His captain refuted easily, in that way he did. "You need me for this plan you want to carry out." The teen's black eyes glinted in a way that sent chills down Sanji's back. They way it always did when Luffy got serious. "And even if you didn't need me. You need my crew."

The shapeshifter sat back and appraised Luffy in silence, before smiling. "You've grown."

"I'm going to be King of the Pirates. Of course I have."

The two stared at one another, before clasping hands.

"You better do it crybaby. Get to the top. Or I'll be forced to do it for you."

Luffy laughed. "Nah, you won't have to."

"Well, now that introductions are over. Care to explain what the hell is going in here on this island?" Nami asked, her brown gaze dark and serious.

Akuma, pondered, before shrugging. 

"There's a lot of ways this story can be told, but they all start with a man named Mikoto, and a shit ton of counterfeit beli."

Robin narrowed her eyes but didn't speak.

Sanji stubbed out his smokes, leaving the unlit stick in his mouth before walking silently to the table, clearing the dishes and piling them into the sink, one after the other. He was pleased to note that both guests had cleaned their plates of food. It made him smile.

The blonde watched from his peripheral as Akuma leaned forward, elbows resting on the wood. 

"Ryunosuke Hachiro is one of three major leaders in this region. Compared to other powers in the world, he's small fry but not someone to be underestimated."

"The Triumvirate." Their archaeologist murmured, her blue eyes cold and pondering. 

The bar tender nodded in affirmation. "That's their other name. Together Mikoto Mikado, Saburo Daisuke, and Ryunosuke Hachiro make up the South Blue Triumvirate. All three of them Devil Fruit users, Mikoto the strongest of them all. Luckily, he's not our target, and we're far off his radar."

"You know about them?" Nami asked, facing the dark haired woman. Robin pursed her lips, a rare sign of distaste flitting across her features.

"Only a bit, Crocodile had me do research on them a while back. They were very elusive, I couldn't find much of anything." The archaeologist stated, folding her hands neatly, and gave a small grin, her eyes flashing in interest. "However, that man, Ryunosuke you said his name was? I learned that he possessed the Mira-Mira no Mi." She paused, seeming to enjoy the table's ratcheting discomfort. "And apparently, once used on you, there is no way to escape it. Not unless the user willingly deactivates its affects."  
  
"Exactly!" Akira replied merrily, popping one last strawberry in his mouth. Sanji tried not to watch the way his lips moved. Nor the way he shot the blonde a knowing glance. "Except there happens to be a cure after all."

"The hell does it do to begin with?" Zoro growled, a scowl darkening his expression. "Mira-Mira no Mi? What, does it make you see shit or something?"

"Mh." The heterochromic teen hummed, tilting back precarious in his chair. Sanji wondered how someone like that could be a captain. He stole a glance over to Luffy, who was picking his nose and discarded the thought. "Something like that. His body can transform into a mist that acts as an inhalant and hallucinogen to anyone who breathes it in. The victims see a picture perfect scene. There are no seams, their reality simply becomes something different. Quite interesting. And yet, that's not even the most dangerous part."

"N-no? I-it isn't?" Usopp squeaked, already shaking his boots. 

Akira, grinned, his teen growing sharper, until they represented a predators. "The worse part, is that it isn't something random. It fits within the direct aspects of the day and moment of whoever its being used on."

Sanji watched as Chopper looked around the table of grim faces, confusion etched into his tiny body. "I don't understand, what makes that so dangerous?"

"Its hard to track." Zoro answered, his face having gotten even scarier within the passing moments. "The mist makes everything feel normal and realistic, meaning that no one is going to know that something's wrong. In a situation like this, instinct and intuition won't work because it doesn't realize that its in an unusual predicament." The swordsman paused, letting out an audible growl. "Which means that anyone with a strong desire is most at risk. And that if they get sucked into that mentality, they'll never come back, even if the Devil Fruit is deactivated. The brain won't accept anything more than whatever perfect world the mist created."

"Dingdingding we have a winner!" Akuma exclaimed with a wry smirk, purple gaze dark beneath silver bangs. "Nice to know you're actually as sharp as your swords." 

"A power like that...its unreal. To have the potential to completely scramble a person's brain." Nami breathed, eyes wide.

"It's not so bad, not really. They're still completely functional. They can talk, walk, breath, and eat like everyone else. But they'll remember things differently. Their reality will have been completely altered. Its not so bad." Akira repeated softly. "After all, most people don't want to leave that perfect place."

They trailed off into silence, the atmosphere heavy.

Then Akuma laughed, breaking the tension. "Why so glum? We said there was a cure didn't we?" He scoffed. "Though it isn't a cure so much as a natural immunization. Which you all happen to have in spades. Tell me," The bartender gave a wicked leer. "Have you ever of the phrase, "fight fire with fire?"

"No but it sounds cool!" Luffy exclaimed, smiling like an idiot. "Fire is _always_ awesome when its used right."

"Hell yeah it is." Akuma nodded emphatically, then turned to everyone else. "Devil Fruit Users." He stated simply. "It doesn't work on them. Nor on anyone who's spent a significant amount of time around one."

"That doesn't mean it _can't_ work. Just that it _won't,_ not unless you let it." The shapeshifter interjected, a warning in his tone. "You can't let your guard down, because then it'll be impossible to bring it back up. Unless, of course, you're dropping it on purpose. Still, I don't recommend it."

"How come it won't affect us?" Robin questioned, gaze hungry and Sanji was reminded of her love for history.

Akira shrugged loosely. "Something to do with the brain and DNA. Devil Fruit users alter their DNA the moment that first bite is taken. They become something that isn't entirely human. It changes, to an extent, the way they act, think, and feel. It makes sense no, that at some point, it'd begin to alter those around them as well? After all, sane men don't exist where a devil fruit user is concerned."

The blonde thought it made sense.

It was hard to be human when surrounded by monsters, and each user was a beast in their own right. To keep up, the body had to adapt, and the brain had to expand, change. Redefine the meaning of impossible and shed away a layer or two of that overrated thing called sanity. For anyone who knew a Devil Fruit user, reality was already warped. 

It hit him then and he gasped. " _FUCKING INTUITION!_ " He shouted, then fidgeted slightly when they looked at him in surprise. "Marimo, what he was saying about people being unable to identify an issue with the mist because their instinct couldn't sense the abnormality," Sanji started, growing animated with each word. "It won't affect us. Because we've seen the impossible and know the true limits of this world. Or at least have a damn good idea. One thing for certain, is we know that shit isn't always perfect, no matter how much it may seem that way. We won't be fooled."

The two guests nodded, looking satisfied. 

"Great! Nice to know we won't become mind-controlled dummies." Nami deadpanned, lips stretched into a rigid line. 

"Not unless you want to!" Akuma added.

"Not unless we want to." The red head amended, rolling her eyes.

"And I know I run the risk of sounding repetitive, but it's imperative that you understand _exactly_ what you're dealing with." Akira stated, his voice darker than the joking tone they'd all grown used to. "This isn't mind-control. He can't coerce you into doing anything you don't want. You have complete and total free will. You'll still wake up in the morning and and do your daily workout. You'll still hate the same people and love the others. This isn't some alter ego, or advanced puppetry. Its just you, and your perfect world." Akira held his blue and green eyes downwards, shame filling his gaze. "And who needs free will in a perfect world, when its everything you've ever wanted?"

"You've experienced it, haven't you?" Zoro asked, his voice and expression unreadable.

"We both have." Akuma snapped, his purple eyes flashing with warning. 

"I was addicted once. I still itch for it." 

Sanji watched as Akira looked at Zoro, a rueful grin on his face.

"But you're stronger than me. I don't think you'll succumb." The raven head paused, tilting his head. "You want to though, don't you Roronoa? You want to give in to your desires, and see that happy ending that's so close but oh so far away."

Sanji felt his throat dry as the shapeshifter landed those blue and green eyes on him. 

There were only a span of a few seconds, before Zoro's katana's were drawn, and he lunged across the table in anger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FUCK NO I POSTED IT TOO EARLY BY ACCIDENT  
> Okie, im just gonna leave it. Fuccck. Im sorry. 
> 
> Soooo~ What'd you think?


	13. A broken Faucet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Emotional Zoro here  
> It was weird to write. I tried to keep it IC, afterall its not like we haven't seen him cry before.

Zoro didn’t know why he was so angry.

He thought it might be the smug way that Akira looked at him. 

As if he sensed the worry and unease that’d been eating at the swordsman from the night before. 

And the burning _want_. 

He leaped across the table, Yubashiri and and Kitetsu lll drawn, He felt his foot land on sturdy wood, before springing off, barreling into the pale teen and stabbing his blades on either side of the shapeshifter’s head. Kitetsu hissed as it missed its target, still singing impatiently to taste the blood it sensed was near and for once Zoro was tempted to indulge his problem child of a cursed blade.

Distantly, he heard Nami scream and Sanji move towards them, followed closely by the bartender who radiated anger, before being commanded by Luffy to _stand down and let them figure this out by themselves._

Good.

It meant there’d be no collateral damage.

“Struck a nerve there, did I?” Akira smirked, gazing up at the swords in blatant appreciation, completely unconcerned for his safety. “Truth hurts.”

“Don’t pretend you know me.” Zoro hissed, words almost lost in the threatening rumble of his throat. “You don’t know _anything_ about me.”

Hands fisted his shirt, dragging the swordsman down until the two were nose to nose, close enough to share a breath, even a kiss if they so wished. 

“ _That’s the thing_ , dumbass.” The shapeshifter snapped, blue and green gaze piercing him with unfettered understanding that shook the swordsman to his core. “I don’t _have_ to know you to know what a love-struck pining _idiot_ you are.”

The words were accompanied by a harsh shake and Zoro let his body be dragged, too out of it to respond.

He knew the crew were aware of his feelings, having spoken to each of them about it at least once.

Robin had been the first to know, his first for a lot of things. She was his first infatuation and first heartbreak. His first love, but his second loss. She was the first to hold his hand and not insult him when he asked how to find a book in the library because the building kept moving around. She was the first to laugh at his tense jokes and know what he was thinking to the point that it was uncomfortable.

But Sanji was the first person that Zoro thought he’d want to spend the rest of his life with. 

And the fact that someone knew that. Someone who was a stranger. Someone who'd he'd contemplated fighting on two occasions. The fact that someone could tell how he felt with seemingly a _glanc_ e--

It was terrifying.

_Shit._

It was really fucking scary.

Training shirtless on winter islands couldn't compete with just how _cold_ he was.

“Leave.” Luffy ordered and knowing the words weren't directed at him, the swordsman kept his gaze low, letting the shame rise and wash over him, melting the ice that froze his bones and locked him in place.

He was better than this. So much fucking better. 

To let such... _trivial_ sentiments get in the way. Even if they weren't trivial. Not at all. 

“Fine.” Zoro sneered at Akira after the crew had dispersed, feeling the tight hold on his emotions beginning to slip with a vehemence, passion and insecurities pouring out of him, equivalent to only two other times. Two miserable days. “Fucking _fine._ You got me. I want it. I want it bad. Bad enough that I’d kill for it. Is _that_ what you wanted to hear?”

He expected a smug smile or snarky response but was surprised to see the worry, fear and anger in Akira’s expression.

“Listen to me.” The devil fruit user said, tone dark. “You can’t, no matter what. You said it yourself, once you’re in there, there’s no coming back.”

“Yeah, but it's different for people like us, isn’t it? We can come back ourselves. I’m strong, I can handle it.” His voice was bordering on desperate and it sickened him how much he wanted it, How much he was craving that bright smile and long legs and civil conversations without bite to them.

He’d stared at the chef all morning, noticing the dark bags under those cerulean eyes and deft, but slow movements. He wanted to ask, “are you okay?” “what’s wrong?” but didn’t know how. Not in a way that wouldn’t make it sound like he was making a taunt.

So he’d stared and and watched and got kicked out of the kitchen for his efforts, feeling even worse than before.

He was an idiot for thinking he had a chance.

Sanji was only receptive because it was a weird day, and it took an emotional toll on them most. It made Zoro’s tongue loose and let him say the things he normally kept inside. He even used the witch as inspiration and tried that half-assed shit called flirting. And it seemed like it worked. It seemed like it meant something.

The cook even promised him a meal. 

But that’s what Sanji _did_. He made food for everyone, he made people happy and overworked his skinny ass to the brink. Feeding the swordsman was a part of that.

Just business. 

Zoro was just something for Sanji to pass the time until their next port. The shitty cook probably thought Zoro was joking or pulling elaborate prank and going with it. 

But if that was the case then why did the blonde always look so _sad?_

The shapeshifter spoke, dragging him out of his thoughts.

“Just because we can come back, doesn’t mean we should go _in_. Trust me, once you go, you won’t _want_ to return.” Akira whispered, looking into him with deep eyes that felt like they were gouging out his soul. “If you go. You’ll die. And your nakama need you here.”

“But--” _death was worth it. Throwing it all away was fine._ Was it really? Was it worth giving up his dreams for? Losing his nakama forever? Was it worth losing his sense of self?

 _Yes._ His mind whispered traitorously, seductively, in a voice that sounded too much like the shitty cook’s, tone one the blonde would never use with him.

He shook, hands sliding off the hilt of his katana to rest uselessly by his sides, wood rough beneath it.

Zoro felt his head being pulled down and made a noise of surprise when he found his nose shoved in bundled fabric, long black hair stroking his face.

“I don’t know you.” The captain said. “So you can cry if you want. It's not like anyone would believe it if I told them.”

It was like a damn burst and his body wracked with a choked sob. The tears came, hot, heavy, an unhinged faucet and it refused to stop. Low noises fell from his mouth and it took a moment for the brain to connect the shattered sounds. When he realized what he was saying, it only made him cry more.

_Sanji._

_Sanji._

_Sanji._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> short chapter today!  
> more plot stuff next chapter, but i felt that we hadnt really seen JUST how hard this was all hitting Zoro, you know?  
> I apologize if you feel like this is starting to drag  
> Please give your thoughts. Thanks for reading :)


	14. Remembrance is Filled With Blood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "This hat. It's seen a lot of tears. From the man who passed it down. From me." Luffy laughed. "A lot from me. From Nami, and now you too. So don't worry okay? It won't judge you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Im so sorry!!! School is kicking my ass right now.

Roronoa Zoro was an anomaly. 

Akira didn't know what to make of it. 

The fact that The Demon of the Easy Blue was currently curled in his arms, crying because he-- quite literally-- couldn't pursue his dream.

It felt surreal, and the only emotion he could muster was sympathy for the teen. He was only a few years older than the swordsman but anyone could tell that this was an unfamiliar set of sensations for the stoic man, who was used to making quick and efficient decisions.

 _Its not like me to get worked up over something so simple._ Was probably what the kid was thinking. 

Akira knew the feeling. 

It wasn't pleasant. 

Luffy walked forward, apparently done with silently observing and he shot the seventeen year old a warning glance, which Luffy promptly ignored. The lanky teen crouched down, glaring holes into his swordsman and Akira felt his arms instinctively tighten.

He didn't know why or when he'd grown so protective of the tan teen, but it happened and if he could prevent more hurt from occurring then he would. The blonde too. Despite those questionable morals, the chef was a remarkable and kind man, hindered only by his own mind. 

It was a shame to see such strong, compatible people be so torn apart. 

Though Akira had come to them for help-- which was severely needed-- at some point in the past few days he'd made up his mind to assist these two in whatever way he could. Especially the blonde. 

"Oi, Zoro." Luffy stated and the green-head stiffened, turning almost robotically towards the voice of his captain. The shapeshifter relinquished his grip, letting the other sit up. He watched Roronoa open his mouth-- likely to apologize-- but smiled when the raven head placed that notorious straw hat on his friend's head.

"This hat. It's seen a lot of tears. From the man who passed it down. From me." Luffy laughed. "A lot from me. From Nami, and now you too. So don't worry okay? It won't judge you."

"Me too." Akira said, lazily raising a hand. "Remember that one time? It was after Ace rejected me for like the third time in a row."

Luffy grinned, the stupidly wide one that should be fucking _illegal._

"Shihihihihi~ yeah, I remember! He used me to slingshot you halfway across the island." The shapeshifter snorted as his friend continued. "That had been really mean! But you would like Ace now! He got SUUUPPPPER nice! I'm sure if you confessed again he'd reject you a lot better." 

"Lovely." Akira muttered. "Either way I'll get rejected. Well whatever. I'd hate to be flung _anywhere_ now that you're bigger."

"It worse than you could imagine." Zoro grunted, standing up and resheathing his blades, before holding a hand out. 

He took it gratefully and smirked. "You saying you experienced it first hand?"

The swordsman scoffed, eyes still a bit red, but he gave a small grin. "Nothing like hearing Gomu Gomu no and then suddenly being airborne."

Akira couldn't help it, he laughed. The mental visage of such a capable man being thrown through the sky like canon fodder was just too amusing. 

"You're about as bad as the bartender." The green head growled, though the words had no real bite. "Getting off on my misery seems to be a reoccurring theme here."

The silence that followed was tense and it made his skin prickle uncomfortably, until Luffy laughed, slapping Zoro on the back.

"Silly Zoro, we're only laughing because you're an idiot! Shihihihi." 

And just like that that, the tension was broken. The swordsman surged forward, trying and failing to grab his rubber captain, scowl making way for a small smirk.

Akira was twenty two, not old by many stretch of the word, but watching the teens run around in circles like a bunch of fools lightened the burdened he'd been feeling for a while now.

It was pleasing to seeing a younger generation so bright, strong, and determined. So capable.

So much more potential than him.

"The _both_ of you are idiots. Now lets go, your friends are waiting for us and I'd let to clear the air about a few things." Akira said, smoothing his clothes down, though it wasn't really needed. 

Akuma always said that he was a neat freak. The thought made him smile.

Glancing at his palms, his breath stuttered, eyes going wide.

The grin that settled on his lips shriveled until he we wore an expression akin to horror.

His hands.

They were covered in _blood._

Soaked, doused, utterly _drenched_ in the sticky, metallic _substance._

_Not again._ Not again.

He saw the body. Felt the heat in it fade into a freezing cold.

All over again he watched the light in those hazel eyes disappear.

He could _hear_ those last words being spoken.

_"Its...not your fault."_

He blinked. 

The glaring, mean, _bright_ red disappeared. 

_Fuck._

Akira studied Luffy and Zoro with growing concern. He hadn't wanted to bring up the past, bring up _those_ memories, but there wasn't much else of an option.

If he didn't tell them it'd end up worse.

If he didn't tell them, it could be Zoro who was affected next. 

"Alright you two, let's go." The raven head said, forcing a bright tone. He turned and started towards the door, images of the boy he'd let die flash behind his eyes. 

"It's story time."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not one my best chapters. I'm sorry, I just didn't want to leave you guys waiting too long.
> 
> Please let me know your thoughts :)


	15. A Trip Down Memory Lane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Before she could ask what he meant, the world went black, the last thing she saw was Akuma's purple eyes shining with resignation and guilt.
> 
> Damn. Did they betray us?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of explanation this chapter. Feel free to ask questions if you desire clarification.
> 
> Warning for: Bullshit Science, Traumatic Events, and More Bullshit Science
> 
> Okay seriously, it gets dark. Graphic Violence
> 
> Please enjoy! :)
> 
>   
> not beta'd  
> not beta'd

She didn't really know what she was waiting for.

Maybe a loud crash, or even louder yelling.

Maybe the sound of blood as it hit the wooden floors, or tell tale sign of swords being unsheathed.

Maybe a flurry of curses, or murmured reassurance. 

She didn't know honestly. 

But it most certainly wasn't this prolonged... _silence._

The library was dark, the flickering of candles casting long shadows over everyone's face. The small room was filled to the brim with books of all kinds, set in a circular formation, an oval table seated in the middle. She was sitting next to their archaeologist, legs crossed, and back straight against the wooden chair. Usopp sat across from her, nervously twiddling his fingers and sparing short, distressed glances at the chef. Akuma was positioned on her right, standing with arms crossed as he leaned on the chair in from of him, nervously drumming on the wooden surface. Chopper was seated on Robin's lap, gazing around the area with big, watery eyes.

The room was silent, aside from the rhythmic _tap, tap, tap,_ of Sanji's shoes as he walked around the space available, long legs seemingly eating the little distance that was there. 

When the door to the library creaked opened, she tensed, worry washing over her in a tumultuous wave. it was ridiculous, she _knew_ the strength both her captain and their swordsman possessed. She'd seen it firsthand so there was no need for the insufferable concern that threatened to drown her. 

She supposed she was thankful to not be a Devil Fruit user.

A soft hand landed on her shoulder, warm, comforting and Nami glanced over, seeing Robin offer her a rare smile. She smiled back, aware of how strained she must look, unused to seeing Zoro so unrestrained, and not in a good way. She should've _known,_ should've _saw_ just how unhinged and emotionally unstable the swordsman was getting, placing it all behind a carefully crafted mask.

"So _what_ if I hurt him? _What about me, huh? What about the pain_ I'm _feeling?_ "

The words came back to her, loud, _harsh_ and echoing and the navigator turned, staring at the blonde cook as he paced around in a small circle, unlit cigarette dangling precariously as he glared holes into the wooden door that was still opening.

_Sanji._

She never realized how much he was hurting. Never even contemplated it, considering how much of an open book the chef always was. The red-head bit her lip in shame, sadness welling inside as she observed Usopp place a tentative pat on Sanji's back, rubbing in small quick circles, as if he were scared. 

She'd taken him for granted.

Assumed his bright smile, fawning, and apparent happiness was just who he was.

Was just _Sanji._

But she was wrong. So, so wrong. And she'd come to rest on his welcome, open emotional stability without ever offering any back. She took and took and stole like sher namesake, but never offered anything in payment.

And the realization was like a harsh slap across the face. 

"Well that was eventful." Akira's voice sounded, coming out in a bored drawl. "But your swordsman and I are on the same page now, so its alright." He walked in, green and blue gaze filled with mirth, but something felt off to Nami. The air was heavy with anticipation, trepidation, and something else she couldn't quite put her finger on, but felt ominous all the same.

It felt like a storm.

As if confirming her concern, Luffy bounded in, all reckless energy and large smiles. He made a beeline for Sanji and the red-head jumped, thinking of a few days ago, of that ruthless _punch,_ and those dark eyes that offered not even a bit of mercy. 

She could tell the chef was thinking the same thing, leg fidgeting as if fighting for control, stuck between taking whatever was going to happen or trying to block. Too late, Luffy breached the space and practically _pounced_ on the unsuspecting blonde, tackling him to the ground and laughing as they landed in a pile of limbs. 

"Shihihihi, don't worry Sanji! Zoro's okay now. You're gonna be okay too." And with the loud announcement laughed again, before placing a big, sloppy kiss on the chef's cheek. The raven head sat up, cocking his head to the side, seemingly oblivious to Sanji's red face and bewildered expression. Nami didn't blame him, she too, was fucking confused about the sudden turn of events. 

"Hmmm." Luffy hummed, deep in thought. "That was weird. Makino always did it after I got hurt and it made me feel better, so I thought it'd be good to make _you_ feel better but honestly I didn't like doing that. Kissing feels weird. I don't get how people do it. What's the point of putting meat on your mouth if you can't eat it?"

Akira snorted, eyes bugging out his head from contained chuckles.

Akuma didn't bother holding back and had tears running. 

Nami just shook her head. Luffy was stupid, not naive. He knew _exactly_ what sex was, let alone something as trivial as kissing. It was something he didn't care for, was all.

She thought of Arlong Park, and the way the fishmen would stare at her exposed skin. She shivered. 

Honestly, the red-head understood where her captain was coming from.

"SHittY rubberman! I'll throw you in the ocean!!" Sanji screamed, voice tight with embarrassment and she spared a glance at them before looking at Zoro, who'd entered the room silently and sat without a word. His eyes were tinged red, and mouth was curved in a slight frown, but other than that he seemed alright. He noticed her staring and offered a minuscule nod, lifting an imaginary drink as though asking for a refill.

She smiled, feeling somewhat relieved. The small motion meant that he was feeling alright, for now at least. It was a code of sorts that they'd come up with on a whim, when she'd caught him curled up in a ball from a nightmare, and he found her in a similar position on a later night. 

"Shihihihi, you won't throw me! You love me!" Luffy chirped, jumping up and putting out a hand for the blonde to grab. "And I love you! You're Nakama!"

"I know, I know." Sanji muttered, dusting himself off, looking bashful. The sight made Nami grin. It was nice to see her family look happy, even if only a little. It felt like a long time since they'd really been on ship without the overlying tension.

And of course, nothing good was ever allowed to last. 

"Sorry to cut the joyous moment short, really I am." Akira smirked, the mirth not reaching his eyes. "But there's something I wanted to say. More like, a story I wanted to tell." His expression darkened, at odds with the growing smile. "Just a little something to... _break the ice_ before we get down to the nitty gritty."

He sat across from Akuma, giving the man a close-lipped grin. "Relax, my dear, worrisome boyfriend. I know what I'm doing."

The were a choked sound, followed by Sanji's mortified expression. The shapeshifter just shrugged, waving a hand in the blonde's general direction as if to say, " _See. Exactly my point."_

"Alright!" He stated, clasping his hands together. "Let's get started. This won't hurt a bit, I _promise~"_

Before she could ask what he meant, the world went black, the last thing she saw was Akuma's purple eyes shining with resignation and guilt.

 _Damn. Did they betray_ _us?_

* * *

_-+-_

* * *

_She wasn't on the Going Merry anymore._

_She..didn't know_ where _she was._

_It was an island of some sort, familiar, but not. She felt she should know why she was here, and why the rest of her crew wasn't._

_Her crew, where were they?_

_Where was anyone?_

_And that's when Nami noticed._

_The island was dead silent and not even the animals stirred._

_She was also standing in the middle of a forest, wearing a dark leotard that she most definitely_ didn't _own but wouldn't mind keeping, and green combat boots that blended into the scenery._

_The air was warm, welcoming and it tanned her pale skin, wind blowing black hair in her face and--_

_Black hair?_

_Nami froze, reaching a tentative hand-- fair skinned, but much lighter than normal--up to her head, blanching when she realized that the silky strands were indeed a deep obsidian._

_She let the hair fall, shaking slightly as she touched her face, gasping audibly at the features that were now hers....except they weren't._

_"Hey!" A cheerful voice sounded, and she whirred around, hand instinctively reach for her climatact, but instead landing on a heavy duty knife. A boy around her age walked out into the clearing, dirt covering his face and bags under his eyes that did nothing to dull to bright smile he wore. "I caught us some fresh rabbit! Now we won't have to worry about bothering the villagers!"_

_"She didn't respond, still trying to comprehend the situation. Clearly the kid knew her, or_ thought _he knew her. And apparently they were good friends if he could dangle a dead animal in her face with an expectant grin._

"Congratulate him. He's waiting for your praise." _A voice whispered in her ear, breathy and fleeting._

_"Uh, good job?" The navigator offered weakly, praying that she sounded more steady than she felt._

_She felt like the world as she knew it was being turned upside-down. Memories were being shoved into her head, one after another, piling until they were dangerously stacked. They mingled with her own, striking her heart with several sensations in a way that was nearly overwhelming._

_In a flash, the teen's name came to her, accompanied by a bittersweet pang._

Yuki.

_"What're you doing way out here, huh Akira?"_

Akira?

_And then Nami was drowning, and unable to tell which direction was up._

* * *

-+-

* * *

She bolted upright, breath heavy, and gaze wild. All around, the rest of her crew mates were having the same reactions, the only calm one being Robin, aside from their two guests.

"Welcome back." The shapeshifter said, grinning pleasantly, as if he hadn't done something completely _violating._

"What the _fuck_ was that?" Sanji and Nami yelled at the same time Luffy exclaimed, "SUGOI!!"

"That." Akira began, once the room had quieted. "Was another asset to my Devil Fruit, Hito-Hito no Mi, or more commonly known as, The Person-Person fruit. It's not far off from the fruit your fabulous doctor over there consumed."

"Flattery won't get you anywhere with me jackass." Chopper said, wriggling in satisfaction.

The man just smiled.

"My powers grant me the ability to turn into anyone, any person. I can steal their features, their voice, their walk, their very mannerisms. Its all mine for the taking. And I can create my own as well. Mannerisms and appearances I mean." The raven head explained, everyone watching with avid interest, even Luffy, who normally had a worse attention span than a child. "I am everyone, and I am no one. Though everyone is someone, so in the end I suppose I'm just me."

"Everyone..and no one? Everyone...is _someone? Me..or you?"_ The 17 year old murmured, rubbing his chin.

"And what does that mean, exactly?" Robin asked, ignoring their captain who had begun rocking back and forth in contemplation.

"It means that I am connected to every human being, at least in theory, and therefore have the ability to... _share_ experiences. I can't take them though, nor can I manipulate them to my will. Think of it as a" He paused, waving his hand around. "a lower class version of the Mira-Mira no Mi, or a more advanced version of the Mane-Mane no Mi.. I can make you see things, but they're _my_ memories and completely true events. Not only that though. _You're_ completely aware of who you are and the fact that the "world" you were in wasn't reality as you know it."

Chopper's eyes were wide in amazement. "So what you're saying," the boy started excitedly, "Is that the Fruit altered your DNA, making it ever-changing and malleable, since you can and _are_ whoever you want to be, right? In technicality and theory then, you're essentially everyone's brother or sister! Even more than that, you _are_ everyone, which is why you can share your memories with no problem, except they aren't _you,_ so you can't steal or mess up anything in their mind! Did I get it right?"

"Absolutely, along with the small tidbit that while you're of free mind, you'll still feel compelled to say respond a certain way. That is irreversible, after all, these are my _memories._ And the events that transpired cannot be changed. Other than that, all other facts were nailed right on the head. You're a very smart young man, did you know _that?"_

"Oi, let's use use words we can _all_ understand." Zoro growled, while the reindeer squirmed happily. 

"Heh, as if moss like you would be able to understand anything that gets said." Sanji sneered, looking mildly panicked. 

The swordsman just raised a patronizing brow, not rising to the bait. "You really want to fight right now curly?" He scoffed, fingers twitching on the butt of his katana. "From what I can tell, there's a shit ton of bad guys we'll be able to have a go at later, so keep your panties on."

"Sure you don't want him to just take it off instead?" Akuma purred, giving a Cheshire grin as Zoro looked away, dim lighting still managing to catch the bits of red hungrily chasing caramel skin.

"Tch, whatever. Just get on with it." He mumbled, not so subtly changing the subject. Nami would've laughed, and nudged his shoulder playfully, but something was nagging her, a thought she couldn't get rid of.

"What's the point of this? Why are you showing your memories?" The red-head asked, fixing the man with a pointed glare, surprised to see remorse fill his gaze.

"Ah, simply because I can't bring myself to _tell_ you. A selfish motive, I admit." He replied quietly. "I suffer from the trauma, you see, and try not to think about it if and when it can be avoided. The perks of my Hito-Hito no Mi, is that I can transport you into those memories, without having to relive them myself. And because you retain control of your own conscious, the after effects won't be as strong or long lasting."

The care and thoughtfulness behind the response gave her pause. 

"What happened that was so bad you can't bear to see it?"

She didn't get an answer.

"WAIT! I GET IT NOW!" Luffy screamed, slamming his hands on the table. "So send us back in. Akira's scared to see it right? Then don't. Don't hurt yourself anymore, okay? Send us back so my crew can get it too. The reason you want to show us, is because of Zoro and Sanji right?"

The shapeshifter inclined his head, shaking slightly. "You know, you're scarily intuitive."

"Shihihi, sure, whatever that means. But you're power isn't important right now. So come on! Come on!" The raven slapped his hands on the table again, giving an excited laugh before stopping suddenly, aura growing intense. "I want to know my nakama's enemies. I want to be able to help."

One by one, everyone around the table nodded and Nami couldn't help but give a thin smile. She was proud of her family. "Let's do it."

Akira didn't respond right away, but his eyes shone with gratitude. "Very well."

This time, she welcomed her fading vision, and allowed herself to drown in the coming darkness.

* * *

-+-

* * *

_"Hey! Didn't you hear me? You sure have been spacing out a lot lately." The kid-- Yuki-- said, a mischievous grin on his face. "Is something weighing on my Captain's mind?"_

_"I'm just thinking." She responded, giving in to the urge to ruffle the short brown locks._

_The teen laughed, pushing her hand away affectionately. "Don't hurt yourself, now."_

"Kick him." _The voice demanded and after a brief moment of hesitation she thrust a leg out, watching as Yuki flew several meters._

_"I win." Nami chirped, then blinked, surprised by her own words._

_Clearly the teen wasn't, if the exasperated eye roll was anything to go by. "Yeah, yeah. Whatever you say. Come on, lets go back to ship, not like this rabbit is gonna skin itself."_

"Ask about the village." 

_Okay, so the voice thing just wasn't going to go away._

_"Yuki!" She called, beginning to make her way out of the forest, feet following an instinctive path. "What's going on with the village, heard anything new? What going on with trade? Any luck snaring an ally?"_

Trade?

 _Yuki shook his head, lips curling into a scowl. "No one. Not even one person. None of the other islands are willing to trade with us. And I can't blame them. It's all counterfeit. Every last beri. And money we_ do _find that's clean isn't nearly enough to pay for the things they need." The brunette fixed her with a fierce glare. "We can't keep lying to the village Aki. If we don't tell them soon, there won't be anything we can do to help my people. There's only so many documents I can forge."_

_She sighed. "You know we can't. This is bigger than Barci. We tell the towns people whats happening and what will they be able to do aside from panic?" Her voice came out strained, resigned, as if it were an age old argument._

_"Whatever you say captain." Yuki replied, and the pang of sorrow that struck her was strong._

_-_

_"Oi! I'm back you sons of bitches. Welcome your captain, why dontcha." She spoke with a baritone timbre now, taller and stockier as well, having changed into the male form as she walked towards a secluded part of the island, the brunette by her side. "The pretty village boy caught some food while you idiots jerked yourselves off to the innocent maidens of Barci. What do we say?"_

_"Thank you!" Her crew chorused, smiles all around, despite the rather harsh insults._

_"Sorry to break it to ya Cap'n, but Malachi here got cum all over those pretty white bed sheets of yers. At least it'll blend in!" A large man guffawed, wrapping his arms around a smaller, crew mate, who's face heated in mortification._

_She rolled her eyes. "Har fucking har. Some pirate crew we make."_

_"You say that, but you haven't even seen the crazy shit we managed to loot from a nearby ship. Real fancy looking too."_

_She took the fresh meat from Yuki's hands, passing it to chef, who gave a nod and a smile. "You get caught?"_

_"Course not!" They yelled back at varying levels of indigence and Nami raised her hands in a placating manner._

_"Not to imply that you would, but I was just making sure." She grinned. "The hell are you lazy fucks waiting for? Show me what you managed to snag."_

_Everyone cheered, digging into pockets and rushing around their ship, a fresh coat of protected oils covering the hull and sides._

_It was beri._

_A lot of beri._

_More than any sane person would carry on a ship at once, let alone out in the open where it was easy to snatch and grab. She reached down, picking up a wad of cash, ruffling it slightly._

_"Oi, Yuki, give me a beri. The bill, not a coin."_

_The brunette reached in his pocket and handed over the slightly crumpled piece of paper without a word._

_Nami took it, expert eyes scanning the two with scary diligence. She put down the first wad, then reach for another, and another, until all the money was gone, separated into two distinct piles._

_She took a step back and surveyed her work, before letting out a quiet sigh, aware of the questioning looks of her crew mates._

_"The ones on the left." The navigator pointed towards the larger pile, giving it a disgusted glare. "Its fake." She waited for the enraged murmurings to quiet down before speaking again. "The ones on the right are real."_

_"So the ship we attacked today...." The large man trailed off, eyes wide and Nami nodded._

_"Yeah, they're likely the fuckers meddling with Barci."_

_She watched Yuki ball his fist, teeth gritted and went to offer a comforting pat when a subordinate called her name._

_"Akira! Someone's here for you! Pale, purple eyes, silver hair." Their cabin boy reported, giving a quick salute._

_"Akuma?" She asked, confused._

_Malachi whistled, the money momentarily forgotten. "Oooh it's the Captain's little BoYfRiEnD."_

_"I'll kill you." She stated simply._

_"He uh, he said that there's visitors here, got all smilely about it too."_

_Visitors._

_The teen looked back at the counterfeit beri, then at Yuki, who seemed to be thinking over the situation as well, then back at her cabin boy._

_And everything clicked._

_"Fuck." She muttered, pushing past her crew mates, shouting orders, unease building in the pit of her stomach. "Move. All of you, cover our tracks, make sure we're untraceable. If I see so much as a footprint in the dirt, it'll be another foot up your ass, do you understand? Yuki, you're with me."_

_"Aye aye!" The Shaytan Pirates responded and she allowed herself a tight grin._

_She was gifted with a great crew._

Not better than the Strawhats, but nice all the same. 

_-_

_"Babe, you're here. Fucking finally. I thought you'd gotten lost." Akuma drawled, waiting in his usual spot. Nami felt a sting of awkwardness, knowing that in technicality it wasn't her boyfriend, but she moved forwards anyways._

_"Yeah, whatever. I was conducting business. The hell are you way out here for anyways?" She questioned, giving the teen a warm hug, noting the feeling of calm that bloomed in her chest._

_"Oh, yeah, to tell you that you don't have to worry about the money anymore. We got some visitors today, they have it covered." The silver-haired teen explained excitedly. "You can keep adventuring now."_

_The feeling of dread came back stronger, with almost enough force to double her over._

_"Woah, okay, who the hell are you? Normally you're much more cynical than this."_

_Akuma looked at her in genuine confusion. "Honestly you're right, I feel kind of strange, off kilter but then again, this is the best news I've gotten in ages. We can save the village and all it takes is a little manual labor. They'll even pay us."_

_Nami was beyond concerned now, she was terrified, because the person speaking wasn't the one she knew. And when her boyfriend fell, it only made the feeling worse._

_"Fuck." She muttered. "Oi..oi...OI! Don't pass out yet! Who told you? Who told you this? What was the visitors name?"  
_

_Akuma didn't answer, mumbling something incoherent as he slipped into sleep, but she thought she heard the name Haichiro._

_Nami didn't see Yuki's dark eyes flash with malice._

_-_

_He woke up after a few hours, mildly confused and completely back to normal. It had been the work of a devil fruit, he told her. It was the only viable and available explanation. A Devil Fruit that made one see things, realistic things by the victims view._

_She could admit that she was more than a bit curious._

_Yuki asked when they would attack. "We have a target now." He said, the words coming out in a growl. "They don't even know we're here._

_Nami didn't answer._

_-_

_It was maybe her 6th time going under._

_It was too many times._

_But god was it **addicting.** Her world didn't miraculously change. It wasn't different, but holy fucking hell it wasn't the same. She could tell the difference between worlds, and had realized over time that it was due to her Devil Fruit abilities. Reality was like a rope around her waist, a string that tugged insistently, that she used to claw her way out of madness. _

_And each time the navigator let herself sink, it was progressively hard to find the surface._

_When she was in this state, she slept, because in her happy world, there was a happy childhood and she loved to dream of a place where that love was reciprocated._

_It was a way to view the person she might've become._

_To be surrounded by warmth, away from the harrowing life of a pirate._

_-_

_"HELLLLLLLLP."_

_Nami didn't know what it was that woke her. There was nothing but a permeating sensation of unease, and the strong, overpowering haze of the Mira-Mira no mi. She closed her eyes, planning to nap once more when a scream cut through the fog and pierced her eyes._

**_"HELP ME PLEASE!!!"_ **

_She jumped up, running towards the noise, the sound of a fight growing louder as she got near._

_Nami turned the corner and skid to a stop, bile rising up her throat._

_Blood._

_It was everywhere._

_It splattered the wall in a gruesome mural, and painted a violent story._

_The scent of metal was prominent, so much so that her shoes squeaked as she walked and stained the black combat boots._

_It was sickening._

_So fucking sick._

_And then she saw him._

_Yuki._

_There were two worlds. One was filled with blood, gore, and death hung in the air, even more than the boy who was hanging by his own entrails. The other world had the boy still in front of her, but he was smiling, mouth moving excitedly._

_She reached for the the Yuki who was grinning from ear to ear, throwing up when her hand phased through and his intestines proved to be a useless rope, falling on top of her, along with the body._

_He was still remarkably warm._

_"Akira." The teen croaked, giving a tiny, bloodied smile, face so damaged that it was unrecognizable. "Sorry. Looks like...I got a bit too reckless."_

_Nami couldn't respond. She was still pulling herself from that murky, blissful darkness. She was still yanking on that rope, trying to claw her way up but couldn't. Shecouldn'tshecouldn'tshe **couldn't.**_

_"Don't worry Aki." Yuki started, heartbeat stuttering in her limp, useless arms. "It wasn't...your fault."_

_The moment he died was the moment she pulled into reality, breaking free with a strength she didn't know she had._

_There wasn't even time to say goodbye._

* * *

-+-

* * *

Nami surged forward with an audible gasp, sweat making her orange hair stick to her stick like a glove. Tears ran down her face, uncontrollable, unstoppable, and incredibly salty.

But anything was better than that taste of iron.

The navigator reach across the table and gathered Akira into her arms, dropping his head into her breast and cradling him there. 

It was silent in the library, save for the occasional sniffles that came from her, Chopper and Usopp.

Warm tears ran down her arms, the shapeshifter's body having begun to shake and shudder. Nami just stroked his hair.

She glanced over at Zoro who was clutching Wado with a grip that turned his knuckles white, the only thing that belied his calm expression. Sanji was back to pacing, having lit a cigarette and looked enraged, and disgusted.

"So, you see now why we stressed it so much, right? Its not just for your safety, but for the safety of your nakama as well." Akuma stated dully, looking haggard. "Please, be careful okay?"

Luffy stood, his aura spiking, onyx eyes covered by raven hair.

It was _that_ look.

"Aki, please. Let me kill him."

Nami felt a shiver in her spine, but no bone in her body disagreed. 

A look around the room said everyone was on the same page.

_Ryunosuke Hachiro._

He'd better be prepared.

The Straw Hats were coming after him. 

And they were _pissed._

She let loose a viscous grin. 

"So what's the plan?" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well? What'd you think? Please let me know your thoughts, comments are appreciated!
> 
> I hope you enjoyed! <3


	16. Plans, Plans, Plans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "And what happens when they've conquered it all and there's not left to take?" Nami asked and Usopp felt dread settle in his gut as the realization hit him.
> 
> "They'll go after each other. Destroy their connections from the inside, until there is only one left."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Damn, about a month since the last update. Sorry about that.  
> I think I'm gonna take a bit of a break on this to work on another Zosan fic.

"It's something like an initiation. A game even. One with high risks, and even higher rewards." Akira spoke, his voice soft, wearing a mean grin. "And it uses humans as pawns."

Usopp felt his skin crawl, discomfort raging through his body as he gripped a tight curl, and tugged it. "W-what exactly is the endgame?" Because that's this was all gearing towards, right? Usopp knew games, and he knew stories even better. This was all one fucked up sequence of rising action. Like the horrid trip up Reverse Mountain, it was leading to something. The climax, the big bad, the moment of truth. "Why all this secrecy and being so meticulous? Why not attack? It isn't like anyone's there to stop them."

Akuma, the one with silver hair, ~~who made Usopp want to fucking piss his pants,~~ growled and the sniper struggled to not flinch under the heavy weight of that violet glare that promised violence. 

Right, the way he phrased that question _could_ come across as insulting, huh? Better fix that misunderstanding before he was subject to a slow, painful death. "A-ah! What I mean is that these people, the baddies, they have enough power to just storm the village don't they? And its not like they have competition. It just, it doesn't make sense, is all."

"He's right." Robin, blessed Robin, interjected, her voice rich and smooth, bronze skin darker in the dimly lit room. "It does seem rather impractical, considering the blatant facts. Attacking outright would be the best and most logical process, unless what drives them is more of a moral stance. Or lack thereof." She added as an after thought, words laced with venom, the way they always did when something unsavory was spoken about.

Akira cleared his throat, garnering everyone's attention once again, though Luffy looked half asleep. The sniper had been around long enough to not even be remotely worried. As long as they pointed him at the enemy, it'd all work out in the end. 

"The endgame, is slavery." The man stated, devoid of emotion, blue and green eyes blank. "That's what they desire most. Slavery caused by indentured servitude. Done so smoothly that the people in this village won't know what hit them until its much too late."

Usopp shivered, gripping the fabric of his overalls in moderate fear.

The ending of _that_ story sounded tragic. 

"Okay." Nami cut through, standing up and leaning forward, hands braced on the table. "We're all here, we're all on the same page. We got some info earlier, but how about we start from the beginning. Who are the Triumvirate, and what do they want with Barci?"

The shapeshifter laughed, dry and mirthless. "Why darling, they want everything we have and more. They're going to rob these people blind and take their labor as a souvenir. Who are Triumvirate?" The man repeated, tilting his head so that it landed in his palm. "They're businessmen, ruthless businessmen, who will destroy any and everything in their paths."

"As i said before, they're a crime syndicate." Akira continued. "Land Pirates if you will. Treasure stealing and all, without the life-endangering aspect of water. For the Devil Fruit users at least."

"Land Pirates!!" Luffy exclaimed, of _course_ wide awake out of the blue, and in a way that made the sniper genuinely impressed with his captain's selective hearing. "Guys, can we--"

"NO!!" They answered, Usopp most adamant of all. The 17 year old sat back, sulking with a large pout, but thankfully kept all the other outrageous ideas to himself. 

"This is what they do." The shapeshifter pressed forward. "Hunt on small islands like this one, and tell tales of grandeur. They come under the guise of building report, and under that mask they return, slowly infiltrating the economic functions. They make their presence known, get the people comfortable around them."

Nami grimaced, her eyes dark. "The parties." She state gravely, looking past Usopp, to the silver haired man--Akuma, who nodded solemnly. 

"The parties." He replied, confirming the navigator's assessment. "Real easy to slip something in a drink. Even easier afterwards to do whatever the hell you want." His violet eyes flashed. "Better too, with the aid of a Devil Fruit that makes most people as pliant as clay." 

Akira hummed, closing his eyes. "We tried, for a long time, to prevent the village from noticing their slow, but steady decline in trading partners. We often raided other pirates under the guise of Marines."

The man gave a sheepish grin. "I suppose I should apologize huh? I attacked your ship a few weeks ago, curious about the strength of Luffy's crew. When I deemed it adequate, I requested his help. "

Everyone gaped, and Usopp felt his mouth open like a fish as his captain laughed joyously. "Why are you all so surprised? I _told_ you I had business here." 

_Holy shit Luffy managed to plan ahead for something non-food related._ That's when the sniper knew that they were likely going to die. 

"So what happens when they've conquered it all and there's not left to take?" Nami asked, returning to the topic at hand and instantly the dark atmosphere returned. Usopp felt dread settle in his gut as the realization hit him.

"They'll go after each other. Destroy their connections from the inside, until there is only one left." It was made the most sense. Take over together, then take over each other. Until there was only one ruler and no one to challenge them. 

The thought was daunting. 

“So, how do we get in?” Nami asked after the silence persisted, leaning forward, her gaze intent.

Akira crossed his legs, blue and green eyes flashing dangerously. 

“Money, and lots of it. Are sort of...right of passage. At the very least, a way to buy yourself entry into their circle, take them down from the center. We’d do it but,” He shrugged grinning sheepishly. “There’s only so much cash that we can pillage before it starts leaving a trail. We try to keep rumors from spreading if and when at all possible.”

The red head tsked. “Which is why you want _our_ help. Since we happen to have cash on hand.”

Akuma laughed, seemingly well acquainted with the viscous loan shark that resided withing the woman. “Look on the bright side. All you’ll really be doing is stealing it back with interest.”

She wasn’t impressed. “Yeah, and if we lose this gamble of yours, not only will be _dead_ , but broke too.”

Zoro scoffed, crossing his arms. Usopp watched as the swordsman rolled his eyes, exasperation rolling off him in large waves. Clearly the large teen didn’t see what the big deal was. _All we have to do is win. That easy._ Was probably what the fucking idiot was thinking, though Usopp would never expression those thoughts aloud as he valued the already little time alive that he possessed. 

“Scared you won’t have enough beli to bribe your way into heaven, witch?” Zoro asked, a taunt in his tone, clearly trying to provoke the red head. Which worked, if her twitching eye and scoff were anything to go by. 

“As if. God _owes_ me, plus interest you clueless shit. We got rid of his phony. Or did you forget? The moss on your head finally clog your shitty excuse for a brain?”

The tan teen snorted, a smile working its way over his features. "Stealing insults from the cook now are you? I'm disappointed witch, you're better than this."

They stared at exh other before breaking into a small fit of laughter. 

Usopp sighed.

What the hell had they just signed up for?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed. Leave a comment, let me know what you think <3
> 
> I think I'm going to go ahead and take a short(hopefully) break from this fic. I apologize.  
> In the mean time I'll be writing 'Borne of Blood, Thicker than Water'. Please do check it out, if it interests you.


	17. Falling In Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I knew a lady once. She taught me and Ace about manners. Though it never did stick."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This'll be the last chapter of this fic  
> Hope you enjoy!
> 
> not beta'd :')

"Everyone, leave the room. Sanji and Akira, stay." Luffy commanded and Sanji felt his body freeze, reaching into his pocket to grasp desperately for a cigarette. He couldn't light it, not here in the library, but the bitter taste of nicotine soothed him. The crew filed out, Zoro being the last to go and avoided the teen's sight, purposely choosing not to look over. 

The door shut quietly, clicking as Akuma walked out. Sanji ran a hand through his hair, sucking on dry air and glancing to the side as he heard clothes rustling. He watched with widening eyes as Luffy lowered himself to the ground, knees bent and head touch the ground, back arched in a perfect bow.

"I'm sorry Sanji." The raven head said, grave and remorseful. "You're so sad, and even though you're Nakama, I haven't taken care of you."

"What are you doing idiot?" He squawked rushing over to the teen, cigarette on the floor long forgotten and pushing the deceptively strong shoulder back, trying to life his captain from the submissive position. “You don’t have to apologize, it’s me. It’s my fault. It’s _always_ my fault. “

“Shihihihi, Sanji’s an idiot. He’s so nice.” Luffy replied with a chip, beginning to stand and dust off his clothes, reaching blindly for the straw hat before seeming to remember that it was no longer there. “I’m gonna tell you the same thing I told Zoro; we’re pirates! If you want something, Sanji, take it. It's like I always say, when you’re hungry, eat.” 

His captain gave a self assured nod, expression a completely different kind of serious, in a way that was almost comical. “When I told Zoro, instead of taking you, he decided to make you hate him, because he knew you’d still be nakama. Zoro could tell and I couldn’t. That you had mean people telling you mean things.” Luffy rocked back onto his heels, looking contemplative. “But you know, I’m your captain. Sanji should only take orders from me, and _not_ the mean voices in his head. Or I’ll kick their ass! Yosh!”

Sanji stood, staring, only mildly confused when his vision became blurry. “I don’t think you can fight things without a body Luffy. Kinda impossible.”

“Yada! I can!” The raven protested, stretching forward and wrapping himself around the blond in a suffocating hug. “We just have to love you so much that they go away. Far away!” The teen practically giggled, burying his face in the crook of Sanji’s neck. “I can do that real easy, I love Sanji! The whole crew does! Zoro too.”

“You think so?” The chef whispered. “Even as shitty as I treated him?” 

“Yosh! Zoro is a lot like Sanji! Like how Sanji gives me meat whenever I want and is always so kind, Zoro is loyal. Zoro won’t leave Sanji. If Sanji says no, Zoro will respect it, but he won’t leave. He won’t stop loving.” Luffy placed another sloppy kiss in his cheek, beginning to untangle himself. “Because Zoro doesn’t know _how.”_

“Huh.” Sanji murmured, his heart fluttering. “Okay.”

“Sanji,” Luffy called, interrupting his thoughts, “You can say no. But please don’t make Zoro think you’ll say yes. You’re going to find the All Blue, so I won’t let you drown in sadness. Zoro is going to be the greatest swordsman,” Luffy’s voice pitched lower, dark and determined. “So I won’t let him die from a broken heart.”

“I understand. I know my answer Captain, I just need some time to understand it.”

The raven head brightened up considerably, flashing a wide smile. “That's why Akira’s here! He can help you! I want you to talk to him, okay?”

The teen turned to walk out the room, bounding towards the door gleefully before Sanji stopped him, having remembered something. 

“Since when did you learn such formal behaviors? You almost gave me a heart attack earlier, I didn’t think it was you!”

“Oh! Shihihihi,” Luffy laughed rubbing under his nose with a slight flush to his cheeks. “"I knew a lady once. She taught me and Ace about manners. Though it never did stick. But I made you sad, and I want to make nakama sad, so I thought I’d try it out for once.”

Sanji grinned, shaking in head, affection flowing through his body. “You sure are something, you know that?”

“Yeah! I’m the future King of The Pirates!” the teen responded, before disappearing from sight, his loud cheer echoing on the ship. 

The chef tensed, remembering that someone else was in the room. He turned slowly, daring himself not to flinch as he made contact with that green and blue gaze. 

Akira put Sanji on edge. His-- her-- _their--_ very existence threw out of whack all of the principals that he’d been taught since birth. It was both an unnerving and liberating thing to come face to face with the natural enemy of his own twisted ideology. Akira smirked, raising his hands in a placating manner, before gesturing silently to the empty table and chair.

Without a word, Sanji sat, trying to loosen himself up, not sure if he should rush to grab a drink and grovel or act with his normal abrasive nature towards men. 

“You’re wary of me. Of the things I can do. I suppose that's reasonable.” Arika started, voice calm and slightly different. No longer deep and clearly masculine, but higher, not quite like a lovely woman, but not much different from one either. Neutral almost. “Ne, Sanji, tell me. Are you disgusted because of what-- _who--_ I am?” The last bit was said in a sultry lilt. 

The chef forced his head away, cheek burning as the shapeshifter changed, becoming curvier, hair growling to fall gracefully over one shoulder, before reverting to a muscular stature with bronze skin and shocking green hair. 

“Or are you frightened because you know somewhere deep inside that no matter the forms you’ve seen me take, you found me utterly attractive?” Zoro said to him amber eyes alight with mischief. 

"Don't." Sanji whispered, shaking in his seat, unable too look away. "Don't use his face."

"Why not?" Zoro-- _Akira--_ purred, leaning his head down on the palm of his hand. "This may be the only chance you get to kiss him without repercussions. You know, since you fucked that up already. Blew your only chance to bits. Ah, sorry, was that too gay sounding for you?" 

" _Stop."_

"Oooh, I have an even better idea!" A rough, but feminine voice exclaimed, hands clapping excitedly and the chef's eyes widened, watching as Zoro's hips slimmed. His hair remained short and choppy but the narrowed eyes bloomed into large, golden orbs. Her arms were still littered in scars, chest large and tantalizing. "How about now? This is what you really wanted, right? A woman like Zoro bonus points for if the woman _is_ Zoro. If only he’d been born without a dick you could love freely.”

The female Zoro grinned at him, dark and viscous. “Because that's how you were raised to love, right, _shit cook?_ That’s how you want to love? Always holding yourself back.”

“Shut _up.”_ Sanji growled. _“And stop using his face._ Don’t you _dare_ disrespect Zoro because of _my_ fuck ups.”The room fell silent, enough for the chef’s cheeks to flush and an apology to form on the tip of his tongue before Akira laughed. The man was back to normal, black hair once more shaggy and long. 

"I'm sorry for laughing. This is a hard time for you, and trust me, I'm aware. These times are rather difficult for myself." The shapeshifter gifted him with a small smile. "It's just-- I don't think you quite realize. You love Zoro." 

The chef gave the man a puzzled glare. "No shit." He said, registering with the start of surprise, that there was hardly any disgust from the revelation. "Thats the problem."

Akira only shook his head.

"No Sanji. It isn't. I don't think you get it. You _love_ Zoro. Whether he was a man, or a woman, those feelings wouldn't change. You proved that just now." The man leaned forward, grabbing the blond's hands in a tight grip. "Would it be fair to say then, that gender is irrelevant, and that you should just let yourself love? As all humans do."

Sanji stared in open shock, his mouth hanging open a bit and it felt as though the words of his childhood were melting. It wasn't all gone, no lesson that ingrained would ever disappear completely, but it was a start, and a damn good one.

_Oh._

_I love Zoro._

Sanji smiled, a weird feeling in his chest. "Holy shit, I'm an idiot, aren't I?" 

"Damn right, but its okay. No one's saying you should run out declaring your love. Its good enough for now that you realize things aren't always black and white. That you can be gray, pink, blue, or whatever else without having to fear." Akira told him. "I don't want you to lose anyone thats close."

The chef narrowed his eyes, remembering the vision he'd seen just earlier. "We're going to help you. I swear it."

The shapeshifter nodded. "I know. But that will come. Right now you have something to do, don't you?"

"I suppose I _did_ owe the marimo a meal. And an explanation." Sanji stood, walking around to the the other side of the table and hesitating, before opening his arms for a hug. 

Akira tossed his head back, giving a loud laugh. "Good luck cook. Find me when you're finished, I'll be formulating a plan. And there's an idea that concerns you."

"Me?"

"Yeah, while Luffy was rambling to be about the past 10 years, he mentioned something about being trapped and a certain Mr. Prince saving them. I think that might be useful." Akira waved his hand dismissively. "But enough of that, go already dumbass."

Sanji flicked the man off, much to his amusement and walked out the library, making his way above deck. It was silent, save for Nami scolding Luffy and Usopp playing with Chopper. Slowly, the chef made his way to the Crow's Nest, pausing only a moment before knocking. 

The door opened and Zoro looked at him in surprise. With the start, the chef felt as though they were back to _that_ day, a few months ago. Clearly, the other teen felt it as well because he crossed his arms and glared. "What do you need, shit cook?"

He grinned, making sure it was as genuine as he could make it "Oi, had the moss already infected your brain and given you memory loss? Get your ass to the galley. I owe you a few things." Sanji turned, walking off and not looking back.

A few moments later he felt a warm, but cautious presence. Zoro walked next to him, arms swinging. Close but not quite touching. "You seem different. Finally get your shit together?" The swordsman asked, voice carefully devoid of any emotion. 

"Yeah." The chef replied, taking the chance that he wouldn't get immediately punched and slid his hand from his pocket, reaching over tentatively to twine his pinki with Zoro's. The swordsman stiffened, but didn't pull away, instead curling the small digit tighter around his own. "I did. But we can talk about it-- _really_ talk about it after I feed you."

He looked directly forward, refusing to glance over as he answered. "That sound good to you Zoro?"

There was a beat of silence then, "Yeah Sanji its fine. But I'm hungry as fuck though so lets hurry up." The green hair teen responded, though he did nothing to change their pace. 

There were some crazy ass shit going on on this island, and soon Sanji and everyone else would be dragged into some elaborate scheme that'll likely get them killed. But Sanji didn't think of all that, instead focusing the person next to him, and the small baby steps towards a better future. 

"You know cook." Zoro said, letting out a cough that mirrored a laugh. "I always wanted to tell you that your dream of chasing the All Blue made no sense." The swordsman continued before Sanji could retort. "Any pirate worth their shit has felt the pull of the ocean. _That's,_ a pirate's nature. And well," Zoro broke off and Sanji watched, with a sense of glee as he saw the flush spreading across tan skin. 

"You've been drawing me in from the start, with those weird-ass eyes of yours." 

"You're an idiot." The chef responded. _An Idiot that I love._

Yeah.

For now, this was okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry if it felt too rushed. 
> 
> As my first fic in this fandom, it has a lot of characterizations that aren't so good. Still though, I adore this fic, and it has some of my best writing personally. 
> 
> Let me know your thoughts! I'm so very curious! <3 Might or might not be a part two.  
> Seriously please. I'm begging. This was my first baby so I REALLY want to know what you thought, both the good and bad!!!
> 
> Thanks for following me on this. I appreciate all of you, very much! If you want, please come talk to me @ https://lovelybutnot-ablankcanvas.tumblr.com/


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